Mindless Escape
by xavilla
Summary: Reid trusts Morgan more than anymore so he shares his biggest secret with him (confession about Emily). Morgan exposes his secret to Emily and before she has time to react the California case throws the trio in a grave and cold situation. This is a story about the ups and downs in life of Agent Reid and how he effects the team around. A Morgan/Reid/Emily friendship struggle story
1. Chapter 1

**Mind-Less Escape**

**Chapter 1: The Usual **

For centuries humans are consistent in doing one thing, killing each other. I often thought about this while driving to my workplace. It made me hopeless at times that those infinite monsters out there will never end. I agree most of the time this job drains the blood out of my veins but it never disappointed me.

Lost is those common thoughts, I parked my car in front of the Quantico building. The early morning 6 am call pulled me out of my deepest sleep as my Boss Hotch ordered me to show up at work after enjoying the week off. Everyone starts the break so excited, so happy to be away from corpses but I was dying to get back. Sitting in my car seat, I was almost too excited to meet my team which I prefer to call my family after a long time.

I almost tripped over the stairs rushing my way to my desk. I learned my lesson a while ago to never use the elevators. Secretly, I have developed a phobia for it now but our kido genius pulled the string for too long before finally letting go of it. I was actually embarrassed.

I opened the glass doors into the world of FBI. I always noticed the smell of the BAU as I entered the smell of crowd, old papers and files. I certainly not miss that! I reached the corner of my desk and saw Reid sitting on my chair going through some papers. He was again wearing his dumb-nerd looking glasses that I highly disliked. I rather not have him walk beside me with those on; it always challenged my sense of style. But, at that time I was more offended with him sitting on my desk than resting those glasses on his nose. I cleared my throat as I stood beside him. To my surprise, he ignored and went on reading the paper in his hands. I shifted myself a little more closely to him. He hates close proximity so I pulled that trick out of my hat.

"If you are trying to annoy me, don't!" Reid finally spoke and pushed me back a little with his hand but keeping his eye on the paper. I moved back willingly. My eyes landed on the desk right across me so I ran over and started opening and closing the drawers. Invading genius's privacy was like stepping on his throat. He dashed from the seat and walked over near me with the angriest look he got.

"What the hell?" He said in his high annoyed tone. I looked up.

"Why, I needed to sit somewhere" I answered innocently.

"I was sitting at your desk for a reason" Reid went on with his annoyed tone.

"It better be good" I closed the drawer.

"I was sitting there to remind me of something I needed to tell you. I knew that an annoyed Morgan would not fail triggering the retrieval clues." Reid went on "So thank you".

"Like you can get any weirder" I pulled out of his chair and he let go off a little giggle as I walked past him back to my desk. That smart ass knew exactly how to ruin my day with his weirdness. I couldn't hold back my smile thinking about how much I missed getting my mornings starting up like this.

"Look at our boys, they didn't even said hi to us" JJ's voice got closer to my ear and I turned my chair around to see two beautiful baby girls walking over to our desk.

"Morning boldies!" I called out. Emily came and sat on top of my desk as JJ just stood there posing.

"So how did the week go?" Emily asked picking up a pencil from my desk and playing with it.

"Ahh—couldn't get any better" I pulled a smiled and asked "You got all the sleep huh?"

"Tons of sleep, my body was actually aching" Emily answered and turned around to notice the stiff Reid lost in reading the papers he held.

"And you Reid, how many books did you memorize over the break?" Emily mocked and I joined in with a laugh. Teasing the pretty boy was like our hobby.

Without shifting his gaze he answered "I don't memorize books!"

"I am so jealous of this paper right now stealing all your attention!" JJ added her bit of teasing.

"It's the instruction sheet of my final term thesis for philosophy. It is about comparing the habituation abilities of human mind with a stone. Interesting huh" Reid finally looked over and waited for warm excited expressions but got emotionless still faces staring at him instead.

"With a stone, how is it even possible?" JJ asked.

"Throughout the history, human mind have been extensively being compared to physical structure of a stone dismissing the actual rigid properties, the formation of a stone is quite similar to how the mind evolution came to be" Reid went on doing his favourite thing in the universe, thinking out loud. At times, it amazed what his mind was busy processing.

"Good for you" Emily made a face and slipped off the desk.

"Hotch wants to see all of us now" JJ told us and we got up to get the briefing on the latest case we will be handling for the next couple of days.

The case briefing was surprisingly short as it was one of the rare cases, couple killing. I made myself a quick coffee with Reid pouring sugar like Niagara Falls.

"You wanted to tell me something?" I leaned over the counter near Reid and his too-sweet coffee.

"More like wanted to ask you something" He stirred his coffee.

"What's there in the world that you don't know about?" I frowned.

"There is one thing you are more specialized in then me" Reid looked up and sipped some coffee to test the sweetness.

"Girls?" I asked after thinking for a while.

"Hmm—that's more of the broad category of my question. I wanted to know how you leave impression on girls you meet." Reid asked hesitantly.

"How come pretty boy so interested in my skills all of a sudden?" I teased.

"Not interested just curious" Reid said making one if his innocent faces.

"So, you are hiding something from me?" I asked

"No"

"You met a girl over the break?"

"No"

"You wanted to impress her?"

"No"

"You failed so now need my help?"

"No, no, no! Let me explain first." Reid raised his voice just a little to gain my attention. The little smirk on his face told the whole story straight. Although, he was awkwardly social but he was never quiet around us. Looking at him, I learned that shyness doesn't accompany silence.

"I am a profiler wonder boy" I laughed off another comment to completely shut him down. It was unintentional.

"Forget it!" He walked away probably realizing the uplifting storms of my comments harassing him from every corner.

…..

In half an hour, we were ready to take off from our private BAU plane to California. The ride was long and boring as Reid was sleeping for the most part. Emily and JJ were busy with their own bingo game rounds and Rossi was reading and discussing the content with Hotch. And there was me skipping songs on my IPod. My eyes focused on the song list that Reid abruptly shifted on his seat. The expression on his face very tensed, his fingers tightly curled in fists. He started to breath unevenly. I looked around to see if anyone else was noticing what I was seeing. For few seconds, the innocent face turned into rigid sickened face. He must be having a nightmare or something, I thought to myself.

Lost in those thoughts, I heard a loud bang and realized Reid just fell off his seat and was brutally pulled out of his sleep.

"Hi-man, are you okay?" I got up and presented my hand for support. He looked flushed out.

"Oh, my back hit hard" Reid managed to speak after a while and stood up to see everyone gathering around. He excused himself from rest to go to washroom. I followed him. I waited until he came out with a wet face.

"Nightmare?" I inquired.

"Nope, it's just those intense headaches coming back" He answered pushing the door close behind him.

"You saw the doctor right?" I asked. His eyes just kept staring at me for a while as if he was deciding of how much to tell me. I knew he was hiding something from us, from me.

"They got nothing" he said. I gave him the unsatisfied stare to give him the signal that I knew he was lying. By now, our friendship was so strong that our eyes did the talking more than our mouths.

"Headaches are just the start Morgan" he let out the words watching his feet, the gesture of embarrassment. I placed my hand on his shoulder and he rose his head up.

"Start of what?" I asked.

"No one needs to know as of now; I don't want to lose my job this early on" Reid said.

"You can trust me boy" I assured him and he walked back to the cabin but my feet were frozen. Headaches were commonly associated with our work but this genius was experiencing them for quite a long time now. During those days, he would turn so cranky and rude but he never told anyone else about it. This was the onset of schizophrenia for him which meant the end of his brilliant mind. He knew every passing minute his brain was degenerating and there was nothing he could do. I remember once at a bar he told me something that never left my mind afterwards. His words, his tone, the underlying sadness breaks me into tears every time I revived them.

"_Morgan, since childhood I was treated different. I was never meant to be normal like you. No matter how much I try to fit in, the opposing forces will always be stronger. Looking at my father, I always wanted to become one myself to break all the stereotypes that he created. Sad part, with a dangerous mind like me, I can never even dream of that. It's like owning an unwanted weapon. There's nothing more fearing to me than myself." _

I remember his exact words from that night and how much they meant to me. He often called me lucky for a reason I had my mind in my possession.

"_The real tragedy occurs when you cannot trust yourself anymore" _

At times, I would ponder on those words of Reid. My first impression of him labelled him as someone 'different' and 'weird', someone every excluded and someone who loved being alone but the only thing he ever hated with passion was loneliness.

The real Reid was slowly unfolded to me as every day I learned how the wonder boy operated. I never met someone more caring and concerning of other people in my life. From victims to unsubs, the level of empathy was same. It surprised me of how much he was desperate for warmness and love. Few words of care were enough to stretch those lips into beautiful smile.

Looking at his thin, fragile frame, others often had mistaken him of being vulnerable and at misery of others. He too was well aware of how people perceived him and felt helpless when these comments came out of woman's mind.

"_How can you even think any woman would ever wanna be with me?" Reid often questioned me._

I never had any answer to this; I wish I had, to prove him wrong. The idea of love always teased his mind but he never gave much thought to it. I wish I could tell him how wrong he was when he refused to look at himself in the mirror for too long. I wish I could point him out those startling features with a prominent jaw line that outlined his face into something very pleasing to the eye. He rejected to view himself as beautiful.

With me, he was more open than a window on the highest floor. He once told me how he had a little crush on Emily. In his mind, she was the strongest girl he has ever met in his life. Unlike going for the looks, he went after her traits, things he would sometimes notice in her for days and then present them to me.

"_If I can only get the guarantee of my mind, I would so wanna marry her" _


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Long Road**

From that day on, I teased him every second of his life. Annoyed he was at himself to tell me his secrets but he had no one but me.

I snapped out of my thoughts as soon as the plane landed. The police station wasn't far from the airport so we got there on time and introduced our team to the new investigators. JJ started to set the table up for us, taking out federal files, crime scene photos and other evidences.

"Morgan and Rossi, you are coming with me to the crime scene, Reid and Emily contact the guardian for the first victim. We will meet here in three hours to see if we can give a profile" Hotch assigned us our jobs.

I elbowed Reid to getting my daily dose of teasing him. He gave me a smile in return. He was looking at Emily standing beside me getting the guardian address.

"How about you tell her today?" I whispered lightly before his ear. He jerked at my words.

"That's never happening" he answered fixing his gaze back to her, to the object of his constant smile.

"Okay so that's 10 miles from here, let's get going then kid" Emily put the map in her pocket and spoke directly to Reid.

"Kid?" Reid softly exhaled the word.

"Hi, are you even listening?" Emily snapped in front of his face. He blinked few times before answering.

"I have a name so you can refer to it when you need my attention" he said.

"Oh but I rather call you a kid, I like it that way" Emily smirked.

"I don't like to be called that" Reid mentioned this time more annoyed than before. They both left afterwards. I wish I could just see how Reid will approach Emily throughout their time alone but it was time to focus more on the case than on my fellow agents.

Rossi was a very unique addition to our team, the king of humour as some would say. He contrasted Hotch very much which made them get into arguments often. The crime scene was left as it was for us to investigate. The three hours went by so fast that we didn't realize. We head back gathering bits and pieces of information regarding the damp site.

Back at station, the lunch was already ordered for us and we joined up with rest of the team. We attacked food and gobbled down whatever came in our sight. Reid and Hotch made their way out to attend some journalists screaming. I came and sat beside Emily still busy eating her last bits.

"So how was the meeting with the guardian?" I asked

"It's always difficult, parents were devastated" she answered.

"Oh, and how was Reid?" I asked.

"What do you mean how was he? As he usually is, talkative, rambling and so on" she rolled her eyes as she spoke of him.

"There's something funny" I started off "that kid is kinda gaga over you". Her eyes widened a little and she laughed a hazy laugh.

"Like exactly how?" she interested asked.

"Falling for you, wanting to be with you" I signalled.

"Ah, so cute of him but I never even looked at him like that way. He's like my bro" Emily clarified.

"He's not your type?" I asked.

"Naah, he's adorable kind but not someone I would spend my whole life with. I mean I can go more for a tough-physical kind. And, in BAU we are not allowed to have any relationship with each other so that rules out everything" Emily bluntly answered and finished chewing her food but smiling at the same time.

Oh, pretty boy will fall apart knowing she is rejecting him based on the label of "weak kid". Just then, Hotch and Reid came back chatting.

"Signal transduction is often intercepted with medicine like this stopping the phosphorylation of G-proteins found at the plasma membrane" Reid continued to talk and Hotch waved his hand to stop him. Does he actually think his intelligence can leave impression on woman? He really needs my help.

"Time to give the profile." Local investigator sneaked in the door and spoke.

"We are looking for a killer, in a very unstable mental state" Hotch spoke.

"The trigger for his psychotic break could be a recent betrayal possibly by a woman near his age" Reid added.

"This man hunts out couples transferring the revenge on them" Rossi presented.

"This type of killer is highly unpredictable and is more aggressive towards the female victims by overkilling them" I said.

After the profile was delivered to the police team and displayed on the media, we got ready to take action as soon as needed. The Unsub was hunting out tonight again but his victims, probably a couple.

I get in our van with Emily and Reid while Hotch, JJ and Rossi got in another. It was time to split up and hunt that bastard down. I was not sleeping until he's taken care of today.

"He's very particular about his victims, not once did he alter his victimology" Reid spoke sitting beside me on the passenger seat as I drove.

"Police is heavily on patrol so keep an open eye for any civilians at this hour" Hotch's voice echoed from Reid's phone "Take a special look near the parking lots, that's where he will probably strike". I nodded and continued driving. We had this before many times but the tension was always immense. Just then, a police car drove past our van giving us smiles as they overtook my speed.

"Immaturity at this time!" Emily spoke before behind. I took the next exit and the van sped on a small dark road.

"Why must we take this area for patrol?" Emily asked as she turned her head around to see nothing but darkness hovering over the van.

"We are not alone, there's supposedly five police cars on the same route" I answered. The ride became too silent as we continued driving. The phone rang in Reid's hand.

"Yes, Hotch" He answered putting him on speaker.

"There is some activity found near route 90, get there as fast as possible" he told us in a hurry tone.

"On it!" I yelled.

"The route 90 is like 2 miles from here" Reid said getting all nervous in his seat. The accelerator underneath my foot pressed harder and the speedometer started going up in a constant force. We zoomed flashed the darkness. I wanted to get this over fast.

"Look out!" Reid yelled spotting a man standing few meters from our sight. The involuntary response took over and I pushed the breaks as hard as possible spinning the van around the man slipping off the road into the dark field. The van rocked and bumped the field with a powerful force breaking some of the windows of the van.

The van came to a stop finally with nothing stopping us from flying out but our seat belts. The damaged was done. I took some breathes before releasing my belt and opening the door. Reid hit his head on the dashboard and got himself out of the car pulling the back door fling open.

"Emily?" He inquired. I roared toward the road to see the messed up man not there anymore. I got my gun out and flash light to search here and there. The road was stretching darkness for miles in either direction and there was no sign of anyone. There was definitely someone there few seconds ago; my own eyes saw the image of that man.

"Anyone there?" I yelled out in the darkness flashing the light around to catch movement. I was as tensed as possible on top the darkness blindly me and possibly hiding the man out. I could sense danger and my feet fell cold.

There was something behind me, someone walking, I shifted pointed the gun yet again towards darkness. I could hear someone breathing close to me.

"Emily, Reid!" I called out.

"REID!" I yelled even louder.

"Right here" I heard Reid's voice over from inside the van. I felt someone's presence even closer this time before finally a lash on my head ended the confusion and I fell flat on that long road regretting that very moment for rest of my life.

Something warm and wet was slipping underneath my head. I was in semi-conscious state. I was still on the road. I could hear distinct voices. A bullet shot echoed in my ear and everything felt numb.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: The Couple**

Footsteps, metal, footsteps, metal. Where was I? The smell was too familiar, too close, something crawling on my forehead, tickling me. I shifted around. Eyes, craving to open. Something has happened, very bad.

I opened my vision gates, windows to the world. My eyes, aching with pain and my hands; they were tied up with chains. Metal.

My ears, all they could detect were footsteps. With water-filled eyes, I tilted my head a little to widen up my visionary field. The four walls were cemented, no windows, just a metal door. The room was poorly lit. With time, more and more senses came to work. I shifted my gaze around and found my feet tied too. Beside my feet, a hand lying lifelessly, the hand I recognized very well. My eyes started to move inch by inch above the hand, to the arm, to elbow, the shoulder and towards the owner of those ten fingers.

Panic choked my throat as I started to recognize the body lying in front of me. My friend Reid was unconscious. Bound with metal chains, I could not advance further to check on him. My eyes did the work of hands and traced all over his body. There was no sign of any blood or bruises.

_The bullet shot!_

I heard that when I was on the road, that man standing in middle of the road, van falling off the road… It took time realizing we were in wrong hands, the man got to us before we could get to him. Beside Reid, Emily was placed on her back; her head facing the ceiling. Her eyes were shut close tight.

"Reid!" I yelled out. There was no answer. I tried to shift my bound feet closer to his hand. The chains were prevented further movements but I pushed further. I lifted my feet a little and placed it on top of Reid's hand lying beside. In an attempt to wake him up, I pressed his hand down hard rubbing his palm with the sole of my shoes.

"Come on pretty boy, wake up!" I let out desperately. The footsteps got even closer, the metal door fling open and a man stood over us smiling.

"Pretty boy?" He mocked and laughed.

"Who the hell are you?" I yelled at him as he stepped little more close.

"Does that even matter now; your angel of death or whatever the shit you want to call me?"

"What do you want from us?" I asked even more angrily this time hoping to wake them.

"Us? You are even not included" He answered back and lifted my feet off Reid's hand and threw them aside.

"WHAT?" I raised my voice. He ignored me and grabbed both of Reid's wrists and curled his fingers around. He started to drag him out of the room.

"Hi man, listen, please, don't hurt him!" I said in a lighter tone scared of what might happen next. He was our Unsub, we knew his methods but facing the real situation was nothing compared to reading the tragedy in the federal files. He kept sliding him out of the room and soon out of my sight.

"We can help, stop William!" I yelled again. He ignored me completely like I was nothing.

_You are not even included. _

He came back and did the same with Emily's body. He lugged her.

"They don't even fit your victimology, leave them alone!" I yelled as he came back to close the door on me. He just stared right into my eyes before suddenly pulling the gun out from his pocket. He pointed it toward me.

"Witnesses don't get to live, ever" He said.

"You don't have to kill me, take me with you" I requested. He brought his finger to the trigger.

"Don't" I yelled and he pulled the trigger. There was no shot, no bullet in his magazine.

"Lucky, that never happens usually. I'll be back so say your prayers." He worriedly said examining his gun out of his bullets.

_Lucky, Lucky, Lucky_

His words hunted me with Reid's voice over-toning the same words. Was I really lucky or was this just a coincidence. At that moment of helplessness, I wanted to block all thoughts about what this Unsub might do with Emily and Reid. I had to get out as soon as possible. I struggled a little in the chains checking their strengths. Sitting quietly and doing nothing was not in my blood so I slithered on the floor in hope to get to the door eventually.

_You are not even included. _

"Please don't hurt them" I lightly said to myself, the last thing I ever want to watch was to see tears in Emily and Reid's eyes. I continued slithering until friction was burning my bum. I rested my head on the nearest wall. It seemed like hours had been passed of me being alone in the old rusty room. I just wished the Unsub came back even to kill me so this waiting could end.

_You are not even included. _

My forehead was bleeding and the intense headache was taking over me, slowly destroying my inner strength. I closed my eyes.

The next time I opened my eyes, I found myself bound to the wall now, hooks holding the chains in place so I don't slither around again. The door fling opens and Unsubs walks in right in front of my face. He quickly unwound the chains and allowed my hands some freedom.

"I changed my mind; you are coming in to watch" Unsub spoke nicely this time. I got confused with the sudden change in his tone.

"This means we can go" I asked.

"I want you to witness me rescuing your friend from that witch" He softly answered. Maybe, this Unsub wants to prove his point. He might have potential to be talked out of this.

"Witch?" I asked

"Using him for her worldly greed, the innocent man never understands" He stood up and I followed him. We walked from the dark room to a small alley. He kept the gun pointed to my head. So, this man was definitely very precise and smart. He never lets his guard down. No wonder we couldn't track him. He entered a room not brightly lit. They room had no furniture but a chair at the corner. The other corner resided Emily and Reid sitting side by side with their hands tied at the back and feet bound together. They both looked up as we entered.

Unsub forcedly pushed me toward the chair keeping his gun pointed at me at all times. He quickly ensured I was tied to the chair preventing any movement. He then moved toward the FBI agents on the other side. Emily's hairs were all messed up. There were clear signs of beating. Maybe she fought off with him.

The Unsub dragged Reid with his hairs. He pushed him on the floor and with a loud thug he landed on his knees. His hairs all messed up, his lips bruised and bleeding. He looked up at my face with concerning expressions.

"Reid, are you okay?" I asked ignoring the Unsub's presence. The terror was sparking in his eye. I felt so bad.

"I never had three before, this is new" Unsub asked.

"What do you want from us?" Reid asked. Unsub eyed him softly.

"Nothing, it's you who need me" Unsub answered.

"I don't need you, let us go" Reid plead.

"Foolish! Idiot!" Unsub yanked Reid forward winging his body a little before he stabilized again.

"I am gonna make you free yourself from this witch" Unsub pointed to Emily literally yelling. The Unsub face changed suddenly and now displaying disgusted expression. I concluded that he was bipolar.

"She's not a witch, she's a woman for God's sake" I added to test the Unsub's reaction. He never replied rather he took a knife out from his pocket. He got scared and felt sorry at the same time.

He pulled Reid by his hair again.

"Stay still" He ordered as he cut the ropes from Reid's wrists freeing his hands. He then did the same with his feet.

"There is a way out only if you cooperate with me, okay" Unsub calmed again. Reid, the master manipulator of emotions was ready to play off. He knew this was the only way out.

"Okay but I am not her partner" He spoke.

"Don't lie, there is no need to protect her anymore" Unsub said.

"You are mistaken, we are just FBI agents not a couple" Reid voice broke a little as he continued to convince him. The Unsub abruptly rose up and punched Emily right in her face. It happened so fast before anyone could react, he launched another one.

"Stop man!" I yelled. He continued lashing at her with punching. Emily barely reacted after few more.

"I am not MISTAKEN!" He yelled as he attacked.

"Okay, I am sorry. You are right, please stop!" Reid pleaded rising his voice. Unsub stopped at those words hitting his ears.

"She got you all bound with her magic, isn't she?" He asked. Reid gasped looking at Emily barely conscious now. The guilt was filling in his eyes. The hardest part was for me keeping silent and not yelling at that bastard mentally torturing Reid.

"You want to protect her so bad but look at her. She has no feeling for you, does she" Unsub asked politely. The dramatic shift in his personality was so overwhelming for any of us to digest.

"We are just agents, stop it with your fantasy" Emily almost whispered with her eyes closed.

"Shut the hell up witch!" Unsub yelled.

"Let us go!" Emily's voice cracked with pain screeching on her face.

"Liar, Cheater!" Unsub yelled in her direction.

"I am not what you think!" Emily continued the psychodrama with the Unsub. He raised his hand and stopped right when Reid started to talk.

"We know you are broken but that doesn't mean you break others. I understand the betrayal you went through. We studied you, we can help you out. This isn't about us but you. No man deserves betrayal and not even you. Trust me" Reid spoke softly launching his first attack of words to calm him down.

"You don't know me" Unsub withdrew from Emily and paying more attention to Reid's soothing voice.

"We do know you. You are very important to us so let us help you. I know you are tired" Reid spoke and the Unsub walked over to him with the knife. Reid moved a little to keep a safe distance between him and the knife.

"No one can help me. There was no one to help me. I gave in everything I had. I drowned in loans and bankruptcy. Everything I owned, I gave in but NO! Her pretty face hid the evil intentions so well. I fell for them, I ruined myself. No one helped." Unsub's eye almost tearing up thinking of his loss.

"Help is here you just need to realize—"Reid's words got interrupted as Unsub violently grabbed him by his shoulders.

"I'll make sure I help. She will pay for playing you. You don't have to be like me. I am going to save you" Unsub spoke passionately. His false ideology heated up my mind.

"She's just—just my friend" Reid innocently answered trying to loosen the grip on his shoulder.

"That's what I thought too" Unsub said and threw Reid away "We shall began now. The first step is breaking you" He pointed at Reid.

"Control your urges of protecting her and you will almost be freeing yourself from her magical curse" He went on with his rubbish. Reid gulped down thinking what "breaking" him could result in. He knew.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Steps towards Cold Hell **

**REID Point of View (POV)**

Oh, how much I wished I was not here, being part of his crazy fantasies. I felt helpless at his hands. I sat there on the floor staring at the walls when Unsub walked back in holding a sweater in his arms. Not to define it precisely but it was covered in dry blood. He tossed it over to me and it landed right on top of my head blocking my vision. I quickly shoved it away. It almost felt like a haunted piece of cloth.

"You can thank me later, William knows best for you" Unsub startled me with his incoherent sentences.

Before I got the chance to say something, he pulled me up by my arm. I was not ready to broken yet. I knew his torturous way studying intensively the victims that were brought upon us the last few days. I quickly started to panic but tried my best not to display it to anyone in the room. He dragged me out of the room and walked over to another room with an air tight door. My mind overthinking what was awaiting me but I lost at my mind's game, I tried to calm myself.

The door flew open as fog of cold air made its way out to my skin almost ticklish at first. The room was a life size freezer with compact molecules of air making it almost visible to the eye. What have I got myself into? William pushed me inside and I fell to the floor, feeling the frozen surface for the first time. I turned quickly.

"William, please don't do this" I pleaded before he threw the same sweater back at me. The door closed with such force that basicular membrane of my ear shivered up. Before, I had time to manage my thought processes the door released again to let Emily in.

"Remember, I am watching. You are not to help her at any time or you will pay the consequences like me" William spoke directly eyeing me. Emily stayed on her hands and knees until the fanatic man left us cold.

"Hell man!" Emily hovered over the corner to rest on her back.

"He is completely delusional, we knew that before" I told her.

"Reid, how long can we take it?" Emily asked keeping her eyes shut.

"Amm, basically hemostasis negative feedback control will trigger as soon as thermo receptors in epithelial cells detect the change. That would probably be few minutes but then the increasing rate of change will overpass the internal parasympathetic control resulting in vasodilation of major arteries. Tissues receiving less blood flow start to become more prone to frostbite but this process-"

"REID! How long?" Emily interrupted in the middle.

"At maximum 5 hours" I tried to be conventional this time.

"GOD!" Emily exhaled. I felt sudden sadness listening to her voice. My answer made her even more miserable than before. I could have lied to her instead or told us we can withstand this for days so she could at least light up a bit.

"Emily, are you feeling cold?" I asked when I saw her rubbing her shoulders. She tilted her head back against the wall and turned her face toward me. She just stared at me for a while she was thinking about something, something related to me. She smiled. I smiled back at her. A-W-K-W-A-R-D.

"Not as cold as you Genius" She finally spoke up releasing the panic in me "You are literally shaking already". I shifted the attention to my body's trembling pattern with the cold.

"Hmm, cold gets to me faster; it's the Las Vegas effect" I explained. Emily kept staring, fixing her eyes on the show my trembling body was putting on. That involuntary response drowned me in embarrassment. Make it stop somehow! I hated when my body betrayed me at those critical moments. Let me once show the strength of a man.

"It is colder than I actually perceived" I let out trying to distract Emily off my body to my words.

"Just hope the team gets to us fast before our bones freeze" She said smiling at me. I nodded.

Although, I was wearing undershirt, fitted shirt and my sweater vest, the multi-layers still didn't act as good cold barrier. The icy cold floor, wall and air all felt like needle to any exposed skin of mine, my hand, neck and face. I could rely on my own heat producing method, burning up those ATPs inside of me. I can run around the room if it went out of control but for now I wanted to focus on William and how to tackle his delusions down.

"Reid" Emily called me off my bodily check points thoughts.

"Yes"

"Why did he perceive me and you as a couple and not Morgan and me?' Emily's question caught me off guard. Maybe Unsub could sense some reality here. I smiled little inside not displaying any of it on my face.

"I don't know, I am not the Unsub" I tried to brush off the question aside.

"Maybe William doesn't accept inter-racial relationships" Emily answered herself.

"Can't rule out on this possibility but he seems well determined and to him he's the most logical and helpful guy ever" I added.

"Which makes us talking him down useless but we can't just let me do whatever he wants with us" She looked away towards the ceiling. The frosty walls were covered with frozen ice; Emily's shirt damped with water from behind the wall.

The cold surrounding just send shiver down my spine again. My whole body jerked in response. I crumpled myself more to prevent more heat loss. Teeth clattering added on my misery as my body's defense started to fight off the cold. By now, all I could think about was the cold, the cold and the cold slowly creeping up from my feet. Why must I be this way?

Even, Emily was shivering now shifting positions here and there to avoid as much contact with the cold around as possible.

"Re-eid, a-a-an-yy way to beat th-this cold down?" Emily's voice cracked down as she fought with cold to speak to me.

"Exercise" I exclaimed. She shook her head and continued shivering. This was just getting worse and worse with each passing minute frosting the epithelial level painfully all over slowing the responsiveness in us as well.

…

**EMILY POV**

What have I got myself into? Mom always told me this job is nothing more but tangling with dangers at every corner and at that moment my sole life purpose was to defeat the cold. My body was aching from earlier beats by William on top the cold was just peeling my bones down.

Reid sat on his folded knees right across from me without any support on his back. His hair damped with icy moisture casing his forehead making it hard to see his eyes. His lips were slowly turning his favourite purple shade. It had been more than two hours that we were freezing in here. The shivering too stopped as it wasn't effective anymore. Breathing was getting difficult with air so dense and each breath send down shivers. In simple words, it was awfully painful. Just then, the door opened and William stepped in smiling as he walked over to Reid.

"You look very cold boy?" He asked the obvious and picked up the sweater he earlier thrown in. He placed the sweater on Reid's shoulders.

"You forgot about this, I left it here just for you" William softly whispered in his ear making it hard for me to even hear. Reid abruptly threw the sweater aside offending the Unsub.

"I don't need it! Let us out of here already"! Reid yelled.

"I don't mean to hurt you like this?" William sadly said making me disgusted with his changing tones.

"But you are!" Reid spoke loudly again.

"Pain is inevitable, no one learns any lesson without it" William whispered again and Reid backed off.

"I don't need any advice from you please let us go now" Reid said in an annoyed tone.

"Not until you learn your lesson"

"I am not learning anything other than how to deal with this cold and I don't presume you intend to teach me basic human physiology here" Reid loudly exclaimed causing William to swiftly clench Reid's face in his strong hand.

"You seem tough, looks could be this deceiving I never imagined" William grinded his teeth.

"I gotta to up the level a bit for you" William dug his fingers on the sides of Reid's jaw. My heart started to pound. Where was the team? What is taking them so long to track us? All the clues were there in the SUV, the struggle, the fight, our guns, the bullet…come on already.

Lost in my hopeful thoughts I didn't even realize that William was walking over towards me. I fisted in anger.

"Take your shoes and socks off, NOW!" He ordered me.

"NO!" I rejected.

"I am going to just tell you one more time, take your shoes and socks off" He spoke slowly this time. I was not going to give up for him.

"No means no!" I cleared my voice and refused. He gave me a hard stare thinking I will get scared; such a cowardly thought. All of sudden, he reacted fast scaring the real hell out of me this time stepping over to Reid. No!

He lifted him up by pulling his hair. Reid ached in pain and voluntary stood off to support some weight off. In no time, William punched his face forcefully dropping him back down.

"Take them off!" He yelled back to me and launched a kick right in between his ribs.

"Stop that" I let out.

"NOW!" William yelled and grabbed Reid's face again to punch it down. Reid ached in pain this time driving me nuts with the guilt. I threw my right shoe off my feet powerfully so it lands near William. I couldn't watch the horror of Reid's beating any longer. William instantly stopped and smashed right Reid's head one final time on the floor before facing me. I threw the other shoe too and took my socks off as well.

"Emily, DON'T!" I heard Reid pleading keeping his injured head down. William ignored and took the items in his hands and walked back to the door and shutting it closed.

Newly exposed skin cried out in pain as it touched the icy floor. I quickly got on my feet and walked over to my fellow agent. I shifted his body so he faced me.

"Are you okay? I am so sorry. If I knew earlier that he would do that then I-" Reid interrupted.

"I am fine" He shifted in a sitting position.

"Why did you give him your shoes, toes take no time to frostbite" He said.

"I couldn't just let him beat you like this" I explained.

"I can take it"

"Why would you do that Reid?" I asked looking at the blood running down his nose.

"For you" Reid shyly let out before finally passing out on the floor.

"REID! REID"


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: William's Natalie**

**MORGAN POV**

Reid fainted, right in front of my eyes. The eyes that were glued to the screen presented in front me. I shifted angrily in the chair I was bound to.

"He needs HELP, MAN!" I yelled to the man standing beside me watching the same horror.

"STOP IT ALREADY, ITS ENOUGH!" I screamed and the whole room echoed.

"Stupid, fake tears, doesn't she realize she is causing all this pain to him?" William spoke lightly fixing his eyes on Emily's face which shredded tears.

"Man, they are NOT a couple! Why don't you understand?" I repeated the same question that I had asked for past few hours.

"What is there that doesn't scream out the obvious, don't fool me" he said looking at me this time.

"Believe me, we are a team, we work together, we stay together, we are like a family and according to our work ethics we are not even allowed to keep any romantic relationships between us. You can let us go and go save a real couple or something." I tried to explain.

"Reid needs my help, I can't just abandon him in the way" William justified.

"Shut the hell up already with your bullshit, Reid is dying in there, what kind of help is that, huh?" I asked.

"This all can end if he learns the lesson" he said.

"What lesson?"

William opened the closet located in the room and took out a blanket. He then walked back to the screen and lifted his remote.

"What lesson?" I yelled again.

"Don't make me kill you" William said before playing with the setting of the freezer room; possibly making it even colder. No man, it was already at -25C. Spare them. He quickly walked back into the freezer door and pulled Emily away from. Then, he nicely wrapped Reid in the blanket after sprinkling some water over his face. They talked. Emily madly yelled something on which William pulled her off to the corner and smashed her in the wall. He yelled out orders to Reid then. What was he making Reid do? I wish I could hear.

William returned and sat down watching the performance again on the screen; the scene where Emily was trembling in pain in the corner and Reid lying still on his back in the middle of the room wrapped in a blanket.

"Natalie is a curse" William sadly, almost breaking in tears said lightly to himself.

Natalie, his girlfriend, his trigger, his love who betrayed him few months ago giving birth to this psychopath. She was missing since that day; I hoped Hotch could find her and bring her to justice in front of William because there was no other way that this guy was surrendering. Few days back we had her discussion in the conference room.

"_Five couples have been found dead and their bodies dumped in the local parking lots where they were first abducted; each case exactly one week apart" JJ explained the case as we sat down on our seats. _

"_Couples? " Rossi exclaimed almost smiling._

"_Bodies have endured severe torture with female partners with the overkill stabs" Hotch added._

"_So he does his research before abducting them" I assumed. _

"_The exact timing of the deaths suggest that the torture meant or signified something to him" Reid suggested. _

"_A couple is reported missing four days ago abducted from the parking lot of West Cinema Ground" JJ read off her tablet while flipping pictures of them on the screen._

"_So this leaves us with three days, dam" Emily said._

"_Let get going" Hotch ordered "It's a long flight." _

_Back in California, I and Rossi visited the crime scene, the parking lots where the bodies of latest victims were found. The local investigator Allison joined us._

"_Bodies were found four days ago with approximate time of 3am in the morning" Allison told us._

"_This seems like a busy place at this time, it's daring of him to choose this even at night" Rossi eyed the large garbage dump. _

"_So he's brave, not doing it for media attention, he is intentional" I started profiling._

"_He's ritualistic making him delusional" Rossi added._

_The damp site was usual and nothing striked out so we traveled to investigate the bodies ourselves. The head of autopsy showed us the stab marks covering the bodies. _

"_The bodies suffered from frostbites, all fingers and toes are especially affected. All the female bodies had frozen body parts"_

"_So he's much angrier at the female" I told myself. _

"_Certainly, but the stab wounds tell a different story. Here see this, the stab marks are jagged, not straight, not forceful but rather inexperienced, and that's the case with each female brought in" Head told us._

"_How is it possible that he's not evolving or learning after each kill?" Rossi questioned._

"_Marks are every time immature looking, his signature maybe" I answered._

"_Cause of death?" Rossi asked._

"_Loss of blood for females whereas the males have no stab wounds what so ever, the males died of internal poisoning Anticholinergic agent but there is severe beating marks pre-mortem" he explained and further complicating the puzzles. Rossi nodded looking at the male dead body right in front of us. _

_We headed back and Reid and Emily joined us with their information about the victims. Reid entered and launched his unlimited amount of information at us. _

"_Couple 1 were engaged for one year, their wedding due in two months, girl a master student while the guy worked as the commissioner in the local police. Couple 2 also engaged, met each other over the internet, and made for each other as her mother suggested couple 3…." Reid continued and didn't even breathe until all the couples were addressed. _

_Profiling continued and we ran out of time as the day three approached with more bodies. _

"_He's hunting tonight again" Hotch exclaimed before Garcia's call interrupted. _

"_As you earlier asked, I cross-listed all males found in the local radius with newly love affairs a.k.a wedding plans, and there were 35 according to the wedding planner's websites, out of this 29 are marrying out of town and rest are staying back…" Garcia informed._

"_Get to the part!" Hotch ordered._

"_O, yes sir, there is one particular couple registered as William and Natalie whose wedding date has been passed 6 months ago and the data still displays 'pending'." Garcia got to the point._

"_So I searched up Natalie, and she has reported missing around that time, so called the wedding planners they hired, even they have not heard from them since that day, no payments are even paid..." Garcia smiled at the screen as she spoke. _

"_You got an address for William and a picture please" Reid asked right away._

"_Anything for you Genius" Garcia looked up the address and we made our way toward it. Upon reaching there, the place was empty, no sign of life, he was not there since six months. Now, William was missing as well. _

That night, we drove around the city searching for that beast, checking parking lots where he could target another couple. Who knew that couple was going to be Reid and Emily suffering the similar fate in the freezer?

I sat bound, tired of being so restricted cutting time, killing the night. The images of dead bodies morphed into Reid and Emily in my mind and I screamed in agony.

**….. REID POV…**

Coldness could feel so weird, I had never thought. I opened my eyes yet again to discover the world was swaying, I was still dizzy. It wasn't long until I noticed I was wrapped up nicely in a warm blanket protecting me from the frozen world around. I shifted my head in the direction of Emily, her eyes closed, her breathing slow. How could I let that happen? How could I stay warm in the blanket fully clothed and let her feet suffer the immense cold?

I tried to shift in my position trying to unwrap but the uplifting pain in my ribs restricted me to move even an inch.

"Em-Emily?" I called out her name in hope for a response. She sat still against the wall with skin so pale it matched with the icy walls.

"Emily!" I yelled this time. No luck. I gave up on my voice and slowly slithered out of the blanket. My body still too cold to survive but it was lot better than hers. I crawled on my knees over to her. Her face looked so frozen that it made me even colder. I took her hand between my palms and rubbed. Come on friction, help me out here. I continued until Emily started to move a little. I looked down at her feet, her toes turning dark shade of red which slowly will turn blue and then black. How stupid of me, thinking of extremes always?

I got my hands together and rubbed my palms until it felt warm enough. I wrapped my hands around her toes transferring some of the generated heat. This time she hissed.

"Emily?" I called out again.

"Yyyeeessss" She answered with a long dragged tone.

"Can you feel your toes?" I asked pinching her thumb just a little.

"No" She kept her eyes closed but started to move her hand around until it handed right on my shoe. She smiled at the touch.

"I thought he took your shoes too" she said literally drowning me in my guilt-full sea. I suddenly stood up fighting all the stupid urges of pain to get the blanket for her.

"Put your feet in there" I ordered her but she shook her head.

"I can't feel them" She answered back biting her lips. Tension took another height in my body understanding the symptoms. O, sometimes I wished I was not as knowledge as I was. I took in charge and placed the blanket under her feet and then quickly swathed it around.

"Don't make this mistake!" William voice dragged me out from depths of my thoughts. His words were the last thing I wanted to let my ears hear. He stood at the door with arms folded.

"Reid, leave it" Emily warned me pulling my arm a little.

"NO!" I exclaimed "Your toes are frozen; you will lose them forever if I don't" I said.

"Please, don't make him cause any more damage to us now" Emily pleaded.

"Just keep quiet" I told and continued with the wrap ensuring no air could get in. Emily resisted looking at the man standing behind me.

"Reid, this will only portray us a couple" Emily informed me about her fear.

"Let him think that" I answered and heard William coming closer. I couldn't stop knowing the ultimate fate of Emily's toes.

"We are not a couple Reid, stop" Emily loudly spoke so William could hear it too. Her words saddened my lonely heart to depth I couldn't explain.

"Why?" I asked as William's hand touched my shoulder. Emily eyed me with horror upon my request of reason.

"I told you not to help her at any time then why did you fail to do so" William spoke near my ear fueling every bit of anger that ever existed in me.

"I am not playing your games anymore" I told him still holding her feet in my hands.

"You lost yourself, to your urges to protect her" he talked as he was my father, even he wouldn't ever talk to me like that. Emily gulped down listening to his scary voice.

"So what?" I asked and he grabbed my neck from behind slowly squeezing it.

"So this, she wants you to be all ruined, she wants to use you to protect her and her only, can't you see it in her eyes" William ground his teeth as he spoke with so much hatred.

"She will get frostbite if I don't help" I managed to speak despite the neck being clutched.

"Let it happen. This blanket was for you. So blind in love that you risk so much to save her huh?" he asked.

"Leave him, I will unwrapped my feet okay" Emily slowly plead.

"I would still do the same no matter who was in her place. She's a human first and then my love" I told them and then suddenly realized the slip of my tongue sending Emily to cloud nine. I quickly withdrew from the world for few seconds. What did I just confess and that too in front of William?

"This was the first warning, the moment you repeat such an act again your very loud friend outside will be killed and then you can use his blood to warm her." William ordered again leaving me even more helpless this time. I wanted to run away, very far. He let my neck go and quickly took the blanket away to wrap around me again.

"I told you, I DON'T WANT IT!" I had enough with his play and literally yelled throwing the blanket aside.

"Your choice if you want to freeze too" William said the final words and left.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Frozen Death to Melting Life**

… Emily POV …..

"REID, why-" I tried to ask but he stood up before I could continue.

"I don't want to talk" he exclaimed and walked all over to the other side of the room leaving the blanket behind.

"Don't do this to yourself" I requested looking at the most innocent face I ever saw which was very mad at that particular moment. My half frozen body had no energy to even scold him at that time.

"Please, talk to me" I pleaded again demanding some attention but he turned off and curled up his legs to hide his face behind it. I signed deeply and my lungs cried at the entrance of new cold air. I knew my body was giving up and in no time I was about to lose my toes, then feet but would I be able to walk again.

I tilted my head back in helplessness. Suddenly Morgan words brought a smile that I couldn't express with my frozen lips of how Reid was gaga over me. This kid never failed to lighten us up even at such deadly moment. Sitting with nothing else to do, I searched my heart for any feelings for him that I might have. He was very dear to me, like my family, very important and yes I could die to save him from any danger but I would do the same for Morgan or JJ or any other of my team. I knew I was special for him, I was the reason he was sitting across suffering cold inch by inch. But, I had nothing in return to exchange. He was not just the prince charming I was waiting for till today. I wished he could be the one so he can be happy but that's not what I wanted. I signed sadly at the fate of my poor little lover.

That's it! It was more than 5 hours now being in cold. I was totally paralyzed by now. My eyelids couldn't open as they were frozen. My lips were sealed with icy layer in between. It wasn't cold anymore; maybe I couldn't feel anything anymore that's why.

A hot warm jolt travelled up from my feet to my chest, scaring me. Was I losing everything I had in me to this cold? I was totally frozen now, breathing slowing at every breath. Darkness and coldness and silence and loneliness and death all were surrounding me. I'm lost, I said to myself. I didn't want to die. NO, I can't! I want to stay, stay in this world more to see things that are still my dreams. I was not ready. I gathered all my energy left, every ounce to just say the last few words.

"Reid, help I'm dy—ing".

But no one answered, wish I could open my eyes to see where he was. I tried to spot his breathing sounds in the silence but no luck. Was he even here or was he too frozen. The warm jolt started to travel again inside of me as I could feel my blood crystalizing. I didn't know if I could survive this time.

"Die—dy-iing" I said before realizing it was too late. I laid back in my thoughts experiencing how death feels. Those same feels that every single victim I studied experienced. Suddenly I felt some warm breathes near my face.

"Emily, can you hear me. I am right here, stay with me" I heard Reid speaking with such difficulty trying to move his frozen lips and tongue. I felt his hands around me, too hot for my frozen body. I relieved even when dying thinking he was still much warmer so life existed in him.

I felt his body beside me, too close. He wrapped himself around me, too hot to bear. I suddenly started to burn with heat. The warm jolt started to fade as the new heat of Reid's body fought back. Life was coming back, I wanted to cry, cry so hard but even tears were frozen.

I sat there paralyzed with Reid all around me. He had a blanket wrapped us both trapping all of his heat inside. I felt a tiny hope sipping back to rescue me. I felt his cheeks touching my frozen cheeks. He was there for me; losing all his heat for me. How could I let this happen? How can I steal his life out along with mine? I wanted to cry out imagining how this was all ending. But that moment, he was hotter than a burning sun. The sudden pain on my skin uplifted newer storms of agony as I defrosted. I started to melt. I felt some life coming back but too little to make any movement.

Slowly, the heat became less intensified. I knew I was killing him with my coldness. I was stealing everything he was left with. With this guilt torturing the life out of me, I preferred to pass out then to continue on with this remorse.

…**..MORGAN POV….**

For past few hours, I witnessed the worst of humanity. My eyes weeping seeing my two most beloved friends frozen, slowly and painfully dying and I sat there and just stared.

I didn't know how long I could take this anymore. William left an hour ago getting tired of looking at still bodies. In front my eyes, Emily and Reid were fighting the battle with the cold together wrapped in a blanket. I was happy William wasn't here to see this or he would have lashed more torment at them. I wished I could be some help to them, somehow. Fearful tears helplessly washed over my face.

William entered reading the saddest story my face could tell. He jerked right toward the screen angrily staring at them.

"Please, they are dying now" I pleaded like a beggar who had lost everything. William quickly strolled toward the freezer. I saw him pulling the blanket off revealing two frozen lives. My heart melted immensely at that sight. William was going to pay for every second of their misery, I promised to myself.

He pulled Reid out of that room first dragging him out and leaving him near my feet. The sight was even more horrific than in the camera. His hair strands all frozen even eye lashes were frozen in ice. The blood from his nose also iced and cold air vapours steamed out form his body. My heart rate increased suddenly realizing how scary it seemed to look at him. Emily was even worse wearing the sweater vest of Reid on top of the sweater William gave them. I closed my eyes seeing her so lifeless. William was out of breath when done with the work.

"What did you get by doing this you psychopath?" I screeched in pain and asked collecting my tears.

"He still lost!" He madly said "How dare he do it again? He is just like all the others."

"William please" I pleaded for an answer but he kept staring at the thawing bodies on the floor.

"They will have to undergo the punishment now" William exclaimed and left the room. Emily's finger tips were all black and her toes completely frostbitten.

I waited for several hours hoping to see a bit of movement from the melting bodies. I predicted it was afternoon of next day now. The ice was completely gone and now their bodies were big puddle of water and they damped in it. I tried calling their name so I could get some hint of their condition. I wish I was free of these restrictions so I could warm them with loads of clothing. More time passed and I prayed to the atmosphere to quickly warm up my friends.

After several hours, William returned.

"You were after me! You are part of them" William exclaimed suddenly.

"What now?" I asked.

"F-B-I" William slowly said.

"Now you know, we told you hundreds of time already!" I moved my aching muscles a bit as I spoke.

"They are coming again, they spotted the van. I need to change location but only after I am done with them" William talked to himself. He then forcefully kicked Emily jerking her. She responded a little and I could breathe again.

"Get up, lets end this" He grabbed Emily up and she opened her eye to see the room she was in and the puddle of water wetting her.

"Ahhh, what?" She finally spoke and I signed in relief.

"Time to die" William informed her and laughed a little "Natalie you can't run away from me, you will be killed".

"I'm Emily" She lightly voiced again.

"Don't pretend to be someone else now. You can hide your identity from the world but not from me" William took a large knife from his pocket firing every single nerve inside of me. Not now please. He then stumped Reid over and he shifted himself with the new stimuli. He started to cough. He had severe fever as he melted his way to normalcy again.

"Get up, Natalie needs to learn her lesson now" William spoke to Reid still coughing a little. A cracked from another room rocked all of us. It triggered William all of sudden to run out of the room. Strange behaviour at its peak

"Emily, how are you feeling?" I asked as she lay back down.

"Morgan I survived" She let out in desperation.

"Come on, we can do this, I heard the team is on their way" I tried to feed them some hope.

"Reid, talk to me if you hear me" I asked to the body lying in my feet. He shifted until he directly faced me, all wet and broken.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Love Conquers All**

"I can hear you" Reid spoke and life returned to me fully.

"Try to get up pretty boy" I asked another favour and he tried his best to fulfill it. It took him some time before he stood on his knees and placed his hands on my hand bound to the chair. His hands still so cold, it hurt.

"Please do" I nodded and he untied my hands and stared at the deep marks left by their existence. His eye became even sad as he completely freed me. The moment I was free I tightly hugged him, something I wanted to do for such long time. His wet clothes made me wet too but he was with me, in my arms, all alive and breathing. The hug lasted for few minutes filled with my desperation and his agony.

"I am here too" Emily mocked still placed on the floor.

"I am not done yet" I smiled and happily continued the hugs until I felt he was out of breathe. I let his damp slim body stabilize itself. He smiled before I moved toward Emily and hugged her back to life too. I knew the consequences when William will discover me this way but I had no fear.

"Melting was worse than freezing" Reid exclaimed as we sat on the floor facing each other again. I grabbed Emily hand, the fingers so discoloured with the frostbite.

"Hands down" Emily agreed to him. I was happy they were back to me, to the world, to their lives. But not for too long.

"Guys I was literally dying out here watching the hell break down" I told them my side of the story.

"He made you watch it too?" Reid asked in amazement, his voice still too weak. I returned a nod.

"So what now?" Emily asked us boys.

"Either we wait for the team to arrive soon while getting tormented by William" I suggested

"Or we can plan an escape out" Reid finished for me.

"I rather choose the second option. Let see William wants to punish Natalie. He sees her in all female victims, transference so he makes sure they suffer max pain" Emily added.

"He also tortures the male victims along with them so they can feel the pain he felt with Natalie" I reasoned out.

"So only way he will stop is either Natalie dies or Male partner wins over the female" Emily threw out some words of thoughts.

"That's it!" Reid excitedly snapped his fingers. Both of us hopefully looked into Genius' eyes which flickered with eagerness.

"If the male partner betrays the female before she does it, this could serve as victory for him, meaning all we have to do is make him believe that Emily is betrayed rather than me and that might provide some loop hole out" Reid went on.

"Good thought but difficult to peruse as William got some really crazy plans" I said.

"He makes the male partner stab the females that is why those marks were so immature every time. It was not just his signature" Reid exclaimed.

"And presents the male with poison but they drink it on their will too. As they choose to die with their partner" Emily concluded.

"But then he's not the killer of either" I wondered.

"Smart way of indirect murder" Emily added.

"He's too weak to do such an act himself. That's why he blames himself for every ruin he suffered. We can help stimulate a victory for him" Reid suggested. This kid got some hope jogging back into us but how long we had before William returned. Something was totally wrong, the way he suddenly went out, like he remembered something or maybe to make sure of something his mind just warned him of. Whatever it was, it gave us some time to think straight.

Emily closed her eyes for a while to deceive a plan in her head. I stole a moment to stare at her ruined fingers and toes. Anger started to build inside me. My sweet friend lost such precious part of her body for some psycho's delusion. The limit of tolerance in me started to over flow as I continued staring at the frostbite, haunting me, scaring me. I noticed Reid was also looking at me. Our eyes met and I saw the guilt swimming in his eyes, the most innocent eyes I ever laid my eyes on. Aggression inside me reached another height almost blinding me with revenge. I was free, I could tackle William if he enters now, and I could take him down in an instance. I stood up and walked over to the closed door and waited for any sounds from the other side. I could hear footsteps, more than one. Were more people there than William? Was my team here?

"There may be more people here" I informed my friends. Emily flicked her eyes open.

"Should we make some noise to let them know" Emily asked. I loudly bounced the door and kicked it few times filling the whole room with sudden noises.

"HELP!" I screamed as I continued to lash at the door.

In few moments, the door fling opened with such power that I fell back down on the floor. I landed right on my head blackening the world around me. I lost all stimuli from my world.

**REID POV…..**

William Stood at the door holding the large knife in his hand. His eyes were furiously focused on Morgan. He was tensed and afraid. He shifted his gaze on me and the silver blade shined right in my eye. William kept staring at me like he was deciding something in his head. I wish I could decode his every nerve impulse to my advantage. I waited for William to initiate talking.

"Your bastard team is here …not to save you but to gather your dead bodies" William finally lashed out and without any further notice stabbed Morgan right into the leg with the knife. Morgan, unconscious made no response to sudden intrusion in his blood vessels as blood sprout right onto William's face and clothes. Emily couldn't gulp her scream down like me and resulting in antagonizing the Unsub further on. I could hear my team's footstep near us now. They were here. I knew William had no chance left but to kill us before he is ultimately defeated. He wasn't going down easy.

He took the large knife out from Morgan's body and with such fast pace shifted his stance toward Emily. His eyes full of hatred as he eyed his Natalie and my Emily. He was deadly with his strike. She held no chance against him. Every muscle in my body ached to take William down before he takes her away. I had enough suffering. I was stronger than he imagined and I stood and grabbed the chair Morgan was placed in. I could still feel some part of my body frozen weakening me further.

Before William could stab her more I smashed the chair right on his head throwing him aside. His knife threw off in the opposite direction while the chair on the other side breaking in many pieces. I ran after the knife but he grabbed my ankle just before I could get my hands on the weapon. I fell forward and he quickly crushed me with his weight shifting over me. He tried to grab my arms but I my frozen blood was now boiling with adrenaline and I punched his nose on the right place to knock him out of conscious for a while.

"REID!" I heard Emily scream my name. I threw him off my body and grabbed the knife before I knew William was back bleeding, he pulled on my leg sliding me toward him. He was completely unaware that now I was equipped with the knife. As I came closer, I launched my first stab right on his chest. He screamed in agony and let go my leg. With furious anger, he clutched the broken leg of the chair and smashed my head with bruising force throwing me off my stance for a while.

"You cannot save Natalie!" William yelled like an animal before hitting my head again, this time blood made its way out wetting my forehead. My vision blurred but I attacked William again this time throwing all my body weight down on him and we both landed on the floor with a loud bang. He wrapped his arms around me restraining my movement completely. He tightly squeezed the life out of my and I had no option left but to stab his face which was inches away from mine. The knife pierced threw his face and the furious side of me even startled me as I continued to injure his face more.

"Love conquers all" I whispered in his ear before I completely lost every single drop of energy in me and collapsed on top of now still body.

**EMILY POV….**

The horror broke right in of my eyes. I had no life to aid the fight as now both lied together in bloody bath.

"FBI" Hotch's voiced brought tears to my already soaked eyes. He finally entered the room witnessing the scene with gun pointing directly at the Unsub shielded with Reid's body. Rossi quickly followed with JJ and many Swat members quickly taking over the room. JJ rushed toward me. Her face disgusted with the scene around. Without any spoken words, she lifted me off and I shifted all my weight over her shoulder. I walked past the mess of bloody bodies. My foot was just inches away from Reid's bloody hand still holding the knife. The hand seemed so lifeless. I stopped and kneeled down.

"Emily, please we need to get you out of here" JJ placed her hand over my shoulder to comfort me. Nothing could ever comfort me now. Tears sprout out of my eyes like a fountain. I couldn't take my eyes off that hand, such powerful yet so weak now. JJ this time pulled me up and I continued my crying over her shoulder. There was William at one side of this world killing ladies to destroy love and then there was Spencer Reid fighting for a lady to give love another life in this world. I couldn't take the pain I gave Reid any longer and quickly ran out of the room into the paramedics eagerly waiting for us. The paramedics quickly took over me and I laid flat on the stretcher as they moved toward the ambulance. After many days, I was seeing the sky over me, blue and clam. It drastically had the calming effect all over me. So much had occurred that I felt finally saved under the arms of creamy sky watching me crying.

The sky was soon replaced by ceiling of the ambulance. I stayed still ignoring all the medical procedures being done now. I closed my eyes and was shocked to see a smiling face of Reid right in front of my eyes. His smile so warm so intoxicating, I felt even calmer knowing he was fine. I took another breathe deeply this time reminding every cell of my body that Reid was the one granted us another chance to breathe to survive to live. From the cold hell to bloody well, he saved me. I had all my answers right in front of me. He proved all my points wrong. I was even guiltier now. I shifted my mind toward searching for the same smile again but it was getting dark, really dark. I needed to see that smile again, now! The blackness inside my mind slowly engulfed the soothing smile.

…


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: Life of its Own**

**Morgan POV…**

I opened my eyes and whiteness replaced blackness, laughter replaced silence, pain replaced the ease I was in. Slowly, the world started to return to me. I realized I was lying, in a hospital gown, healing.

"Morgan dear, finally I get to see your eyes" Garcia's words provided the instant comfort I needed in that moment.

"Hi baby girl" I answered hearing my own voice feel so weak.

"It's going to be all good. I can't wait to get back already" She came closer this time and filled my visionary fields with her bubbly outlook. All the colors reflecting off her just sent happy vibration through me.

"When did you come?" I inquired since she was supposed to be back in Virginia.

"It's been almost 5 days now; I came the moment I heard you three were missing. I needed to help" She said while smiling.

"How are Reid and Emily?" I quickly asked. I was worried, disgusted as the thoughts slowly returned, the scenes of freezing, the torments. I started to shiver remembering how cold Reid's hand felt against my skin when he untied me.

"Recovering" Garcia answered.

"How bad were they?" I asked. I wanted to know more, the extent of their injuries, how long would it take for them to heal, physical, mentally. I was eager and sad at the same time. Just then I noticed JJ's presence in the room as well. I looked over her with questioning eyes.

"Emily has few stab wounds, dehydration and frostbite at her fingers and toes. Reid has minor internal injuries with a head concussion but no sign of frostbite. They are already getting better as we speak" She informed.

"And you seem to have an injured leg" Garcia spoke in an innocent tone.

"Is Emily going to be fine?" I asked JJ directly.

"Doctors are trying their best to save as many digits as possible for her; the frost is severe at the tips. Nothing can be said right now." JJ answered as I digested all the facts.

"Where's William?" I inquired the moment that monster's face popped into my head. Garcia flinched at my words.

"He's dead. Reid had him before we could strike" JJ proudly exclaimed "Morgan, you need to rest now; we can deal with the questions later".

"Yes darling, please calm down" Garcia added. How could I calm down after witnessing such horror? I admit, I had seen worse but this was about my own friends.

"When can I get to see them?" I questioned and JJ smirked.

"Another question?" She raised her eyebrows as she mocked. I nodded.

"Soon, right now you need to focus on your recovery" JJ came over and took my hand in her hand gently pressing it. I signed deeply.

"You could've come earlier" I barely let out. JJ's smile transitioned into guilt. She turned her eyes away; underneath her gaze I could see her blaming herself. Some moments later she faked a smile and left the room to let others know. I continued to recover.

The next day was pretty boring as Hotch and Rossi paid their visit in the morning and left afterwards with Garcia behind who babbled all day long from fairy tales to cyber hacking. I agree she kept me busy distracting me from horrible thoughts of William's psychosis. The wound on my leg was not so deep; it was the head injury that made me uncomfortable. Doctors told me I could get discharge in two days if I continued the same pattern of recovery. I couldn't wait. At night before oozing off to sleep, JJ updated us on Reid's condition. He was awake and had no memory of how he actually tackled William down. The head lash left its scare in his eidetic memory. I didn't get to see him but I heard he was fine and eagerly waiting to get out of this place.

The next day was much better as I got my discharge papers signed and actually got to see Reid. As I entered his room, he was laying on his side staring outside the window. His forehead was all covered in white bandages and his bangs nicely placed on top of it. Other than few bruises on his face and lips, he seemed alive and okay.

"How's my boy doing, huh?" I asked and he quickly shifted toward me presenting a bright smile.

"I am more than good" He answered cheerily. I frowned as his voice and his physical condition didn't match very well. He must be in some sort of pain but he looked very content. I was expecting some form of traumatic effects. I smiled back at his contagious smile.

"Good to know that" I commented and he lifted himself into a sitting position.

"You're having difficulty walking there" he asked eyeing the cane in my hand supporting half off my weight from my injured leg. I nodded.

"For a while but it's not as bad as it looks" I said. Garcia was standing beside me looking at Reid like he was a new piece in an art gallery.

"We need to get together fast, I miss my team already" She said as she sat on the bed beside Reid.

"Don't you wanna know about Emily?" I asked him. He looked up confused at first and then smiled.

"I already did ask JJ. I am happy frost bite wasn't as bad as it appeared" He answered "but I haven't seen her yet"

"You need to stay for another day or two before they start negotiating your discharge" I replied to Reid's questioning eyes. I knew what he wanted to ask. He rolled his eyes and Garcia laughed it off.

…..

I finally got home after such long time, even though it was only few days but it seemed like hundreds of years past by facing William. Healing is always harder to achieve after the torment is done. I put my cane away and sat down on my sofa and turned the TV on. I felt good to be finally back and alive. If William wanted he would have killed me but he didn't. Was I really lucky like Reid always saying? I couldn't hold back my smile thinking how protective Reid was for Emily during the whole adventure with William. But Emily's early interest level was barely enough to make him proud.

I sat back smiling at my friends and their adorable ways lighting my world around. The next day, doctor visited to check on my wound.

"Getting better there Morgan, luckily the cut only penetrated the muscle and not any bones. In few days, you can start walking on your own" Dr. Adam played around with his papers and told me the good news. I smiled.

"Which means I can join my team next week" I told myself and the doctor smirked. He patted my shoulder before getting up to leave.

"Hmm, Dr. Adam How's Emily doing?" I asked as we headed toward the door.

"I heard she recovered consciousness yesterday and is feeling better. The internal injuries take time but nothing life-threatening, she'll back before you know" Dr. Adam said the final words and left.

Garcia popped herself in my house the next day and dragged me out for some fresh air walk. I couldn't refuse seeing her adorable plea. It was misty and cloudy early morning. We walked together discussing life in general. We dropped in Starbucks to grab some early morning coffee. We sat on the table sipping in the hot beverage when Garcia suddenly got very eager to discuss a party that they were planning for long.

"Okay, so Rossi wants a family reunion party at his place this weekend and guess who's in charge of everything" she started talking.

"O mama, none other than my baby girl" I answered to her delight and she jumped in her seat.

"Finally all our team together to celebrate a night with fun, games, food, drinks and…a… there is a surprise as well" She winked after finishing her sentence. I smiled in returned.

"Can't wait to see what my lady got in store for us" I said.

"I see. Well Emily returns home this Friday so she can definitely come over on Saturday night, she got few days to recover" Garcia went on talking "which reminds me that I need to call someone and o yes… I have to leave now as well" She opened her eyes wide open and then her mouth "I remember I have to go somewhere, its party related. I'll meet yeah around then" Garcia got up and lifted her purse to leave. She quickly hugged me before leaving me and my coffee alone for a while. I started to make mental notes of today's plan. I had to see Emily and then Skype chat with mom. She was desperate to see me. I took my new phone that Hotch gave me yesterday after William destroyed the older one and speed dialled Reid's number.

"Good morning Pretty Boy!" I said as the line got picked up.

"Hi Morgan" He answered in the sleepiest tone possible.

"Are you still in bed?"

"Hmmm…"

"It's 11 already"

"I slept in late after coming back from hospital- was tired of lying down" Reid answered.

"O I see, so what's your plan for today?" I asked the sleepy boy.

"Hmm, nothing, just want to stay home"

"I was planning to meet Emily at the hospital, I thought you wanna join"

"No, I want to stay home for today!" He answered with irritation this time.

"Is everything okay Reid?"

"So If I refuse to go with you, it means there's something wrong" Reid talked even more annoyed than before. He must have a hard time sleeping to get up so crabby in the morning.

"O…OO, chillax! Don't need to get cranky here with me. Just go back to sleep. Talk to you later" I put my phone down to see the shop was filling up as noon was approaching. I took my cane and lifted myself up to get home, shower and then go meet Emily.

…**.REID POV…**

I put my phone back to the side table and shifted back under my blanket. He just called me cranky. He had no idea what hell I was feeling right now. I hid my face under my blanket and let my tears wipe my face down. How do I tell him what I was experiencing? How do I say that the whole night I stayed awake trying to ignore the voices? The constant whispering in my ears driving me insane, even the loud music had no effect. How do I tell him I was terrified, scared and lonely the whole night waiting for sun to finally rise? As the sun rose, the whispering stopped and I fell asleep like a dead.

Talking to them about this would only make this worse. I knew I had to absorb all my fears and tears myself. It wasn't the voices that scared me, I was very familiar with them since childhood but they only appeared once in a month or so. Now, the increasing frequency was alarming. The clear voices that I assumed were my imaginary friends talking were now turning into low whispers making no sense.

I threw my blanket away along with my thoughts. I got up to find the intense headache was still there. How hard did William hit me, the pain never went away since then? The moment I tried to stand the whole world around me swayed like I was in a ride. I fell back to the bed and sat at the edge for few minutes. The floor kept moving here and there gradually slowing down until it finally stopped. I stood again and discovered that I was again dizzy but I kept walking and swaying to reach my doorframe that I completely lost my balance and fell backward on the floor. My already injured head went on fire after hitting the floor again. I ached as intense headache started to travel down my spine. They told me I needed to stay in hospital for at least two more days but I was sick being held at one place. I managed to talk my way out then but now I was lying helplessly on my floor.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: The Play of Rain **

**I am very thankful to all the readers for reading this despite that I am not as good in writing as others but I am trying and your appreciation is doing wonders. Thanks again and Enjoy. **

…**Emily POV…**

_The cold was like a creepy monster surrounding me from all corners, the cold fog blinding me. I was running with frozen legs. I knew I was back to where I started but I wanted to run in hope I might find a way. The monster was chasing me, slowing engulfing me inside the cold, dark hole where I couldn't even hear myself scream. I was dying but that face, that smile, that warmth echoed in my mind, I desperately wanted to hold on that image, forever freeze that look in my eyes, it was my life, I wanted that smile again, again, now, now….please…._

I fling open my eyes finding the same old hospital room residing me. I was sweating and breathing faster. The nightmare was now becoming my routine. It always accompanied my sleep. I was freaking tired of being on that bed. I held my hand up high until I could see it. All my fingers were covered in bandages protecting the exposed tips after surgically frostbite was removed. JJ and my mother kept me company but I was still restless. I wanted to meet Morgan and Reid just to make sure they were alright.

Finally, this afternoon Morgan entered my room hiding his face behind the white rose's bunch he held in my hands. I smiled seeing him all happy in front of me.

"How's my girl doing?" Morgan took a seat beside my bed after placing the flowers in my lap. They looked fresh and the scent took me to another world for a moment.

"You like' em right?" His voiced pulled me back to my world. I stared back at him realizing how lucky I was having him here with me.

"I love them" I answered "Thank you" Morgan shyly smiled and grabbed my hand.

"Emily, we are worried about you. Please get better fast, we miss you already" He said.

"I am good. How's my man doing there with that leg?" I asked pointing to his injured leg.

"It's healing fast, not a deep wound though" he answered.

"William scared the hell out of me when he stabbed you there-" I talked but Morgan stopped me in the middle "We are not wasting our time talking about what that bastard did to us. He's not worth it". Silence fell between us for few minutes.

"I thought Reid would visit too" I commented.

"Our boy Genius needs his beauty sleep; he was all cranky when I called him in the morning" Morgan said. I nodded and smiled imagining Reid peacefully sleeping on his bed with a smile that could melt ice. I wish I could see that smile again.

"He needs his time adjusting I guess" Morgan said before my mother entered the room.

"Well, hello there Agent Morgan!" mom greeted him before praising the flowers he just got for me.

"How's Dr. Reid doing? I think he was discharged yesterday right?" Mom asked.

"He doing pretty good as well, he got home yesterday but still on bed rest for another week."

"I heard he gave a tough fight to that criminal to save you and Emily" Mom spoke. Morgan signed before answering.

"Our kido is not as vulnerable as he looks. He knew the situation well to attack. We are all thankful for that." Morgan answered. General conversation started between them and I sat there replaying the fight Reid gave to William in my mind. I remembered how his voice cracked when he told William that love conquers all. Did he really meant what he said that time, was that comment for me or was he just taking revenge from the Unsub? Whatever it was I was now official fan of his bravery. Morgan soon left and promised to return tomorrow with Reid. I was eagerly waiting to see him and that haunting smile of his. I slept that night again going through the same nightmare, fighting cold, fighting death and trying to chase that smile for miles and miles…

**Morgan POV…..**

I wasn't calling the Kid anymore, I tried enough but he seemed to not pick up. Finally I gave up on calling and in the morning got myself to his apartment. It was raining lightly wetting all the streets. I parked in his parking place and took out the bags from passenger seat. I brought in some good food for him.

I walked up to his place and knocked. There was no response. I knocked again, louder this time. With time, nervousness started to kick in with bad thoughts bathing my mind. Was something wrong in there? This time I planned to kick the door open. I placed the bags on the floor and backed off just to hit the door with full force. That very instant the door opened and my strong kick landed right onto Reid's stomach. Losing my balance from injured leg, we both fell on the floor crushing each other's body. I quickly got up from top of Reid and sat aside holding my aching leg.

"AHHH! Man that was some bad, bad timing!" I sat and gave him space to get up.

"You hit me very hard" Reid said in an agonized tone and went outside to get my cane back for me. He extended his hand and I took it to pull myself back on my feet. I took the cane and walked over to the couch. He came back inside with the bags closing the door behind him.

"Why weren't you opening the door, I knocked forever" I said relaxing my head back. He went into the kitchen leaving me behind noticing his place. It seemed like many battles were fought here, books everywhere on the floor in different positions with clothes hanging here and there.

"What happened out here?" I asked as he appeared back. Even he resembled hell, hairs not combed properly and only loose clothes covering him. At my question, he only gulped and sat across me.

"Are you going to say something or not?" I asked again.

"What do you want me to say?" Reid asked looking away.

"Explain this mess and then yourself?" I demanded.

"I was kinda sick, I'll clean the mess when I feel better" Reid simply summarized his last few days.

"If you needed help, you couldn't called me or at least attended one of the thousands calls I made or texted me" I started out.

"My phone is not charged" Reid answered still looking away.

"I should call in a doctor then" I said and took my phone out, Reid flinched.

"There's no need for that Morgan" Reid panicked.

"Seriously kid, you clearly need help, the decision to discharge you yet wasn't right." I said.

"No, I don't need it. I am fine; I'm tired that's all. I can rest and it will be better I'm sure." Reid spoke in fast.

"Come on don't be stubborn now" I said while dialling Dr. Adam. Reid forcefully snatched the phone away from hands.

"NO, means NO!" He yelled this time ending the dialling.

"REID! What's wrong with you! You're not picking up my call, you're cranky, mean and yelling for no reason. And now that I want to help you, you got problems with that too!" I raised my voice and he sat back down bowing his head. Silence fell between us, an awkward one. I suddenly felt guilty yelling at him when he's not in his normal state. His face tensed as sadness radiated from it.

"Look kid, I am sorry but I need to know what's bothering you" I politely asked, he lifted his head to face me.

"I am sorry for snapping at you like this" He apologized.

"You know you can't hide anything from me" I said. He faintly smiled.

"I just need time" Reid said.

"Is it William?" I asked and he shook his head.

"Then it is Emily?" I asked cautiously.

"Why would you ask that?" Reid asked confusedly.

"Well William had you two be a couple, you must've felt awkward. Then all his words, false lessons, I mean you do realize he was all just a pyscho." I softly said.

"I know it was hard to hear him say all those ugly things" he agreed.

"Then there were your feelings for Emily, they may have got into the case bothering you. You shouldn't worry about that now" I claimed. He bit his lower lip at my words.

"Once or twice, such foolish words escaped my mouth. I wished I could get them back. Just imagine what she might have thought about me. I was so embarrassed afterwards." Reid explained.

"O come on, you know she didn't mind it" I said.

"It was just so inappropriate for the situation. I'm still mad at myself"

"You were her hero there baby" I teased while smiling "how in the world can she mind this?" Reid smiled with me.

"Still she must've thought I'm crazy" He replied.

"She knows why you said what you said" I finally let out and he looked up at me with amazement.

"Hhmm?" Reid eyed me.

"I kinda told her before we got captivated by William" I said. Reid became even more confused.

"What? What did you tell her?" He asked abruptly.

"Your real feelings for her" I answered and he stood up all angry.

"WHAT THE HELL, Morgan?" he asked loudly.

"I knew you could never build enough courage to say it yourself so I did it for you" I explained myself.

"REALLY?" Reid yelled this time.

"I didn't expect you to get this mad"

"Morgan, who gave you the right to advertise my feelings like this?"

"Hey, chillax-"

"SHUT UP MORGAN" Reid's sudden anger shocked me. His face was all flushed out. I didn't know he never wanted to tell her that.

"I trusted you and in return I get this. I shouldn't have done that, such imprudent of myself" Reid softly said this time biting his lips. Then I saw him blinking his tears away. I descended another level in my guilt.

"Reid, I had no idea that-"

"Enough with your explanation! That whole time she knew what I meant, why did you do that?" He let out sadly staring at my with his innocent eyes demanding answers that I had not.

"Sorry I didn't-"

"Sorry doesn't bring time back!" Reid yelled again.

"Kid, you need to calm down." I said.

"DON'T call me that. My name is Spencer Reid!" He spoke with no emotion in his tone. I had never seen our genius this angry before. I gave up talking and he too sat back down on his place. He covered his face with his hands. He was hurt and betrayed by his very trusted friend. What if he asked for her reply? I remember how lightly she took those feeling and laughed off saying he was not her type. I was becoming more ashamed as silence continued to dwell between us. Reid sat still hiding his face. I got up and walked over to his side. I grabbed both his wrist and pulled them away from his face to find tears falling off his cheeks. He resisted but I pulled harder.

"Let go!" He pulled backed his writs but I had them in control.

"You haven't even met her yet to see how she's craving to tell you how proud she is, so stop wasting these precious tears of you" I said but he kept his eyes low.

"I am not crying because of her" He barely spoke.

"Then for who pretty boy…" I asked squeezing his wrist gently emphasizing my point.

"YOU!" He screamed before forcefully pulling his wrist out of my grip "I am done talking here so kindly leave me alone now"

"Reid, I didn't come here to leave this early, I got all the food that we can eat together then go meet Emily and clean this mess as well" I protested.

"I don't need you anymore" Reid stood up and moved away from me.

"I get it that you're mad but come on there's no point in it" I said.

"I am done with you, please, please, please leave me!" Reid pleaded insanely. My world fell apart hearing those words leaving his mouth. I took my cane in my hand and stared back at those eyes that looked dead. He must be very exhausted but I never wanted to leave him alone at this state. I had to stay here, take care of him. He needed someone.

"Please, let me stay here for a while, I want to help" I requested.

"I am not helpless" He snapped.

"What if I say I won't go no matter what?" I exclaimed. Reid looked at me again wiping his tears away with his sleeve and walked over, grabbed me with my arm and gently started to pull me toward the door.

"Reid, this is very rude of you, REID!" I said realizing how determined he was this time. He swung me outside the door and went back inside for a while bringing all the food bags back and placed them in my hand. Tears started to wet my eyes, why was he doing this to me.

"Reid, please!" I said before he stood in the doorframe looking all betrayed.

"It takes a lifetime to build it but only a moment to break"

"Give me one last chance" I pleaded as he slowly started to close the door.

"Broken things can never be put back together"

He closed the door. It wasn't only the door he closed, he closed himself away from me; he didn't throw me out of his place but out of his life. I stood there, waiting he might open the door again. I knew he was exhausted, tired, sick and now mad but it was all so quick. I left the bags there and walked back into the rain.

…


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: Fallen Storm**

**Reid POV….**

I rushed to my window and saw he was struggling while walking down the parking to get to his car. He was slow, drenching in rain. His cane splashing in the puddles as he got to this car slowly opened the door and one last time looked at my window. I quickly moved back sitting down on the floor underneath it.

He left me all alone to deal with the mess I was in. I was hurt beyond repair feeling so foolish now thinking back how I acted in front of her. Never in my worst nightmare had I thought he will break my trust like this. I felt so broken and heavy on heart.

_Morgan was never trustworthy._

I looked up to see who just whispered this to me. No one was here in my sight. I closed my eyes and the voice got clearer.

_You are nothing but a kid to them, something that can be played with anytime they're bored. _

"That's not true. Morgan said he did this only because he thought I would never do it myself" 

_He thinks you are weak and loser. They act as if they own you and today he just claimed that he even owns your feelings too!_

I opened my eyes trying to ignore what my other part of mind was whispering. I was tired beyond words with that voice. I wanted to tell Morgan today that I was suffering but it wasn't worth it anymore. He would go tell someone this too. I got up to the kitchen making myself another cup of coffee. Nothing seemed to go down my throat but this.

_Emily must have laughed at you so much. _

I poured the hot coffee down in my cup. I pour loads of sugar down thinking how it relieved the voices for a while.

_She must be disgusted knowing you liked her, a crazy socio-awkward kid! _

I walked over to my bed taking out the sleeping pills. The only way to shut down completely was if I sleep. I took a sip of coffee and swallowed the pills down with it. I took the blanket off the floor and wrapped it around me as I sat to watch rain droplets running down my window.

_These pills won't keep me away. I am here to stay forever. Stop fighting Spencer. _

"NO!" I yelled throwing aside the coffee spilling it all over the floor.

_Accept it!_

I started to cry feeling so helpless. I wasn't ready to accept it. I had hope this will all go away when I'm not as stressed as much.

_Now I own you too._

I rubbed the bandage over my temples waiting for the pills to work faster. All I could hear were laughs, everywhere, laughs, evil laughs making me wish for no hearing. I got up and searched for my iPod in my bag. I turned it on to its max volume and stuffed my ears with earphones. The sound so loud it hurt my ear canal. I tried concentrating on the lyrics.

_Accept it, there's no point fighting. _

I pressed the volume key to make it louder. My ears joined my eyes in crying. I fell on the bed as my head started to pond. The injured head demanded attention as waves of pain filled my head. I felt like exploding.

_Fighting will only make you weaker._

"Anything is possible with willpower" I screamed it out loud.

_Some things are beyond control Spencer._

"Anything is possible with willpower"

"Anything is possible with willpower"

"ANYTHING IS POSS-SIBLE WITH WILLPOWER!" I screamed to top of my lungs.

The music blasting in my ears didn't allow me to hear my own voice repeating what once Gideon told me but the pain in my throat told me I was loud enough. I lied in my bed waiting for sleep to rescue me from the dwelling hell. I started to cry like a mad man.

_Accept me; I will rescue you from your loneliness. _

I knew what was happening to me, I knew exactly where this was leading, my world was coming to an end, I know it wasn't far when I will forget everything, my contact with reality, my conscious, my memories, my knowledge. Fear raised another level within me adding onto the already overflowing misery.

I wish there was something to help save me from myself. I never wanted to fall in that deep ditch. I closed my eyes as my body finally started to relax. I took the music out of my ear and heard the thunder fall hard outside. I shifted to see lightning was continuously flashing. The storm reached its peak and I slowly went into sleep, deeper and deeper…..

**Emily POV….**

The storm was loud and the light kept flashing the whole hospital room. The sound of falling rain on my window made constant noise. I was never a big fan of storms and on top waiting for Reid and Morgan to arrive was making the experience worse. The dark clouds hovered all over the city blocking all the light and my room felt a new shade of grey. My mom just left couple of hours before for a meeting and since then the wait never ended.

I didn't knew what was happening to me, why was I so impatience to see Reid. I never felt like this before. The thunder struck even louder this time scaring me. I tried to close my eyes to imagine his smile again. I knew it would help.

"_I would still do the same no matter who was in her place. She's a human first and then my love"_

Reid's word echoed in my mind. Why was I so pleased to hear that?

"_and then my love"_

"_my love"_

I kept thinking of that moment, how he sounded like that time, his face expression, the purity in his words. I kept thinking how innocent he looked saying this to William. I kept thinking how it felt to hear that, again and again.

Another thunder struck and I pulled out realizing what I was doing. I made no sense. Why was I so drawn to those words that smile, those eyes that voice…?

The door squeaked as it opened and Morgan stepped in all wet from head to toe. My eyes ached as he closed the door behind leaving me baffled. Was he here alone? In the dark he looked lost. He moved his hand to switch the lights on.

"It's crazy out there" He said pulling his wet sleeves up.

"Reid didn't come" I said and then felt so silly asking such a question. I didn't have control of what I said anymore. He looked up, his eyes all red.

"He-he was not feeling well" He slowly said before placing the chair near me and I pulled myself into a sitting position.

"Oh! What happened?" I heard myself asking in such a concerning tone.

"Nothing much, he still has his headaches from that injury" Morgan explained. I sighed again thinking how much I was missing him. We sat there quietly listening to the falling thunder and rain.

"At least you get to see him" I said fixing my gaze straight ahead.

"You will too once you get discharge. You really need to meet him" Morgan words made no sense to me. Do Reid needed to see me or do I need to see him for myself? Which person was he referring to? Had Morgan some clue to my internal state of mind or maybe the desperation was too evident in my voice and face?

"I hope he feels better soon; I saw how bad William hit his head, that must've hurt a lot!" I told Morgan.

"Poor him" Morgan said still very lost in his thoughts.

"Is he alone at his place in that state?" I asked. He sadly nodded and his eyes were damp. I tensed.

"Morgan, is everything okay, please tell me Reid isn't that bad" I demanded. Thunder struck and Morgan looked away for a while.

"Tell me the truth" I asked looking at a troubled friend staring at the falling rain.

"He is not feeling okay at all, in fact he's sick and needs help. I offered him my support and he declined. He was all so mad so I just left" Morgan stumbled on his words.

"You left him in that condition!" I detected shock in my voice.

"He needs someone to take care of him not cause he is weak or anything but because he is a human that when get sick needs attention and proper medical care. He seems to connect everything to feeling like a kid or a baby if presented with help." Morgan stood up while talking. I could just imagine him whining being treated like a baby. He failed to understand our love and deep care.

"We can't leave him like that" I suggested Morgan. He nodded in agreement and took his phone out to make a call.

"Hi JJ, I have something for you to do. Can you please visit Reid with Hotch or something, he's really in need of care and he kept denying me. I want you to make sure he gets his help…..no, I know I was there but he didn't approve…he has his headache and he's alone now….Yes please….thanks JJ" He turned off and seated beside me again.

"JJ thought I was staying over his place" Morgan explained.

"Doctors saying I can discharge tomorrow. This way I can attend Rossi's reunion party too" I said.

"Yes, we really need this party already" Morgan said.

"Just one more night to pull off here, can't wait" I got excited at the thought I will leave this hell finally.

The storm seemed to subdue by now and a nurse dropped in to check upon me. After few vital checks Morgan asked how I was doing.

"She can be discharged tomorrow but still needs a week of rest at home. The doctors have prescribed some medicine for her internal wounds and dehydration. Other than that she is doing very well." Nurse told us both and continued her work.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Another Daylight**

**Morgan POV….**

Bright sun rays penetrated through the window gently warming up the room. The yellow light illuminated not only my room but my life. I got up from the bed stretching up starting my day. The warmth of the day felt so nice to my skin. I almost forget all the worries in my life and stepped out of that cozy blanket.

I started to walk over to the washroom without the cane in my hand anymore. At first, I felt a sharp sting in that injured area but after shifting more of the weight to my right leg I could walk. A small smile appeared on my face realizing the good response my body was giving. I returned from washing my face to find my phone ringing on my side table. Caller ID showed JJ's name.

"Good morning JJ!" I greeted her first.

"Hi Morgan, I hope I didn't wake you up" She said.

"NO, no, I was up already, everything okay there?" I answered with a question.

"….I stayed over tonight, Spence wasn't feeling well at all, anxiety, nervousness, …he was a total mess, I think you have some explaining to do here" she responded.

"Hmm, what explaining, what happened?" I asked this time scared of what Reid might have done after I left him yesterday.

"I got here with Hotch and found this place in worst possible shape, coffee spilled, clothes, books, papers, food, everything was out of order and not to say he took so many sleeping pills all at once. I was afraid he over-dosed so Hotch called in a doctor. Did you really have no idea how bad this was?" For few moments JJ kept talking leaving me amazed at what I heard.

"JJ, I—I was there but-"I had no answer for her.

"Morgan, he's still asleep, Hotch stayed over too but left just a while ago. I feel so bad now that I left all the responsibility on you, I thought you cared!" JJ's voice saddened up.

"Hey there JJ, I care, I was there but he kicked me out of his place, literally threw me out!" I answered.

"Then there must be a hell of a reason for him to do that and you better tell me before I ask him myself" JJ threatened me.

"Come on, try to understand JJ. Reid never wanted me there; I swear I tried everything to stay there"

"So this means you are not going to tell me the truth huh?" JJ's tones changed.

"What truth?"

"You exactly know what I'm talking about. I called to just let you know of the situation, Hotch will deal with you after soon" JJ said.

"So now you guys are mad at me too! What is this?" I pleaded.

"You know Spence never overreacts to anything, this must be very big for him to do such a thing!"

"So you think he took the pills because of me! Bullshit JJ!" I literally yelled this time understanding the hidden accusation in her voice.

"I never said that Morgan and please calm down" JJ's voiced cracked as she talked. She disconnected the phone afterwards leaving me overwhelmed at everything.

It was such a mere issue and Reid was making such a big fuss about it! I don't think he took the pills because of that, he could never do that. His condition was bad even before I brought this issue up. Reid was furiously mad at me. There was no way he was cooling down any soon, he was embracement and betrayed. Only Emily could do the miracle. Good thing she was getting discharged today.

I threw my phone on the bed and went off to change. I wanted to see Emily and maybe discuss some issues before she meets Reid.

**Reid POV…**

"Spence, wake up" JJ's soft voice lured me out of my sleep. I slightly opened one eye to find the room bathing in pure yellow sunlight. It was so bright in there. After few blinks, my eyes adjusted and saw JJ sitting beside my bedside.

"How are you feeling now?" She asked right away noticing my movements. I quickly sat up to see the whole room was clean, no dishes on the side, books on the floor, or clothes hanging out from everywhere. My room was back to how it used to look before William entered our lives.

"I am good. JJ did you just do all this by yourself?" I asked surprisingly. She nodded with a warm smile.

"I have no words to thank you" I answered filling each word with as much love as possible. If I ever had a sister, she would be like her, totally like her. I couldn't hold my smile looking at her soft welcoming face expression.

"You're welcome Spence but don't give all the credit to me, there was another little helper present here too!" She smirked.

"REALLY! Henry is here too?" I asked looking around for my godson.

"Will is away for his annual head meeting so I brought him here along with me" JJ said as got up from the bed "he's still sleeping".

"You didn't have to do this for me" I said feeling guilty of how much trouble I was for my team. She turned around giving me her angriest look possible.

"I mean- thank you" I wanted to take that back. The angry looked replaced with a smirk.

"Spence, I had to do this because I care about my things, you get that!" She asked while stirring the coffee on my side table.

I moved the blanket away and found my headphones still tangled inside the sheets. That scene elicited the terrible yesterday. Those whispers were too annoying that I wanted to die.

Suddenly, I paid more attention inside my head to hear something but at the same time terribly wishing for it to never return. There was nothing, no laughs, no whispers. I relieved. JJ was staring at me during the whole process of reviving the whispers.

"Everything alright there?" She asked.

"Yes, hmm, the headache is gone finally" I told her realizing my head wasn't ponding any longer.

"Doctor told you to have complete bed rest and mental relaxation" she explained and I grabbed the hot coffee up. I sipped in to find that it was the perfect sweet taste I delighted.

"Spence?" She again sat beside me.

"Yes"

"Why did you take so many pills at a time?"

"-Headache was too intense"

"That's not a cure. You could've called me, Hotch or anyone for help, you knew the consequences of overdose and still- imagine what would have happen if I didn't find that bottle lying around"

"I—know"

"How can you be that irresponsible?"

"I am sorry" my voice cracked this time. JJ kept her gaze steady while I looked down at my fingers trying to avoid the obvious. I could never tell anyone what trouble I was having; the revelation of those whispers was end of my life with this team, this family.

"What happened between you and Morgan yesterday?" JJ asked firmly. I looked up this time trying to read her face for how much she already knew about our argument.

"Hmm, nothing much" I tried to avoid that side of the story.

"Come on Spence, I know you are hiding something there, you can tell me, don't you trust me" She gently brushed her fingers over my hand.

"There's nothing to tell and about trust, don't expect any from me" I answered and got up from the bed. JJ remained lost in her thoughts. I knew she was putting up a story inside her head. I couldn't imagine if Morgan told everyone about our fight cause that would be the end of him. I wanted to invert the conversation around, somehow, escaping yet another set of questions.

"Let's get the breakfast ready before Henry gets up, shall we?" I asked JJ and she smiled to indicate her agreement.

**EMILY POV…**

I was seated in a wheelchair beside the information desk with my hand bag waiting for my mom to finish all the paper work for the hospital.

"YES, ITS FRIDAY!" a nurse ran down the entrance cheerily. Somebody was excited for today. Not to mention me, I was dying to step out in that bright sunny day. But, I had to stay in that crappy wheelchair for a day or two so I don't damage the internal wounds again. Mom walked over with a piece of paper for me to sign.

"Good Morning, pretty lady!" Morgan's voice surprised me.

"OH, hi there" I answered returning the papers back.

"Ready to get home?" He asked bending down in front of me. I rolled my eyes.

"DYING!" I laughed and he joined. The sound of us laughing after so long send jolts down my spine. The same warm jolts I got when I was freezing in that big freezer. I remember how dead I felt, how numb everything became but then there came the life-filled heat, the intense warmth which brought me back to life, how hot his body felt against me, slowing pulling me out of that cold death. Tears swam into my eyes imagining that moments yet again.

"Hey-hey, Emily, what's that now, huh?" Morgan asked realizing the tears leaving my eyes. I quickly got back to normal wiping my tears away.

"Emily, you were the bravest girl I know, why are you tearing up like this?" Morgan's sadly asked.

"Morgan, I never imagined that some things in life could affect me this much" I answered picturing that same heat again covering and protecting my body.

"I never knew such strong feelings could even exist" I found myself saying and Morgan attentively listening. O, what I could do to forever possess these feelings.

"I promise you, this will all get better with time" Morgan answered with a smile before standing back up.

My mother joined him and pushed the wheel chair from its place to outside in the open again. The same blue sky welcomed me back sending such calm effects down my way. I lifted my head up as we walked over to the parking praising the warm blue ceiling stretching to infinity. That intoxicating smile returned sending jolts of happiness to every cell of my body. I didn't know if I could ever see Reid the same way again. He was not just a friend, co-worker or BAU member but he earned a special place in my heart. I didn't know how but during past few days, he became the remedy of all my pains, sufferings and fears. I didn't know how I would react when I finally get to see him, meet him, witness that smile again to forever capture it in the strongest memories my mind could hold.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Normalcy**

**I am very thankful to all the reviews. They mean a lot to a writer and motivate them to write on so thanks again to all my readers. **

The ride back home was smooth with Morgan's car driving behind ours. I was finally heading home, the last ride I had was with Morgan and Reid going after William on that dark road. It still was replaying in my mind. I remembered how bad the impact was when the SUV fell off from that road. I could still hear Reid scream my name after getting off the van trying to get me out too.

I wasn't injured at all luckily but the darkness was blinding there with the headlights now turned off. In that starry night, I see could a shadow approaching Reid from behind who was pushing the door open for me. I remembered how tensed I became seeing someone coming close. I could sense Morgan was not near us. I went after my gun but realized it had slipped out with the accident. That shadow approached Reid with a surprise attack grabbing him from behind, one hand placing that gun right on Reid's temple and other covering his mouth. I froze there momentarily. Reid muffled under his hand but William hit his left temple hard with the sharp end of the gun.

I still remember how he threatened me to come out, he held Reid tight in place slowly backing off.

"You talk and you're dead!" William whispered in Reid's ear before taking his hand away to extract Reid's gun out of his belt. He placed the gun in his pocket leaving Reid defenceless.

I remembered how Morgan was yelling for us from the middle of the road. Darkness blinded us all; there was nothing to see but glimpses of dark figures.

I could still close my eyes and see how William took those handcuffs out from his back pocket while keeping the gun onto Reid's forehead.

"Place them on her!" He whispered another order into Reid's ears. I remember how he was so calm putting those cuffs around my wrists. In that moment, all that was left was hope, Morgan, who was still too far away from us.

"REID, EMILY!" I heard him call for us again alerting the Unsub even further. He defiantly never wanted Morgan to join us.

"Tell him you are fine and nothing else, you understand that boy" William whispered to Reid again so Morgan could let his guards down this time.

"Right here" Reid loudly followed his order.

This time he smashed his gun harder on Reid's forehead to knock him unconscious. I remember how limp his body became falling back into William's arms. I was ready to punch this Unsub out but he was much better seeing in that dark and I became his victim. Ahhh, how hard he hit me on my head!

"Emily, Emily, let me help you get out from here?" My mom's voice jerked me out from the memories of that night. I exhaled out all the tension before nodded. I pushed myself at the edge of the seat from where Morgan's strong shoulders and mom's firm grip got me back into my wheelchair.

"Oh come on, don't treat me like a disable now!" I complained as we headed to my mom's house. I was supposed to stay with her until I get better enough to head back to my apartment.

"It's just extra care dear" I heard her talking in her motherly tone.

**Morgan POV…**

I wanted Emily to feel as comfortable as possible because I witnessed the hell she went through. But no one could be more proud of her than me seeing her returning to us slowly. I just wished Reid could recover fast too and forgive me for what I had done. I could not imagine my life without him. He could be mad at me for now because he had the right to but I would get it all back.

The guilt of the fight was already suffocating me and hiding it from Emily was even tougher. I knew she would ask me how he was. We settled in her house, her aunt was here who already prepared lunch for us. We sat together to eat. Then, I received Garcia's text.

"Hey Sugary boy, I'm coming over to join you guys with all the plans of tomorrow's party"

"Garcia's coming" I let Emily and rest know.

Emily looked up as if she was expecting some other notification and got disappointed at my words. I went back to stuffing my mouth with that delicious rice thinking about the party already. Garcia never failed to get all of us back together to one page; I hope I could sort something out with Reid by that time.

We finished the eating and rested ourselves in the living room. Emily and I sat flipping through TV channels.

"So JJ's still with Reid?" Emily asked finally.

"Yeah, she stayed overnight" I answered back seeing how nervous she looked.

"Emily?" I called her.

"Morgan, I want to call Reid" She let out the words she was thinking over for few moments. She never met him since William's death.

"Sure go head" I smiled passing her the home phone. She first dialled Reid's cell. There was no response.

"He told me his phone was out of battery" I remembered and informed her "try the home phone". Her face tensed as the dial tone went over.

"Hi, Its Emily…Oh JJ….I am feeling lot better, just can't wait to see you all tomorrow at Garcia's party….O sorry Rossi's party….hmmm…..yeah, finally I got out….So Reid's pass by, can I talk with him?" Emily talked.

"Oh…that's nice…well take care then. I will see you tomorrow. Byeee" Emily ended the call.

"What?" I asked.

"He's not home, he took Henry to the nearby park" she exhaled loudly putting the phone back and relaxing. She looked sad and tired. I almost felt as she was not here with me anymore but lost somewhere else. Lost in her thoughts, She forgot that I was sitting there watching her. I too sat back and started to plan how I will approach Reid tomorrow. Will he forgive me? Maybe he was just stressed that day so he reacted too much, or maybe he'll be pleased that Emily now knows how he feels. But what if he doesn't? I planned I would beg if I had to. I was not letting go of his side. I would not act like his father or Gideon. I promised to stay.

"_If I get to live all over again, I'll make sure that I never face the fear of abandonment ever. It slowly eats me up from inside" Reid said one day as we drove to the police station to share our findings with the team._

"_Boy, no fear now that I am here by your side" I answered._

The smile that followed this was worth thousands words. He felt content and finally not lonely. We slowly became his family and his secure future. He would give up almost everything to ensure our safety. We were all he possessed. Who could doubt his desperation after how he tackled William.

How could he tolerant someone from his family to betray him like this? I never thought in that way before. He cried because of me. He clearly said I caused his tears. Guilt transferred into bile and painfully concentrated in my throat. How could I cause such trouble in his life? Will he ever get back to normal? Lost in those questions, I didn't realize Emily's mom and Aunt in the living room with Garcia.

"Are you too dead or something?" Garcia asked in shock looking at the two still figures on the sofas lost in thoughts.

"Oh, I didn't know you were here, sorry about that?" Emily recovered quickly.

"Like seriously that was a freaky sight!" Garcia kept staring at us. Emily smiled in response.

"It must be all the scary memories from your abduction terrifying you there" Garcia sat beside Emily. Both of us remained quiet for that part but she couldn't take the gloomy atmosphere any longer.

"OOOOkkay guys, let's move on! I got great things to share with you" Garcia's cheerful tone brought smiles to our faces. Sometimes, she worked like a magnet pulling us out of misery in no time.

"Let's hear it then baby girl" I joined in.

**Reid POV…**

I sat on the park bench as Henry played in the sand. He was laughing and playing with other little kids. It was like he was born to be happy and cheerful. He truly was lucky to be born this way. I kept my gaze on him.

_Not everyone is as miserable as you. _

I looked around to see if someone was standing near me. The whisper felt so real. I got up to see if it was my mind playing games again.

_You were always a pathetic loser and will always remain one. _

Not again, I was not ready to again be tormented by negative whispers in my mind especially not in a public place like this. I must get home fast. I walked to where Henry was still playing.

_I bet the kid dislikes you too. _

"Henry, time to go back" I called out. He looked up so disappointedly I immediately regretted. He threw the sand down and ran toward me. He didn't stop until he grabbed my right leg and pulled.

"Let's go Uncle Spencer" the tiny eyes looked up and requested.

_No Spencer let's not go back there. _

I grabbed his hand to walk back to my apartment. He walked tiny steps so I slowed down to match his pace. He skipped and hopped.

_Spencer no one cares. _

I remained quiet but frustrated with random nonsense whispers. I was beyond exhausted with my mind. How could I ever escape from this constant fear? There was no way I could live with that.

_Life is so unfair to you! _

"YES IT IS!" I answered back exhausted with the unclear thoughts.

"Uncle Spencer!" Henry startled hearing me yelling. He stopped walking. I signed realizing the cause and bent down in front of him to explain.

"Sorry, hmm—mm" before I could say anything he ran off to the entrance of my building.

I stood back up but this time with slow creeping headache returning. I felt sudden pressure pressing behind my eyes. I wanted to cry in front of the world sharing my grief. I felt I was losing my control. I wanted to cry and cry in hope I could get better. Depression and frustration chocked every bit of life I still held on to. I looked around at the people walking on the road, cars zooming, birds flying away, sky travelling over my head. They were all lost in their own lives…like no one knew how I felt, like no one cared. Losing myself to the whispers, I sat down on the sidewalk.

_There is no escape. Accept it. _

How could one feel so lonely in this world full of lives? Tears were the desperate prisons of my misery, waiting to bail out. I sat there listening to the voices, whispers, misery…I felt I was losing to them. I was tired of fighting them.

_You were never alone, I was always here. _

No! I am not lonely. My breathing increased, I took my cell phone out switching it on for the first time since I returned from California.

_Hope only prolongs the torment of men. _

Unconsciously, I dialled Morgan's number. My fingers not supporting my thought process any longer. The dial tone overshadowed the whispers.

_He is a liar and traitor. _

"Reid, I can't believe you are actually calling me" Morgan's voice felt so alive. Listening to him always brightened me up.

"Reid, you there?" He spoke again and tears drained out of my eyes.

"Reid! Reid! Talk to me. Everything alright there huh?" I concentrated on his voice to soothe me down. I calmed down. The anxiety lowered immediately.

"Please Reid! HELLO!" I closed my eyes and mediated on his voice rather the whispers.

_He is a liar and traitor. He is a liar and traitor. He is a liar and traitor. _

"I am sorry, please talk to me pretty boy, please!" his voice started the battle with the voices. My head ponded trying to concentrate, focusing all my attention to his words.

"REID! Why are you sitting here?" JJ's voice put an end to the struggle. I turned the phone off and wiped my tears away before facing her. She looked worried.

"Hmm—I was just calling my—mom" I lied.

"O, come on in, it's your own place." She replied and I followed her after putting my phone back in my pocket.

_Fighting is useless. I am here to help. It's time you let me in. _


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: The Party **

**EMILY POV…**

Finally the most waited evening arrived. My Aunt got my dress ready for Rossi's party. Still residing on the wheelchair with bandaged up toes and fingers, I was not in a mood to dress up.

"It's not something fancy, just a simple team dinner" I insisted.

O God she was so persuading, she dressed me up like I was getting married or something. The black shinny dress went up to my knees and she made a nice bun over my head. She then put red lipsticks on and I exhaled loudly.

"This is just too girly for me Aunt!" I tried fighting her but she kept giving the finishing touches.

"Just look at yourself, you look gorgeous!" She added when she finished and handed me my purse. I gave my feet one last look before forgetting about the bandages and pain for tonight. I wanted to feel normal again but the wheelchair was a constant reminder of all the craziness. Morgan was supposed to here anytime picking me up. The excitement started to build inside me. Tonight I was finally going to see Reid again. I didn't even know how he looked with all the bandages covering his forehead.

"Morgan's here" Aunt pushed the wheelchair down the hall to the entrance where Morgan was walking toward.

"Look at this pretty lady!" Morgan's eyes widen as he smiled fully.

"May I get the chance to take this beauty out tonight?" He extended his hand out for me.

"Just push this cart for now" I said in return.

"Cart?" He frowned before joining me in a laugh. He took over the wheelchair from my Aunt and we made our way to Rossi's so called mansion.

From far one could see the whole mansion covered in lighting. The flowery scent set a great ambiance as we headed inside. Light classical music was playing in the background. White fountains poured crystalline water setting a sight so calming to the eye. Some of our BAU staff was here as well with Erin Strauss wearing her professional attire even to a party. Mostly the atmosphere was settled and I felt overly dressed up for the night.

"This has to be the prettiest sight ever!" Garcia popped right in front of us greeting with praises. She couldn't get over the fact that I dressed up that much. Obviously she fell in love with my dress right away.

"You two are last to arrive" She told as Rossi joined us too.

"I must say I never expected you to be so—so lady like" Rossi grinned at me.

"WO-there Rossi!" Morgan chuckled. I could see him staring at my fingers covered up with bandages. Garcia pulled Morgan away and both walked together to join the party.

"You're doing just fine" Rossi whispered winking and pushing my wheelchair to where rest of my team was settled. Hotch, JJ and Reid were sitting on a round table chatting.

My heart skipped a beat when my eyes finally landed on him. The world stopped for a while where only he existed. He looked the same how he always looked, innocent. I could feel my eyes smiling. He wore his casual jeans and a green shirt. The bandage on his forehead matched the colour of my fingers. Why was I paying so much attention to him? I never did that before. I told myself I had to act normal.

"Look at the chief guest of the night" Rossi introduced me to them and they all finally turned around to notice me.

"WOW! You look so dam nice" JJ said and stood up. Hotch just presented his plain smile while Reid just stared.

"Thanks, my Aunt went over the board a little" I answered. Rossi then said something which I didn't catch as I felt so nervous being in front of Reid. I was so mad for acting that way. AHHHH! Everyone was there talking to me but I wanted to hear Reid already. I hated to admit it but I felt desperate. I reminded myself, be normal, be normal, be normal. He looked as if he was lost somewhere. He kept his eyes on me and I felt even more nervous. I felt a sudden urge to return the intense gaze and never look away then. Emily act normal, I told myself.

"Hi guys, how are you two doing?" I asked Hotch and Reid collectively trying to calm myself down.

"Great!" Hotch answered.

"I am doing good Emily" Reid's voice shook all my confidence for a while. I felt angrier this time. Why on earth was I feeling so weird around him?

JJ pushed my chair to align it with the table and I joined the rest. In the background Morgan and Garcia were already dancing together lightly. I sneaked up another look at Reid and he was busy playing with his fingers. This gave me a chance to fully look at him for once. He looked sad. My heart sank imagining what hell he must be going through. His face was tensed as he continued to examine his fingers trying to avoid us. It felt as if centuries were passed since I had a good look at that face again, I wanted time to slow down.

Feeling little uneasy there, Reid lifted his eyes straight at me and abruptly looked away. I too felt stroppy staring him down like that. Why couldn't I just act normal already? It wasn't the first time I was meeting him so then why? JJ and Hotch continued there chat leaving me and Reid in this most awkward moment ever.

"Drinks everyone" Rossi came back this time with glasses.

"Sure" Hotch grabbed his drink and passed along the rest. Of course Reid refused to take one.

"I'm still a little dehydrated so I shouldn't have any alcohol and in fact Emily shouldn't drink either just to be on the safe side" Reid told the rest while I shoot over to another world hearing so much concern in his voice. This was the limit of being such a despo.

"If you say so doctor, I can take orange juice instead" I replied and this time he smiled directly at me. The same smile which haunted me every night, the same smile which wiped my tears away every day, the same smile easing up all the pains, the smile that I was dying to see and feel again. I froze in that moment; maybe words couldn't define how much that smile meant to me now. He got up from his chair, my eyes still focused on him.

"I'll get it for you" Reid said to leave.

"I can come along if you don't mind" I requested feeling so paralyzed in my chair. Reid nodded and walked over to wheelchair pulling it out from the gathering. His presence behind my chair was enough to send me chills. I could smell his scent again, the same scent that reminded me of returning back to life. He pushed me over to where the drinks were settled. He got two juice glasses for us and presented me one.

"Thank you!" were the words leaving my mouth.

"Emily, how are your fingers feeling now?" He asked.

"Hmm, very healed is the right word to describe them" I answered back.

"Sorry, I couldn't come to see you in the hospital" he apologized while sipping the juice.

"There's no need to say sorry, I knew you still needed to recover yourself. So, how's your progress going?" I asked finally calming down. This was the same Reid I felt so friendly around before.

"Yeah, I was little zooned out, headaches, insomnia, and dizziness so it was pretty bad but I am alright now" He answered.

"I didn't even recognize you when you came in" Reid told me smiling again.

"Really, I look that odd?" I commented back. Finally, the tension between us was lightening.

"Odd is not the right word, let's just say you look different" he shyly corrected me, his eyes sparkling in the lights of the party, his smile intoxicating me.

"Come on pretty boy, say it that she looks pretty" Morgan joined in from nowhere patting Reid's shoulder.

Reid moved away letting Morgan's arm fall off his shoulder. He frowned and looked away. Morgan too seemed worried now. Although Morgan was my best friend and I loved his company but right now I wanted to be left alone with Reid. I missed him too much over last few days that I wasn't over it yet. This was just becoming more and more difficult.

"Morgan you looked better dancing from that distance" Reid commented rudely and walked away putting his juice glass back down. Morgan's face tensed even further. Both of our eyes chased Reid until he disappeared in the crowd.

"That was so unlike Reid" I said.

**Morgan POV…**

"Maybe I invaded his privacy with that pat on his shoulder" I explained her trying to avoid the hidden anger in my tone. All I wanted to do that time was pull him to a side and scream at him for insulting me like that. I knew I wanted things to be back far too quickly but the sudden frustration was making me insane.

"He was never offending by your touch before" Emily's words annoyed me even more.

"I know but sometimes even geniuses need some screwing down to their brains" I said and excused myself back to go back to Garcia then realized Emily's presence to be demanding. She put her glass back too and started to push herself on that wheelchair.

"Want help?" I asked.

"I can do it, thanks" She pushed her way along back to the table. I needed to get Reid alone somehow to deal with the mess already. Ignorance burns the hell inside me. So I decided to get back to the table too and found our whole team united together now. New bright beams showcased on each face as dinner was finally served. We sat all together to eat.

"Get yourselves ready for the ultimate fun after dinner" Garcia exclaimed.

"Fun?" JJ and Emily spoke together.

"Yes, some fun games, it was all Rossi's idea" She explained and Rossi laughed off.

"Blame me for it" He said.

"Well, since when did you start thinking about 'fun' games?" Hotch asked him taking another bite of the roasted chicken.

"Since two days ago" Rossi answered.

"It's never too late to discover fun in life" Emily added.

"Age is only a physiological number defining the time spent sustaining all the chemical reactions inside our bodies" Reid spoke keeping his eyes to his half-filled plate.

"Excuse me but you talk way too much about my age?" Rossi eyed him.

"Do I or are you just little too conscious there?" Reid smirked and Rossi laughed it off too.

"Spence, just heads up you are right now on Rossi's property, better watch out" JJ mentioned.

"Morgan, you seem all too quiet there? Not enjoying my hospitality?" Rossi asked me directly focusing all his attention onto me. I exhaled and looked up at Reid instead who exchanged a glance too.

"Your hospitality is flawless but temperament of some people here are enough to spoil my mood" I answered looking straight at our doctor. Everyone turned their attention to me now. "Like some of the waiters at the drinks table are just too rude" I shifted the meanings around.

"You got a problem with the workers here?" Garcia asked worriedly since she was the one who called them in the first place.

"You just called them rude without even knowing why they were acting that way?" Reid questioned me directly.

"There is a phenomenon called respect, Dr. Spencer Reid" I answered harshly.

"What do you know about respect Agent Derek Morgan?" He asked and everyone halted their eating.

"Boys, it's just a mean bad worker, no need to get instigated by it" Garcia requested. I knew how much Reid hated to be advertised like this. I knew he must be fueling inside realizing how openly I was attacking him. I had no other way to get to him. I wanted to end this and hoped this would do the trick. At least he will get mad at me, scream and yell at me and then maybe forgive me. I hated seeing him so upset. I wished I could hug him and make everything happy between us but for now I had to continue my plan. Like it or not Spencer Reid but this is how I deal with you.


	14. Chapter 14

**CH 14: The Feelings**

**Reid POV…**

Eating, not the right word, playing with the food was more informative about the actions I was doing sitting on that table with rest of my team. I hated the tension between me and Morgan. I never felt lonelier in my life than this day. But I was angry. Every time I saw his face, it reminded me of his betrayal. On top, now Emily knew all about me! I was so tensed under her constant gaze. My mind had no idea what she was thinking. The formalities that suddenly fell between all three of us were slowly deterring me. I was helpless at how fast life twisted in front of me.

Soon, the dinner was over. I didn't dare talk during the eating any longer, I had enough with Morgan. Last thing I wanted to do was to tell others what made us fought in the first place.

Since Emily entered the party, I did nothing but profile her and her thoughts about me. So far she seemed confused and lost. Now that Morgan told her everything, did she really laugh on me or considered giving it a little thought. I can't imagine her thinking about me, a guy like me don't deserve her. Everyone got off the table as they finished. Morgan walked over to me. I remained seated. The avoidance mode started.

"Reid, I need to talk to you" He said standing real close to me bothering the hell out of me.

"Not interested" I answered getting away a little. Rest of the team all moved here and there doing their businesses.

"Reid, don't show me attitude here" this time he grabbed my right wrist and said. He started to pull me off the chair.

"Morgan, let go!" I demanded more angrily.

"I need to talk now!" He raised his voice just a little this time. Anger boiled inside me. How dare he pull my wrist like this?

"Leave me!" I forcedly tried to pull my arm away but he held his grip.

"Don't make me do this here" I warned him but he seemed intact. He then pulled me off my chair and dragged me. I was tired of his games. I was exhausted of myself and this world. I had no energy to fight him any longer so I walked with him to a side. He pushed me against the wall and stood in front blocking my way.

"What is this stupidity?" I asked fuelling with annoyance.

"Why did you call me yesterday?" He asked me what I feared. I remained quiet.

"I am asking you something, why didn't you say anything then?" he asked again. I looked away.

"You know you can't hide from me" He said.

"Morgan-"

"Reid! Why the hell you called me!" He was very angry this time. He came even closer, driving me insane with the intrusion.

"Morgan, please—"

"Please what?"

"I am not in a mood to discuss anything right now"

"Accept it Reid, you need me, that's why you called! You need all of us, we are like a family to you" Morgan's tone switched to concerned sounds.

"I don't need anyone anymore!" I answered back.

"Please, I begging you, let's get over this now" Morgan requested.

"You might easily get over after breaking someone's trust but not me, I am hurt, I am broken because that one person that I trusted more than myself, that one person who I cared and needed the most in life, betrayed me. You think I can get over the fact that I have no one left to share my thoughts, ideas, dreams, wishes …everything! I am lonely as ever and there's nothing you can do now to fix it!" I answered holding back my tears. Morgan stood still. Silence followed.

"I am sorry" he lightly spoke.

"I wish you had never done that. Morgan, I miss you, I miss us" I answered.

"You can always turn back, always count on me" He said.

"You hurt me once, you won't hurt me again and I will make sure you never get that chance" I said and shoved him aside to walk back to the glittering lights of the party. Maybe he won't ever understand what he meant to me, not just a co-worker, a friend, a brother. Just then I saw Hotch standing and watching over us. He gave me the most concerning stare to which I rejected to respond and left to where ladies were sitting. I guessed that Hotch will now deal with Morgan before he approaches me.

I took the seat beside JJ. Emily's wheel chair was on her other side. JJ's phone rang and she excused herself attending Will's call. Rossi and Garcia were now getting ready to launch their scheme of fun. I sat back and waited until Emily's eyes threw my world upside down. Her behaviour seemed so unusual since the start of this gathering. Even with so much experience of profiling, I failed to understand her. I gained all my confidence and returned her a gaze. She smiled in returned.

My heart sank seeing her so still in her wheelchair, so broken by William. Her fingers wrapped in bandages must constantly remind her of the life threatening cold. A shiver ran up my spine remembering the cool air I was breathing in there.

I had to snap out of my thoughts to pay attention to her words rather than her thoughts.

"Is everything okay there with Morgan?" She asked.

"I am angry at him for some reason" I answered her.

"Care to share the reason?" Emily politely asked and I quickly ran all the consequences of telling her. How could I tell her that she is the reason of this fight?

"Well, it's nothing, just a little argument" I responded but she did not buy my idea. She was a dam good profiler, impossible to hide from. Her face expressions clearly showed sign of acknowledgement. What if Morgan told her about this quarrel as well? All my previous theories about his behaviour went out of the window.

"Oh, I hope it gets sorted out soon. If you need me to scold him or something just let me know." She cackled off and left me mesmerized by her laugh.

Who could deny she was the girl of my dreams, the only girl I ever felt nice being around, the only one who could understand me without speaking. I respected her more than anything, her morals, her values, her knowledge, everything felt so perfect. Since her first day with us, I knew she was different, maybe different enough for me. I never wanted her to know I admired her in such a way.

She was the objection of my love that I could be happy to see from far but gaining her acceptance was never my plan. The embarrassment hidden in confessing to her was too much to even live on. I considered myself a disgrace to her majestic ways. And now Morgan had done something I feared so much. I was having hard time being normal in front of her. I couldn't focus on anything but her. The more I looked at her, the madder I got on Morgan for ruining such a delicate friendship. I knew she changed her behaviour for me, she wasn't the same anymore. Why Morgan had to destroy my only secret happy lala land?

I came out of my thoughts when Garcia's voice interrupted the perfect classical tunes playing in the background.

"My fellows, this party is in honor of the BAU family reunion. Thanks a lot for all coming out and making this evening memorable." Garcia spoke over in a microphone. She cleared her throat before starting again "the first surprise of the evening is here….ladies and gentleman our very own…David Rossi". She pointed over to where Rossi was standing, mick in his hand. Music started to play and he tapped his feet to the beat.

"Can't miss seeing this epic moment!" JJ exclaimed as she returned.

"Is he actually going to sing?" Emily's face brightened up and she glowed beautifully in the lights. A brilliant smile displayed on her face as Rossi started to sing.

This was the first time he ever sang in front of us. Although it was an English song, he seemed prepared. He wasn't as good as he was in the field of profiling but the surprise sure was shocking for everyone!

**Emily POV…..**

I sat there listening to Rossi singing for first time in life, there was music playing in the background, all the tension that we went through past few weeks started to fade in that moment. Garcia started to clap with the beat and soon everyone followed her and with each beat, claps supported his singing.

From my peripheral vision, I could see Reid clapping for Rossi. His eyes focused on the singer and he was smiling. In that moment, I didn't know who to pay more attention to. Without thinking, I shifted my head to enjoy the happy scenes radiating from Reid.

For first time in life, I couldn't understand my actions. I had no explanation for what I was doing and why. These past few weeks, he became my medicine. Maybe I just wanted my dose daily to become healthy again.

Maybe my mind had classical conditioned his existence, his smile with rescue. He was my saviour from William. How could I forget what he had done for me? I thought he deserves appreciation in his life and if I provide that for me, he would the happiest man for rest of his life.

Maybe I should talk to Morgan, ask more about Reid's feeling but at the same time I wanted to retract from the developing plot in our lives. This decision could ruin everything for us. I planned to remain quiet for now.

The face I was staring for so long turned to my attention. I hesitated but continued my gaze in the same direction. He kept his eyes on me, my eyes now staring straight into his eyes drowning in the painful seas so advent in that look. I knew, Reid was in trouble, some grave problem. The challenge remained as both of us not wanted to break that stare and melt away in that powerful moment.


	15. Chapter 15

**CH 15: How 'bout us By Champaign**

**EMILY POV CONT…**

"_Some people can hold it together, _

_Last, through all kinds of weather, _

…_can we?"_ Rossi continued singing

The lyrics hit my attention like lightening but I kept my focus on the eyes in front me drinking in the sight even more with the added music. It felt like I was in a movie.

"_Ooo…some people are made for each other,_

_Some people can love one another for life,_

_How 'bout us? How 'bout us, baby?"_

People started to cheer loudly as the song reached its climax. Reid finally gave me another one of his smile that I wanted to treasure forever and finally looked away to Rossi. Just then, Rossi walked down from the stage and over to Chief Erin while singing as delightedly as possible.

"_Now don't you get me wrong,_

_Cos I'm not tryin' now to end it all, _

_It's just that I have seen, _

_Too many lover's hearts lose their dream, _

"_Some people can hold it together, _

_Last, through all kinds of weather, _

…_can we"_

No words could do the justice to the expression Erin had on her face. The party was worth it! I must say Rossi did perfect capturing everyone's mind with this lovely tune and lyrics. I could hear some humming from the gathering.

"_How 'bout us? How 'bout us? How 'bout us? How 'bout us"_

I quickly looked around for each member of my team and they all were lost in the ambiance that Rossi had set. The song finally ended and the whole gathering stood up to honor the singing of the most experienced profiler on our team. I stayed on my wheelchair and cheered my parts from there.

The mood of party took another turn, everyone now feeling a new positive energy. Rossi bowed and said "Hope I did some justice to Champaign" and left the stage to join us. JJ's eyes were left wide open.

"No way can you sing this good!" She finally commented when he took a seat beside us.

"Nice choice of the song" Reid smirked.

"I don't usually get things wrong" Rossi answered placing his hand on Reid's knee.

"So what's so special about this?" I asked.

"Profiling me there Emily?" Rossi laughed off and then inhaled deeply.

"This was my first wedding song" He answered.

"Awwh, so sweet!" JJ said. Morgan and Hotch joined in with a weird smile. He sure was enjoying this party more than any of us. Hotch took another sip from his drink and suddenly stumbled little spilling all the liquid on my dress.

"SHOOT!" escaped from my mouth and JJ got up abruptly.

"I'm sorry" Hotch quickly returned to his boos mode. Guilt was dripping off him.

"It's okay, I can clean it off" I told Hotch to relax. He was panicking.

"I didn't even realize, sorry" Hotch said again.

"Let me help you" JJ took charge of my wheelchair and excused us from the table. Before leaving, I saw Reid was giggling, trying to drink in a laugh that he sure wanted to let out. At that sight, I heard my mind say 'wow'!

We quickly entered Rossi's resident and toward the washrooms. The interior as luxurious and deluxe as possible, even the washrooms were a sight on its own. JJ quickly damped up some tissues.

"Boys get so wild in parties!" JJ joked.

"Come on, Hotch never does that" I answered back. JJ retuned and scrubbed my ruined dress pieces with the damped tissues absorbing all of Hotch's drink off the fabric.

"Talking about our boys, what's going between Reid and Morgan?" I inquired.

"Honest to God, I am clueless. Well, you missed on a lot of action" She answered.

"They fought that's I know" I added.

"That day when I and Hotch went to Reid's place, I went into sudden seeing the disaster. He threw about every book he owned to floor, here and there, dirty dishes, spilled coffee, clothes, wires, and about everything was out of place" she said leaving me all worried.

"Oh my!" I said and she continued.

"We found him in his bed overdosed on sleeping pills!"

"WHAT?" the pain in my voice became so explicit, I retracted back. JJ stood up to toss the tissue in garbage bin.

"We called in paramedics on time and things got better but Hotch became insanely worried. I stayed overtime but Reid didn't say a word. God knows how helpless I felt" JJ bent leaned on the sink with arms crossed. She looked tensed.

"Morgan must've known something" I softly said.

"I bet he does but he's being such a pain nowadays"

"You noticed how they were attacking each other during the dinner, we need to figure out this mess fast" I told her.

"Right, they never fought ever before, this must be big, and this all can affect the team's unity" JJ mentioned.

"Morgan wouldn't hide anything from me, I can try on me again" I said. JJ turned to see herself in the mirror while fixing her hairs.

"I'm not leaving Reid alone now" She said.

"Did Hotch catch something?" I asked pulling my wheelchair closer to the sink now.

"Yes. If I were Morgan I would never want this party to end" She let out a sarcastic laugh and talked to my reflection in the mirror.

"I can't believe so much happened and I was lying in that dam hospital!" I almost talked to myself.

"Emily, I can take in everything but I can't see a man crying" JJ inhaled loudly. The expression on her face clearly explained the seriousness of the Reid's situation. He needed help with something which he won't tell anyone about. I wondered if he open up to me and cry out all his fears and pains.

JJ and I both remained quiet trying to understand members of our team so tangled up with complications.

"I think we should head back" JJ said and we returned to the party with classical music was blasting the night sky. Couples were dancing along each other, Rossi Erin, Morgan Garcia, and many other guests swinging to the love tunes. And then there were Hotch and Reid sitting watching all the chaos. We joined them and Hotch felt better eyeing my dress for any spots.

"Look at Morgan; I thought he had an injured leg!" JJ smiled pointed to our womanizer. I couldn't hold myself from looking at Reid so focused on Morgan. He didn't acknowledge any of us here and that face reflected so many questions, it was impossible to not see them.

**Morgan POV…**

The soft twitches in my leg muscles were enough to distract me away from dancing with my star baby girl. I span her for one last time before looking back at our team. JJ was persuading Reid to share a dance with her but he was reasoning out as far as I could see.

Did that boy even realize how easily he flips our world upside down? I knew for rest of my life, I would never be able to forget the words he just said. And, God knows how much Hotch heard! He was coming after me for sure and I needed hell lot of explanations now!

"Morgan, you don't wanna continue?" Garcia's voice echoed me out from my thoughts.

"It's just…my muscle is twitching a little" I over-exaggerated the situation.

"Sure honey take a seat, I am gonna get a new partner, and that too our slick and slim doctor!" Garcia smirked evilly leaving the dance floor to get Reid here.

In few minutes, Garcia won the battle against Reid and pulled him to his feet. Both walked past me holding hands. Garcia's extra ordinary high heels put her near Reid's height making her height ideal for his dance partner. I couldn't hold my smile seeing how bad he was at dancing. He sure seemed very conscious. I joined Emily who was busy scanning out genius from head to toe. There was something in that stare that was so new.

"Emily, are you planning to eat him or something?" I mocked and she elbowed me hard.

"Shut up! I was seeing how bad his dancing can get" Emily reasoned out.

"Come on, don't lie now there girl" I said.

"You want the truth?" She asked.

"Wohhoo! Is there actually a truth to this?" I became confused.

"Truth comes at a price. Deal?" she emotionlessly offered.

"What deal?"

"You need to tell me a truth too?" She demanded.

"What truth? Is this like a truth or dare game?" I asked afraid of how much she profiled so far.

"Truth about you and Reid's fight" She lightly spoke breaking me in half with tension. I am not telling her anything.

"What? There's nothing to tell!" my mind started coming up with some ideas.

"Morgan, what did you do that fired him so much?" She asked more blunt this time.

"You think I'm alone all responsible for this! HELL NO!" I answered back little angrily.

She remained quiet to stare me down. I rolled my eyes at her and turned away to face the dancing couples again. Reid was actually amused while dancing lightly to the tunes with Garcia by his side.

"Your silence's telling great stories" Emily spoke after a while also looking over at the dance.

"Why do you want to know?" I asked without looking at her.

"Why do you not want to tell?"

"I already made that mistake once, I'm not doin'it again!"

"Mistake?" she repeated "telling me all that was a mistake"

"What're you saying?" I asked for clarification. She was acting so suspicious now.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16: The Confront**

**Morgan POV**

Before she could answer, Garcia and Reid were returning back to us. Emily made this whole situation so much worse. What if she asked Reid? I will be dead surely!

"Few lessons and you will be rocking that stage like a real star" Garcia chatted with Reid.

"You actually think I'm going to waste my time in that" Reid answered.

"Well, not arguing up with you" She replied.

I couldn't digest the uncomfortable talk with Emily. I got up to excuse myself away.

"Morgan, where are you going?" Emily asked.

"I need another drink" I said.

"You're drinking in this condition?" Reid asked.

"What condition, I am totally fine!"

"I advise you shouldn't"

"Keep your advice to yourself, I'm not interested!" I snarled out.

"Boy, whats up with you two?" Garcia became more concerned or should I say more conscious.

"Nothing, I was just—" Reid said

"I was just interfering in other people's lives, right Reid?" I asked back feeling I was losing all my control, boiling since two days. I had enough. I was afraid I would ruin this delightful party very soon.

"Derek darling!" Garcia stepped closer "what's happening with you two?"

"Are you going to speak or should I tell the rest myself?" I threatened Reid completely losing my temper.

His eyes suddenly became teary and with nervousness he started to bite his lips.

"Tell us what?" Emily asked Reid this time. Reid fisted, his eyes set on me.

"Emily, he won't say anything. Had he got all the guts he would have told you all that in the first place and not rely on my shoulders all the time" I yelled out. People started noticing around.

Reid quickly moved real close to me and whispered.

"So this is how you want to play this now! I feel so disgusted knowing you can fall this low. Everyone is the same, the whole world, the whole universe, every galaxy, do nothing but break me every time I try to live again. I don't blame anyone but me! I am too foolish to even exist. I wish I was dead before this day had come!" he spoke while grinding his teeth. The whisper was so low that I doubted that even Garcia could hear him.

He walked past me fast ignoring all calls and attention the gathering was now giving him.

"SPENCER!" JJ called from a side but he continued walking out of the party before anyone could react. All the anger rising in me fell back so hard; I became dizzy thinking how worse I had made this.

Reid walked out on all of us, not just me! I stood there stunned at myself. I didn't know how I was going to live with myself.

**Reid POV….**

Who said this world was worth living? Why must all my hopes be smashed like this? No one knows how hard I taught myself to live, and keep on living, but every time a stimuli undid all my learning and I could do nothing but think about dying.

Loneliness was even tired of me! Who could save me now? My saviour became the devil today! Every neuron inside my head denied that Morgan could do this to me, that too in front of a whole party.

I didn't know how I walked past that party into my car and drove away. I felt I will lose my strength and fall in the way but now I was driving fast with pacing cars all living their lives.

The dark sky and city lights blurred out as tears filled my eyes. I tried to blink them away but my translucent vision remained.

Would anyone even care if I was no more tomorrow? The depression took over me and I surrendered. I didn't know where I was driving but it wasn't home. I had no home! I never had a home! Home is where your family is but I had no family. In that moment, I wished I hadn't killed Tobias or William stopping them from killing me. At least I would have died a death of hero.

My phone started to ring constantly. I pulled it from my pocket and threw it to back seat. I wanted to escape everything, everyone and run away to heaven.

I quickly parked my car and walked past to the Virginia Beach. The bright white moon was cursing me, the sand beneath my shoes resisting my footsteps. I sat down and pulled my knees to my head and hid.  
This party was going so perfect & Morgan destroyed it all. Even the whispers were gone from my head as long as Emily was near me. I was so overwhelmed few minutes ago on how much effect she was having on me. I wished I could translate my emotions into memories so I could feel them back again. She was a powerful inspiration in my lifeless life but maybe never again would I be able to face her.

She knows everything now. She must've thought I'm the weakest man on the planet.

"_Weakling, she is so right!" _

The whispers returned and my already exhausted life was giving up. I stayed there for hours, listening, denying, crying at no one but whispers of my own wind, so real, no one could deny they never existed.

**Emily POV…**

For few minutes, chaos settled in. Everyone fumbling and mumbling around, embarrassed, sad and depress. The triumph of happiness fell so hard.

I couldn't believe Morgan lost it that bad! I stood in front of him with questions striking from every cell. I just wanted to know why he acted this way, why he reacted so mean, why? His eyes were teary, the tough man falling with shame. Morgan needed to answer, lots and lots of questions. Rossi and Garcia did their best to bring the atmosphere back down but what happened had left us all in shock. Hotch went back to grab another drink while JJ kept calling Reid.

"He's not picking up" JJ said worriedly to me.

"Let me try as well" I answered and took my phone out to do so. The dial tone kept ringing rising the fear level with it.

"No chance!" I ended the call. JJ gave a blank stare before picking her purse up to leave.

"I have to go after him, sorry" JJ called Henry and left shortly after. This party became even more difficult without them.

The dessert was served and I sat beside Morgan who was desperately broken up.

"Morgan?" I called him out of his thoughts, staring sadly at the cake. He looked up with red eyes.

"This can't get any worse than this" He lightly said.

"So what happened?" I asked nicely.

"Emily, I am just so sorry! I wish I could go back in life" he said as every word out of his mouth cried.

"Is this about Reid's feeling for me?" I asked bravely surprised from where the courage was coming from. He looked up to me.

"I never thought he would mind it this much" he said.

"You know he's sensitive, he's private"

"I just wanted your reaction for him"

"And what did you get?" I asked curiously.

"Not good" he answered. My heart skipped a beat realizing how I first reacted when Morgan expressed what Reid couldn't.

"He never asked for your response, he never gave me the chance, he just got so angry, so mad" He continued "it's like he's not even curious of how you reacted"

"So he never wanted me to know?" I asked while playing with the cream on the cake.

"Yes, he's afraid you would reject his feelings maybe" He added "I guess he can profile you at least this much"

"Like how?"

"Like you are not interested"

"But if he never wanted me to know, to react, to respond then why bother with all the feelings, confessions and everything" I confusedly asked Morgan.

"He's scared of himself"

"Why?"

"He thinks his future is dark, with schizophrenia running in his genes, he's afraid that he will ruin himself and others with him. He told me once, love is with mind and if someone losses the possession of mind, they lose love with it" Morgan's word hit my heart so hard. I never rejected Reid's feeling in the first place. I agree I didn't take them serious but somehow in last few days everything feels different. Like all those feelings really mean a whole lot more to me now. All of a sudden, I care. 'Why' was the only question blazing my soul.


	17. Chapter 17

_**Sorry for a late chapter, I was lost in my final exams…but here is the next chapter, hopefully the story will pace up in the coming week as I am totally free! _

**CH 17: LOST & FOUND**

**Emily POV**

Morgan and I got into the car and headed home. Streets were dark, empty as night completely engulfed the city. I felt so heavy at heart. I was waiting for this party for so long, to meet my fellows but this ending was never anticipated.

Then, I remembered how much this night valued. I got to see that smile and cherish it forever. Replaying all those moments in my mind again and again while car paced on. We both remained silent until my phone finally broke the trance.

"Hi—JJ?" I answered

"Reid's not home, I am tired of calling him, he's not answering!" She alarmed us.

"O Damn it! Where can he go at this hour?" Morgan loudly banged his fist on the steering wheel.

"Please guys, we need to find him. I'm not having good thoughts" JJ spoke in the speaker.

"He has nowhere to go" I added.

"I don't care I'm not resting until I find him!" Morgan exclaimed loudly.

"Do you want me to let Hotch and Rossi know?" JJ asked before hanging up.

"Leave them out of this for now!" Morgan abruptly replied and drove even faster.

"This can't be happening!" Morgan yelled again.

"Calm down Derek" I ordered him.

"NO, I WONT FORGIVE MYSELF!" he loudly yelled.

"Where are we going to search?" I asked.

"I gonna drop you off first"

"NO! I'm not going anywhere!"

"You still need rest" he told me.

"No, I don't. I'm staying here to look for Reid"

"You don't need to"

"What do you mean?"

"Emily PLEASE!" he yelled.

"I want to help, what's wrong?" I asked. He parked the car outside my mom's house.

"Morgan, I said I don't want to go home. We need to find him and not waste our time like this". He ignored whatever I said and stepped out of the car to get my wheelchair ready for me. He opened my side door to let me out.

"Can't you hear me? I don't wanna go!" I spoke harshly.

"Emily, I am not losing another friend here" He sadly said.

"Me too!"

We kept staring each other for a while until Morgan's phone rang.

"Hi, JJ what's new?" He asked keeping his tone neutral. I interpreted what she might be saying on the other line by studying his gestures.

"Reid has no other place to go, he must be still driving somewhere" he suggested her.

"I'll get Garcia to trace his number" He mentioned and ended the call only to phone his baby girl now.

Garcia had hardly got the time to get home before starting her search. We started to drive away in the streets looking for our missing friend.

I didn't know what was happening within my mind. I was apprehensive. Wish I could save him from all the negative thoughts that occupy him so often. If I can only find him now, I will never leave him alone again. I will be like his shadow protecting him from all his fears.

Reid had recently bought a car finally after such long time so our eyes were scanning every street, road and motorway for his black Mercedes. The stillness slowly eating up the passengers in our car…we were tired but frustrated.

The whole night we kept searching every possible place, Morgan even decided to call Hotch but no one picked up. He was sleeping a little too deeply. So, we continued without his support.

Garcia stayed up late trying to track his phone but he probably turned it off so that plan also went out of the window.

Finally when we couldn't keep our eyes open for more than few seconds, we realized we had to quiet the search for now. The morning was slowing approaching as we drove back to Reid's apartment to just check one last time for his existence. That too was in vain.

At last, we reached my mother's house where we decided to drift off for a little while to get our heads back on the search. Hours passed by, very fast but no connection established with our dear genius.

**Reid POV…**

The night sky twinkling right into my eyes, my legs tired of work. I don't know how I managed to get here finally, a place which puts me to most peace possible, and a place where I end this all tonight. I got out of my car, taking in the deadly sight, I started walking, each step regretting the previous one, but I kept the pace.

Once this all haunted me so much but tonight was different, nothing scared me anymore. I was determined, tired, and weak. I just needed this now, and right now!

The moon, so clear this night, it clearly enlightened my path and it was in the air, in the atmosphere, sometime was about to change, a big change, I could sense it.

The cold breeze of the night tickled my nose and a shiver waved up to my body. The cold feeling crept up old memories, the same freezing room, with frozen Emily, a psychopath, but he too lost love. Form this case I learnt bitter lessons, betrayal in love could generate such monsters, I never imagined. Love was powerful but I never experienced its strength that close before, how could one still long for love then.

A scream, knocking me out of my thoughts, sirens, ambulances, and noises….I stopped where I was but the sounds got closer. In the dark night, all the emergency vehicles were approaching toward me. I hesitated, not knowing what was about to happen.

**Morgan's POV…**

_I am hurt, I am broken because one person that I trusted more than myself, that one person who I cared and needed the most in life, betrayed me._

Even in my sleep, I could hear his voice over and over again, telling me, blaming me, haunting me.

_Morgan, I miss you, I miss us._

The pain in his voice shook me out of my deepest sleep and I suddenly stood up to realize it was all but a dream. There is a limit to how much one can drown in guilt, my case was beyond that. I failed to understand why I was being so misunderstood. My intention was nothing but to see all of us happy, then why must I go through this agony. I knew I did no harm so I should anticipate for good times ahead. The only tense full part was the mental state of Reid's nowadays. Where has he gone?

I managed to sit back on the couch going over his possible hiding spots. None came to mind, he never did that before, but I should be able to profile him right. I started to think how he was feeling when he left the party, sad, betrayed, and embarrassed. He maybe wants to be alone for some time to get his mind straight again.

The phone rang. It was Hotch's number. I tensed. Here we go with the scolding.

"Hell-lo!" I managed to speak to my boss.

"Morgan—why didn't you tell me last night what happened? Since when have you and Emily started to hide things from our team? Do you think you can manage on your own? You knows how you are been acting since you got from William's case? I want answers and clear explanations now!" He questioned nonstop.

"Look Hotch, I don't know what's bothering you so much about my behaviour?" I asked.

"Don't play tricks on me. I saw you confronting Reid last night, you cornered him. I don't tolerant bullies in my team. I want to know what's causing' all the chaos." He asked.

"Hotch, I will tell you everything after but right now I need to find him." I said as Emily entered right into the room all sleepy on her wheelchair.

"You don't need to do anything now! Garcia traced his cell in the morning. He's in Vegas" Hotch informed and life returned to me. At least he was safe. I hated myself for thinking such negative situations regarding him.

"Thanks Hotch!" I unconsciously replied happily.

"So? What's all the trouble about?" He went on.

"I can assure you it's nothing very big, just a friendly argument between us. Please give us some time and let us try fixing it ourselves."

"You're saying it's nothing big? As far as I know, Reid can never be this rude to exit a party for a mere issue as you are portraying it to be." Hotch said. I shifted my gaze back to Emily who was now beside me.

"Hotch, please try to understand me, I can make it better. Trust me" I tried to reassure him to find my way out for now. Thank God, Hotch was such an understanding man! I placed my phone back in my pocket. I relieved Emily too telling her our Genius was safe.

She kept quiet thinking, I could sense all her feelings so close. Was she really turning toward him now? I took my phone out again and dialled Reid. The tone kept ringing, but no one picked up. His ignorance was doing the trick, burning me inside out. I had suffered enough punishment! I wanted to apologize, maybe get on my knees, potentially cry, until all of this ends. I ended the call and threw the phone aside.

"You want me to give it a try?" Emily asked. I looked up at her with tired eyes.

"Emily, what's the point? You need to get your head clear first!" I said and left her house to get home. My leg muscles kept twitching from all the stressed it suffered last night. All I needed was a warm bath and loneliness.

**Emily POV…**

The sun reached it max height, I sat near my window staring out the world that continued to blossom. I had nothing in mind but what Morgan told me. I had to think clear of what I wanted. After all, all this chaos was because of me.

I sat back finally away from my wheelchair. I held my hands up to see the white bandages covering the wounds. I lost all my fingertips; the regeneration was still in jeopardy. William took all my confidence and fingers away, but he gave me something in return that I was constantly lost in.

I was cold, Reid became my heat, I was sad, he became my tears, I was lost, he became my hope, I was death and he became my life. Were these reasons not enough to make my decision?

For all my life, I was nothing but independent. I had seen enough to learn to never rely on anything, anyone. Accepting Reid would mean relying on him, depending on him, longing for him, desiring him. Was I ready to surrender to a man? If I didn't I might end up alone all my life.

Love, was a path full of pricks and flowers. Was I ready to pick those pricks up to get to the flower? I doubted myself. It was so hard to convince my ego that it was time to trust someone with life.

No, I won't risk my life yearning for someone's love. I can't choose this path. The answer became clear in my mind, Love was dangerous and I was scared to love, anything, anyone, even Reid.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18: A Friendless World**

**Reid POV…**

I sat beside her bed, she still was sleeping. No one but she understood the world I was living in. She seemed so peaceful, like sleep provided the perfect buffer to diffuse all her worries. She reflected what I ought to be. She was my future which I resisted.

I decided to let her stay in peace and moved out of my mother's room. I made my way to the main longue in search of coffee, my head pounding with the addition. There, I spotted Marleen who I just met last night. I quickly walked over to the coffee table to make two hot cups. Then, grabbing the hot coffee I strolled over to her.

"Want some coffee?" I asked as she looked up with eyes full of bags under it. She looked all broken up. She silently took one cup away from my hand.

"Again, just what I needed" She smiled faintly and reminded of the night where the chaos broke.

As the emergency vehicles made their way toward me, I started to panic. Was sometime wrong at the asylum? My mother's health suddenly blew all previous thoughts away as I ran inside to inquire how my mother was.

Inside, the lobby was full of staff and medical personals running in absolute bizarre manner. It was 3 in the morning and this place was totally alive at this hour. Upon inquiry, I realized a patient, fortunately not my mother, underwent a cardiac arrest. The old man in his 70's was brought out in the lobby as taker cares helped. That's, when I first saw Marleen running wild with fear, screaming and shouting for her father dying. She tripped over while running and landed right in front of my feet. I quickly bent over to pick her up. She was a total mess, someone so much in distress for a loved one that she didn't realize who was helping her get back up. She grabbed my upper arms, trembling with the sudden shock. Tears smearing any makeup she wore, and she suddenly hugged me.

I had no time to react; she started to sob loudly on my shoulder. I wanted to back off, resist the intrusion by a stranger but there was this realization. Someone could be even sadder than me?

In that distress moment, I let her cry out. The tears slowly damping my shirt, and it was enough to forget all the whispers I had ever heard.

In few minutes, she regained her composure. She pulled back and now staring at my face.

"I'm sorry!" She said looking at the mark her makeup left on my shirt.

"No problem" I answered back and she wiped her nose and eyes.

"I just can't lose my dad now, I—I need him to stay until I'm alive" She chocked as she spoke.

"He'll be fine, but you need to sit down first" I pushed all my worries out to take worries of a stranger in place.

"No, he's not gonna recover now!" She sadly answered almost to herself.

"No one controls the accidents that occurs in their lives, sadly we have to overcome them ourselves" I replied back trying to stop her from crying.

Just then a nurse came running toward us.

"Dr. Marleen, they have taken him to emergency; I say you stay here until there's any new report" She informed and left.

"You work here?" I asked as she chose to sit back on the chair near the wall of the lobby. She pushed her hairs behind her ears and nodded.

"I'm a psychiatrist here; you don't seem like a patient here, you must be a visitor" She cleared her voice.

"I'm here to meet my mom, Diana Reid" I let her know but her mind was drifting away to her father's worries. She remained quiet for a moment.

"We don't allow visitors this late" She said "I guess you have to until the morning."

"I can wait" I answered not knowing why I even choose to come here.

"If you don't mind can I ask you something?" She said.

"No, no go ahead" I replied.

"How'd you got the wound on you head, it's bandaged up"

"Oh, it's a long combat story, I work in the FBI so an Unsub- I mean a criminal and I had a little fight, luckily I survived" I replied hesitantly not knowing how much to tell a stranger.

"No way, you don't look the fighting type" She smiled for the first time.

"Ahh, I know but when it's your love at stack—I mean life at stack, the survival instincts kick back" I bit my lips realizing how much I was troubling to just talk probably at this hour. She amusingly looked at me.

_People don't time realizing your stupidity. _

The words lightly whispered in my mind. I knew I had to get away from this psychiatrist before she reads me off too well. I started to fidget not knowing how to end this conversation.

"I guess who are tired, it was nice meeting you, I must a take a leave now" I said and started to walk away.

"Not until you tell me your name" She said from behind. I turned around more ashamed.

_A sore loser is definition of you! _Another Whisper.

"I'm loser- I mean Spencer!" I stumbled on my words. She smiled a little more. I continued to look down, afraid she might know what's happening in my head.

"Nice meeting you Spencer!" She offered her handshake to me. I hesitated first.

_Coward, afraid, all the time, come on Spencer you are so ridiculous. _

I shook her hand fast and retrieved.

"You're just what I needed at this time! Thanks for everything" She said.

I spent all the remaining night in the launch waiting for sun to rise again. I felt I lost my control over myself for first time, letting those whispers decide where I will go next; they got me here, to meet my mom. I knew listening to them would mean forgetting reality, then why did I make this mistake.

Now, sitting in the launch sipping coffee, I smiled at her. She looked much weaker than last night, it was a drastic change.

"I'm glad I met you Spencer" She smiled back at me.

"You know life is so precious cause when it's about to come to an end, you realize there's so much more due still. You can't make up your mind up to let go that easily" She said.

"Come to an end?" I asked.

"I am in acute blast phase of leukemia" She answered and I went blank "so any new opportunity, every new thing, every new person in my leftover life is so precious to me now" She sipped her coffee. I gave her another look, her body so thin, she looked sick and her words punctured my suicidal thoughts.

"I will be happy to consider you my friend for few days that I have" She said in a questioning tone.

"Yes, sure" I answered back.

"Really? I never had a friend before, so that can be checked out in my checklist now" She smiled and her eyes already so dead cheered up.

**Morgan POV…**

I let JJ in and Henry in. She sat on my sofa while he started running towards the TV.

"Mom, cartoons?" he asked and she nodded and there goes my TV amusing the little kid for a while. I sat beside her, she looked mad.

"He's in Vegas" I said. She kept looking straight.

"Morgan, you didn't have to yell at him like that" She said.

"I am sorry for what I did. I was just so out of control, so mad that he was ignoring me…I know I played a dirty trick" I answered her.

"You have any idea what he did after that day you fought and left his place! He overdosed on pills!" She angrily looked at me now.

"He threw me out of this house" I said.

"Derek Morgan, I know it wasn't entirely your fault. I'm not here to discuss who's at blame. I am overly worried about his health and mental stability and need to know how to work all this out now" JJ spoke harshly. She was too protective of him.

"You tell me what I should do. How can I make it up to him again?" I pleaded.

"Morgan, it's not you! I'm afraid he's hiding something from us. He can never do such a thing on a childish argument, he's that sensible enough" she said.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"He was blasting his ears with loud music when I first found in the bed, it's like he trying to avoid something, distracting his mind or…I don't know" She sadly said.

I felt trapped in the paradox, feeling happy that it was not entirely my fault for his condition but very sad that I failed to help my dearest friend. I took my phone out to deal with sudden urge to connect with him.

I wrote: the loneliest person in the world has no friend.

I knew he won't reply but still hoped my phone would beep soon.

I wrote: losing your friendship would be equivalent to loneliness for rest of my life. I am deeply sorry for what I've done.

JJ read the desperation on my face as I threw my phone away. I felt tears rising in my eyes. I was the tough guy of the team, I knew how to drink tears, and I couldn't break in front of them. I tried to blink my tears away. I exhaled in loudly sadly staring at my phone, hoping it would beep now, now, now…but it stayed silent like rest of me. JJ put her arm around my shoulder and I lost all my strength, I was emotional.

"JJ, why can't he reply? Have I committed such a sin that I even don't deserve a response?" my voice cracked as I whined. Tears and my will battling out the outcome, I closed my eyes.

"I—I am sorry beyond words, I have no energy left to bear his bitterness anymore" I let out as tears won the battle and slid down my face. I was crying I was hurt, sad and lonely knowing my greatest treasure; my friend ignored me so harshly.

"Oh no dear, come on, I can't imagine you like this" JJ lifted my head up lightly. I cried even loud feeling a relief. I felt so guilty, it melted my heart.

Henry quickly ran over and stood in front me. His eyes widened. His tiny cute hands wiped my tears away tickling my face.

"Uncle Derek, you got a booboo?" He asked tilting his head.

I hugged Henry and try to stop my tears from releasing anymore internal shame. I felt mad how one person, who was stranger once to me, now could mould me into such a weak person. I felt so weird knowing how powerful of a friend he was. I closed my eyes and thought it was my friend who I was hugging rather than Henry. I felt happy realizing he was here with me.

Nothing could break Derek Morgan, but a broken friendship.

…..

_***Please let me know whose Point of View you are enjoying the most in the reviews. Thanks a lot for reading. **_____


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19: OLD TIMES**

**Emily POV…**

It was time for my doctor's appointment; they will be opening the bandages up to see how my fingers are doing. I got ready and waited for my Aunt to do the same. It had been two days since Reid had gone to Vegas. I didn't get to see Morgan and JJ either.

I was bored, so bored in the house I could feel my legs wanting to leave that chair and start running a 100 miles race. I took my phone out to see the screen background picture of our team posing on the beach. It reminded me of the last summer when we planned this trip to south beaches. It was out of the world feeling to relive the memories through that picture.

The sun shining down on our bodies with colourful beach attires, I smiled remembering how all the guys got together and picked JJ up to throw her in a water wave.

"What's causing this big smile on your face dear?" I heard my Aunt's voice; she was standing beside me staring at the same picture.

"Old fun times" I told her and clicked my phone back.

"Ready to leave?" she asked and I followed.

The appointed didn't last too long. Doctor quickly examined my fingers first and then my toes. I was eager to walk again but doctor hesitated not allowing me to put pressure on that in injured area. I was impatient to recover and join my team back to solving some more crimes up.

Team was weak without the trio but they had to work. They called in two substitute agents to lead them on the next case. Hotch, JJ, Garcia and Rossi were off to New York.

After we finished with the check-up, with all the insisting Doctor finally allowed me off the wheelchair and I took the cane to support the weight off. My foot felt weird at first but I was ready to take this on.

On the way home, I told Aunt to drop me off at Morgan's place. Before actually entering his place, I one last time tried to call Reid. And as expected, he didn't answer. I wondered if he was mad at me too.

I knocked and Morgan let me in. He was still in his pyjamas watching baseball league all by himself. I chose to give him company for remainder of the game and enjoyed popcorns.

Morgan showed his delight that I was not on that wheelchair 'cart' anymore. So, after the game we talked and talked for hours about everything, until it was time for lunch. We planned to make something ourselves, baking chicken and potatoes with chicken noodle soup. Odd pairing, we were the kings of it.

We sat together to gulp everything down, I felt so fresh after ages to be able to walk around and enjoy what I ate.

"Time for dessert, huh?" Morgan winked at me. Usually, whenever we had dinner together, Reid chose the desserts and mostly ate that only!

The word dessert was enough to send both us on tangents of different memories of all three of us eating together, laughing, teasing, pranking and of course watching the game at Morgan's place.

Just last month, all three of us decided to visit Reid's favourite place to dine in. Of course, he ordered so many sweets. Reid left only to use washroom for a while and here Morgan was adding chilli sauce to Reid's too sweet drink.

"Wait and watch" Morgan told me that time. I couldn't hold back my laugh. As predicted, Reid came and did not take a sip but gulped down the drink. The next second, he spewed all his drink right on Morgan's clothes. I was the only one dying with laughter. Even now, old times brought back the same laughter.

"What are you laughing at?" Morgan asked sipping up his last bits of chicken soup.

"Oh, I remembered something funny" I told me.

"Wanna share the laugh?" He asked. I never wanted to bring this up; I knew he will become even sad realizing the loss. About then, Morgan's phone beeped. He was startled looking at the id.

"It is Reid's reply" He told me happily and continued on to read. His faced started to display confusing expressions.

"What did he say?" I asked

"He wrote 'I agree', just two words. I understand why is he being so mean to me but I am seriously tired of his behaviour. He thinks we can run after him all the time and after we are exhausted he throws a small piece of bone at us. What does he think he is?" Morgan placed his phone back.

"Emily, he knows how bad ignorance burns, like a first degree burn! He doesn't stop!" he sure was again becoming mad. It was usual for Morgan to display his sadness in anger. The place, the time and environment he grew up taught him that. I never blamed him of anything.

"Morgan, you the one running after him, expecting replies, anticipating, but it won't work this way" I advised him.

"Emily, you can say that so easily. Have you thought your few words can fix this all in matter of minutes" He said.

"Are you forcing me to do something I don't want to?" I asked.

"Tell me Emily, who can't like the adorable, smart and professional that Reid is! What is he lacking?" Morgan desperately asked.

"I like him" I replied.

"But do you love him?" Morgan's word threw my world around. I sat on my chair, holding my head in my hands.

"Cause, I know for a fact that he does!" Morgan spoke and fisted.

"If he really wanted something, he could have told me himself but he didn't. He's not ready just like me" I said confusedly.

"You don't know, girl" he said.

"Morgan, I can read his expressions!" I commented.

"You have no idea, how much he is inspired by you, how much he admires and observes you day and night, work or vacation; he constantly desires you in his thoughts. Confession and words are not as strong as deep genuine love. I can't think of a reason you can reject someone like him. If I was in your place girl, we would be married by now" Morgan's emotional speech exhausted me. I didn't know if I was ready to give in. All I needed was time.

"I need time to think over" I told him.

"Go ahead, just don't be too late!" He stood off his chair and put his dirty dishes in the sink. He turned around and leaned against the shelf looking at me.

"Just remember, love is way more powerful than any form of fear!" His words hit me right on.

I kept going over our conversation while trying to sleep at night. I needed to know, search those emotions and feelings that I might even be hiding from myself. Closing my eyes, I longed for that reassuring smile, that warming life-returning touch slowly drifting me away from all the confusions of the world.

**Reid POV…**

"Spencer!" My mom scolded me.

"It's not as bad as it looks. Aren't you happy I tackled an Unsub all by myself?" I asked my worrying mom.

"I don't like you doing such dangerous things all the time" She complained.

"I get it mom but you know I am good at it" I said back. She shook her head and looked away.

"So Morgan and Prentiss were stuck with you too" she eyed me again. I nodded.

"How are they now?" She asked.

"Ah, they are fine I guess" I replied. My mom tilted her head and nodded while observing me. I hesitated.

"Is there something wrong baby?" She asked keenly. I opened my mouth to say something but then decided not to.

"Why were you here so late in the night?" she asked another question.

"I just wanted to see you" I rubbed my forehead answering.

_Spencer, are you lying to your mother, shame on you! When will you learn, pathetic!_

"This late at night?" She asked "What are you hiding under that big brain of yours?"

"Mom, I'm just little exhausted. That's all, I was missing you so I decided to visit. I know it was an odd time but-" I said.

"The truth? Spencer" She made a pissed off face.

_How dare you speak so ill?_

I hated those voices in my head, always confusing me while I was trying to think straight. I didn't know how to answer her anymore.

"I think I should get some lunch for both of us" I said and started to get off the couch to leave. I opened the door and heard my mom say "Don't fight with your friends". I was dumbfounded yet again with her skills. She always knew what was bothering me, like our minds were somehow connected. I froze at that position realizing why I chose to came here.

It's because she knew me too dam well! It was only with her when I could be myself again.

…

_***Heads up! Story is going to reach its climax soon! I hope you are ready for it! I am very thankful to each and individual reader and sorry for few typos in the previous chapter. **_


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20: The Voices**

**Morgan POV…**

Few days went by; I joined my therapist working on my strain leg muscle so I could start my field duty soon. I was actually looking forward to join the team again. The two weeks break was more than enough for me to recover.

Today, finally I got out of house to get back to work after William crippled us for a long time. Hotch called us in only for paper work today but at least I was going to be productive again rather than breaking my couch at home. I loved my job, my workplace; I felt alive again to bring justice to many dead ones.

At this rush hour, employees and all federal workers were running up and down the building to start up yet another day. I got to my desk and placed my bag down. Across me, the desk was still untouched. Reid hadn't arrived yet.

"Oh my bubbly boy is back!" Garcia in her very bright pink dress walked right over to my desk. I nodded faintly.

"Oh, what's this? Looks like this chocolate thunder needs some cheering up huh" She presented me with a hot cup of coffee. Her eyes glittering with all the makeup, she made this sad world so happy. I lost my inner glee the day I told Emily everything and but my smile still belonged to my baby girl.

"We are meeting up in 5 minutes" JJ walked in from the door loaded with files and her bag. She ran to set up for the collaboration.

"Meet yah around" Garcia followed JJ and the girls got lost in their talks. I took another deep breathe and told myself let's get this day started.

A loud thud and there Reid placed his satchel on the desk. I looked up at our boy genius after so many days. He looked fresh and all happy. He had his work smile. I just realize how much I longed for him. He flipped through some papers, placing them around his desk, preparing for work. I knew his routine too well to predict what was coming. He would be going off for a quick coffee break before heading to team meeting.

"Good Morning Genius!" I let out but he just walked past me, like my voice had no sound. I turned around to see and he kept walking away from my sight until Emily entered the scene. I chased her eyes chasing Reid as he exited the room. She saw me and smiled heart-brokenly. I joined her and together made our way to the round table. JJ was setting up the slide show while Garcia placing the files nicely on the table.

"So good to have to yah all back!" Garcia cheered seeing Emily with me. She walked around to grab the tray full of colourful mini cupcakes.

"So to celebrate this special comeback, here is some treats to sweeten up your mouths" she said.

"You need a reason to bake" Emily laughed off and took one herself.

"Oh God! Baking is my stress relieving hobby but it's too pricey you know I'm gaining more weight!" she explained. Just then, Reid entered wearing the same smile on his face.

"Reid, have some!" Garcia presented happily and he took one.

"Thank you!" he replied and sat down. I followed and chose the seat beside him.

"You had real good vacation boy, how was Vegas?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, how was your mother?" Garcia asked.

"Everything is good" He answered to her smiling but again ignoring me. I gave Emily a stare before she sat down too. Hotch and Rossi arrived together.

"Welcome back team, let's get started!" Hotch started right away. JJ presented the case. I felt so lonely, even while sitting so close to my dearest friend. I looked under the table; Reid's feet were close so I gently kicked his feet. The agent so lost scanning the pictures on the screen suddenly shifted around at the unexpected contact and changed his position now moving farther away.

I wanted to do something again but I hesitated. I had no idea which state was my friend still residing.

Hotch told the team to wheels up in 15 minutes. I, Emily and Reid were supposed to stay back and work from here with Garcia.

We got back to our desk. Emily acted all cool and started right away with her work list. Reid too got lost in his work. I opened the file in front of me and stared at it for a while. The silence between my desk and the one across killed me from inside. I remember how the chatter box will go on and on talking, sharing his ideas, views and statistics. I looked up at him trying to read something fast.

The innocent face hides so many emotions so perfectly; sometimes it made me wonder do people like him really exist. The time I had with him was incomparable to any other moment.

From a colleague to a fellow, to a friend and now so much more that I couldn't explain it to myself. Who was he to me? I kept staring at the purity that this face radiated. He looked up, so much questions in his eyes. He gulped down and stole his gaze away. Just then he phone rang.

"Hi! How are you?" He answered. I pretended to work but my focus was on his words. He then laughed a little.

"I am doing fine, thank you-OH… I usually finish around 6-Ok then, let me know if you need any help, see ya around" Reid ended the call and left me wondering. He had no friends but us; he had no family but his Aunt and Mom. He had no fellows but his thesis partner Marcus. And, he talked to none like how he just did over the phone, so frank so happy, like almost he was talking to one of us.

I went on with the work until it was lunch time. Usually on days like these, we ate together picking and choosing what to order or where to go but today it was silent.

Reid left off without anyone leaving me and Emily behind. She too wanted no lunch and continued typing up her reports. I was left with no choice but to order something for myself and eat alone at the headquarters' café. I sat there for a reason. I knew Reid would pass by here when he gets back to get his chewy bar before resuming his work.

I fixed my eyes on the entrance waiting while slowly chewing up my sandwich.

"_I am afraid to be so dependent on someone for rest of my life" _Emily just told me over phone few days ago. At that moment, I disregarded the point hidden in that fear. But now sitting so lonely and desperate for his entry, it screamed out Emily's fear clearly. She was afraid to be what I was today. I knew I was living in hell, missing someone so much like I was really sick for a long time now. She was afraid to burn in the fire of wait, desperation and inter-dependency. The only way to move on was to burn all bridges and never return, start a life with no expectations. But, it was all too late.

**Reid POV…**

I entered back the building and saw a sight which melted any core still remained inside of me. Morgan, with his head down, staring down at half eaten sandwich and lost in thoughts. He knew I walked here before returning to my desk. He was eating alone and waiting for me. God knows how much I wanted to run and sit beside him and forget everything. Before he before he could notice me, I turned around to leave. I missed him so much that I felt aimless and depress. He was the one who brought the light into my dark life, how could I forget how much he means to me?

Case after case, the true face of humanity shook my core. I started to hate myself for being called human. I remember how each case horrified me and made me feel so hopeless. Who was I in the seven billion to change anything? I was no one, nothing. We arrested one cruel being and another one was set on our desk, the never ending race drove me crazy, helpless, like everything I did, all the energy, all the time and life I spent chasing after monsters means nothing!

But, Morgan, my dearest friend Derek Morgan proved me wrong. People like him were the hope I thrived on.

"_You know, happiness is a choice. If you keep looking at this society with this view, you never gonna by happy." He once told me. _

"_How can I ignore the face so clear to me, how I forget and laugh again" I asked. _

I bent over the sink in the restroom thinking over all the replies he ever gave me. I was crying from inside feeling the same way again, helpless. I never choose to live, if I had a choice I rather be never born and remain nothing. All my life, I was surrounded with grief, pains, and sufferings. I had no one but my ill mother who at times left me too. For me happiness came with a heavy counterpart, sadness. For the sake of few cherished moments, I couldn't take the mental torture. But when Morgan and Emily entered my dead life, I started to view things differently. Their strong personalities brought me to life. And today, I was yet again empty, like how first my father, then Gideon and now they left me too.

_It's not them, it's you, no one can stand you. _

I stood still listening to myself whispering to me.

"Will you too leave me alone one day?" I asked the whispering voice.

_No, never. Even if you tried, it will be a mindless escape. _

"How can I trust you?" I asked.

"Because trust comes from within the core of your soul, you yourself know the answer" Morgan's voice rocked me and I turned around to see him. We stared at each other, questioning, answering each other's eyes! We needed no words. The pain was clear. I was helpless. I needed his help.

_Remember, he betrayed you and now Emily hates you._

"Morgan prove it wrong" I said.

"Prove what wrong?" He walked little closer now asking in the most concerning voice.

_Don't sell yourself to him, you don't need him!_

"I do!" I yelled. Morgan panicked.

"I don't understand what you're saying?" He asked.

_Don't fall apart, not now! You were doing well! Walk away! Let him burn!_

"I can't do it anymore!" I cried.

_He is a liar, betrayer, you can't get fooled again. _

"STOP!" I cried. Morgan grabbed me by my arms.

"REID, what's wrong?" He shook me a little.

_Don't let him break you, don't give yourself away!_

"AHHHH, please stop!" I fell to my knees and he grabbed me tight.

"REID!"

"Please…please" I lightly sobbed but whispers never stopped.

"REID! What the hell is happening to you?"

"Morgan, make it stop!" I begged.

"STOP WHAT?"

_Don't let him break you, don't give yourself away!_

I grabbed my ponding head wanting to smash it the nearest wall to end this.

"Pretty boy, talk to me!" Morgan yelled over the voices but it barely reached me.

_Don't let him break you, don't give yourself away!_

I tried to concentrate his voice, trying to understand what was real. Was Morgan not there, why can't he hear me anymore?

_Don't sell yourself to him, you don't need him!_

"Morgan?"

"MORGAN!" I called out. No one answered, it's kept getting noisier. I felt my ears will give up soon. Rapidly, there was nothing but seas of whispers. I didn't know where the world vanished or was my world all but illusion. The powerful hallucination exhausted down my nervous system. I felt as if someone was pulling me, gripping me…I had to run away. I pushed the incoming force and freeing myself to run away.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21: The Off Button**

**Reid POV…**

I ran back to my desk, trying to figure out what just happened. I knew I looked worn out. I regretted what just occurred. What if someone from this place saw me, I might lose my job!

I saw Morgan was still not here, was he with me there or had I imagined him. Frustration grew in me more.

_Run all you want but there is no place to hide. _

If, I only had a button to turn them off, I will be in heaven! I sat down in despair trying to recite the decimal numbers of pi in my head, anything to distract me. I knew my nose was red and the bile building up in my throat was burning me.

_Who can deny their mind! Don't play tricks._

My phone rang. It was Marleen calling from her hotel. Something to distract me for a while!

_Return to reality is only possible if you listen. _

"Hi Spencer, hope I am not disturbing you!" She asked.

_No one but I can help you._

"No, not at all, how was your visit to your Aunt's place?" I asked trying not to cry with all the mess in my head.

"Hi, is everything okay?" She asked possibly detecting something in my voice.

"Oh yes—I mean no, just work stress I guess" I lied.

_Hear me; nothing is as real as me. Can you deny that! _

"Oh ok, well the visit was okay, I haven't seen her in a while. I got the files doctors needed at the hospital. Dad's feeling much better now"

"Glad to know that"

"I am so happy that now I actually have someone to share things with" She said. I drank my tears away trying to sound normal.

_These worldly fake things cannot satisfy you, I have the key to peace. _

"I'm more than happy to be part of this" I replied.

_Stop running after this ruthless world. _

"Only a great person like you can fulfill the last wish of a dying stranger, thanks is not enough" She said. I knew I would lose my mind any minute now!

_I have the key to peace. _

"I was about to head back this evening, if it is okay with you and you can totally say no to this! I just wanted to see the FBI headquarters once in life!" She asked. I was in no shape or sense to let her come in here. I hesitated, getting mentally torture at the same time! My will power was giving up, I had no time to make up an excuse, I was about to cry!

"Like I said you can say no and I won't mind at all!" her cherish voice battled with my whispers, her voice was fading in the background now.

_Let everyone run over you!_

"Sure you can!" I said nothing that I meant. I couldn't hear her voice anymore.

"Hello, are you still there?" I asked.

"Yes, thank you so much, I will come by, possibly near the evening, don't want to disturb the normal work" I made most of it out but her sound was gone too. I turned around panicking and saw my mother was sitting on Morgan's desk looking over at me with a smirk. I closed my eyes. She is not real.

_Reality is perceived. Illusion is created, where you dwell is a creation, it's not real. _

"Meet you soon" I ended the call unaware of anything anymore. I smashed my already injured head on my desk. The loud bang that it must have created failed to reach me. Was I going deaf? I opened my eyes and saw my mother standing beside me.

_It will be okay, trust me, everything has an end in world, you just need to find it. _

I closed my eyes again trying so hard not to surrender. I felt a hand on my back. It sensed so real, I wanted to look back but I closed my eyes even tighter.

_I am the reality you are craving for._

I heard faint background noises, a female voice, calling me but the inner echoes were more powerful than ever.

_It will all be over soon, you just need to recognize. _

"Reid?" I recognized Emily's voice. I had to turn around. She stood beside me, her hand on my back, with most concerning looks in her eyes; she was here with me, caring for me. She was my dream that could never be translated to reality.

But, I wanted to never look away, her soothing eyes, the confidence searing out. I kept admiring how beautiful my dream looked, if illusion could be this satisfying I wouldn't mind letting go of reality. I was lost in her, the uproar of the whispers, echoes and sound started to quiet down, slowing fading under the sensory load of my sight.

Her gently eyes, her unforgettable scent lured me out of the blazing fire and I was suddenly so calm that it was unreal. Her stare slowly melted me defining once again the meaning of life, of dreams, of love. It went silent, like suddenly she just switched off all the whispers. I happily smiled at the most spectacular delusion I've created.

**Emily POV…**

His messy hairs, his desperate eyes, his being, and then there was his smile slowly deteriorating my heart. In that moment, time meant nothing no more, lost in my desires I longed nothing more to but touch the fantasy in front of me. The way he looked at me, ruined all my plans, all my strengths, all my future. I wanted to win him over, fight myself to get him. I was ready to break my ego to take him away.

"Agent Prentiss" Anderson's voice finally broke the romantic trance. I realized how close I was leaning near Reid. I quickly shifted and cleared my throat.

"Yes?" I asked.

"The fax is here" He handed me the papers that JJ just send from Detroit. He left afterward. My eyes were still burning from the sight they just witnessed. I had no energy left to look back and die. I heard something break inside me, my ego. I shifted back. Reid was now staring at his desk.

"I just wanted to know if everything was okay." I heard my voice sounding so strange to me.

"Thanks for asking" His voice was so weak, almost shaking with fear. Something inside me wanted to grab him, hug him until eternity.

Both of us not dared share another eye contact. I slowly walked away dazzled at my emotions.

_You have no idea, how much he is inspired by you, how much he admires and observes you day and night, work or vacation; he constantly desires you in his thoughts. Confession and words are not as strong as deep genuine love. I can't think of a reason you can reject someone like him._

I sat down on my seat feeling I just visited heaven and returned back to hell. Was I in love? I once again looked up to see Morgan was back looking my way. He looked scared. Maybe he saw us, dying for each other. I tried to return to work but nothing could make it feel better anymore, nothing could return the high I just experienced.

I would be lying if I said that I was working but the evening approached fast and it was time to leave. I gathered my stuff to leave.

Just then, she walks in. Her hairs messy and curly and were flowing around freely. At first glance, she reminded me of a professor but later her personality sort of contradicted it.

She walked over in her wedges smiling and gazing around in wonder. Reid met her, greeted her by sharing a quick embrace. I saw it from the corner of my eyes. Something inside me blazed seeing her hands behind his back, seeing her so close to him. Why was I getting mad at that contact? I don't own him I reminded myself.

They started talking, she laughed and he smiled in response. She grabbed his wrist and rushed to his desk.

"Is this your desk where you solve all mysteries, wow!" She cheered on.

It wasn't very busy at this hour so they wander around to picture memory wall to different offices like he was giving her a tour. Who was she? Soon, they were out of my sight but I remain frozen in my seat.

"Am I imagining or did he just past by with his girlfriend?" Garcia stood beside me with her go bag. She was leaving home that the odd pair struck her.

"Imagining" I replied.

"He can be so sneaky, no way!" Garcia mouth remained open.

Morgan returned back to head home but instead found two statues wondering.

"Girls, everything okay with yah?" He asked by waving his hand in front of our faces.

"Reid has a girlfriend!" Garcia spoke still frozen. Morgan frowned, almost audibly.

"WHAT?" he finally let out. Garcia without saying much grabbed his arm and dragged him out to follow where Reid and the mystery girl were strolling.

I know Reid too dam well to not believe Garcia's conclusions. He would never fall for someone that fast and that too within few days. There was something up. I too followed them in the main lobby. I hid behind the backs of my two fellow agents as we all sneakily profiled their conversation.

"These all belong to federal agents before us" Reid pointed to the wall of fame and she glared at it so keenly.

"WOW, I can't actually believe I am finally here!" She hailed. She then looked our way and we all pushed back concealing ourselves. Morgan stepped on my feet and I drank up my scream. I pushed this muscular guy aside hard and he fell right on the lobby floor pulling me along too. Oh shot!

Garcia hushed at us and ran away leaving us all exposed on the floor on top of each other. Reid and the girl turned to see two federal agents sweeping on the floor.

"O, are you okay?" The girl ran to us, I pushed myself off Morgan keeping my eyes on the girl. She was far slimmer than me, with black dark circles under her eyes. She looked average. She then smirked which I perceived to be very evil. Her competitive vibes were so damn clear to me. She gave her hand to me for a handshake, but I took it as a challenge. I wasn't backing out; I took her hand and smiled back.

"Hi, I am Marleen and you?" She greeted. I just kept giving her the Hotch-stare folding my arms in front of me. Reid was by now standing beside her.

"Marleen, they're my fellow team members" He introduced us so ruthlessly. Morgan greeted her next.

"Actually we are his friends" He corrected Reid. Marleen beamed.

"GREAT to meet you all! I hope you didn't get hurt." She responded.

"Ahhh….no" Morgan embarrassedly answered.

"Let me show you around the round table where we actually discuss our new cases, it's this way" Reid interrupted and looked straight back at me. I didn't expect his stare to be this angry. He then grabbed Marleen's hand. I gulped down the bile building up in my throat. His gestured with her, walking past me, his stare even angrier. Did he just end it all today? He was so mad at me for not responding to him. I stood still watching the two walking with each other, the side where I should be walking, the smile I should be causing. I knew him for far more time than this possible Marleen could even imagine.

"You look angry, I totally expected her" Morgan answered scanning my worried face.

"Feeling jealous?" He said.

"You gave him away yourself!"

"Regretting now huh?" he kept bombarding me with comments.

"I told you!"

"MORGAN! STOP IT!" I yelled a little. "ENOUGH!"

"Oh….my, so much anger in your voice. I wonder why?" He smirked and pushed him around to walk away. I didn't know why I was so furious all of a sudden. Morgan followed me.

"So that chapter closes then for you" he kept talking. I turned away.

"Are you seriously going to continue making your fool?" I asked.

"OOO, man, I love this! What a move by genius to get his lady all rocking up" Morgan swung around me.

"Love is fire they say" he kept swirling around me bothering the hell out of me.

"Stop misunderstanding, I thought you were a profiler" I questioned.

"Oh girl, you burning in there right" he laughed out loud fuelling me. It wasn't Marleen who was driving me crazy but our very own Derek Morgan!

"GODDD!" I turned back to walked back. He kept his annoying moves on.

"Let's go show her who's the boss here, shall we?" he threw his arm around my shoulder while walking back to our desks. Marleen was leaving, saying her goodbyes to Garcia and Reid.

"This is it ladies and gentlemen, now or never" Morgan whispered lightly beside me. I threw his arm away.

The feminine in me roared. I started to walk over to my man, claiming what was mine, stumping my shoes loudly, stealing all attention, moving like I was a ramp model, I saw Garcia gasping. I went as close to Reid as possible, intruding whatever distance was between us. I placed my hand on his side pulling him beside me. Shock as he was, the touch so familiar, sitting in the cold freezer room exchanging body heat. I dared not to exchange a glance with him at that moment. I might make it out alive.

"Hope my man showed you around everything you wanted to see" I said. Garcia gasped loudly. Marleen stunned a little. Girl had no idea who was the queen around here. But, her expressions quickly shifted to sudden happiness. Unexpectedly, she smiled so joyfully that I panicked. Her eyes showed no sign of defeat but of victory. What was happening, who was she to him?

"I had the best possible time. Thank you all but I have to catch my plane to Vegas now" Marleen said and I released the force from my hand holding onto the man I just claimed mine. Reid quickly created distance between us and followed Marleen out, stumping around the corner, on the edge of the desk. My inside smiled seeing how just one touch by me could make him lose all focus and fall.

Garcia, poor soul so unaware of all this almost forgot to inhale. It was just too much for her! Morgan laughed uncontrollable for few minutes before regaining back. I didn't believe I actually confessed my love and all credit goes to Morgan! Ahh!

"Emm—eemiill-yy?" Garcia slowly called me.

"I will take care of her" Morgan told me and on he went to his baby girl unfolding the tale.

I knew it was now or never. I hoped my point got across to Reid. Time to find out.

_****Do Share if you like or dislike the story? I am not the best writer out there but I try to get those emotions bang on. My writing is all about emotions, hope they get through you all. (3 more chapters left **____**)**_


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22:** **Bennington Sanitarium**

***Thanks a lot to all the followers and those who favourited this. Special thanks to Sue1313!**

**Morgan POV…**

On the weekend night, I lied down on my bed thinking over and over again of what just happened between us three for past many days. I literally was aching to get back now.

It wasn't a night like before, it was different. Reid was in trouble, going through mental torture every minute of his life. I felt sad thinking he excluded me from his misery when he promised he will share all good and bad things of life with me. Was I not worth of helping him anymore?

I couldn't wait for Monday to arrive already. I had to talk with him about so many things. I shifted my body to another side of the bed and now viewing out from my window, the dark starry sky.

A smile surfaced thinking of how proud Emily made me today, how she walked over, how she confessed so boldly. I could feel I finished my task today; my two friends were set for each other now!

But who knew the day tomorrow was unlike any, another sunrise with potential to change my life forever, the day which still holds so much value in my insane life now.

It was so unexpected, all of sudden! It all started when Hotch's call brings me out of my deepest sleep at around 2am in the morning. The hour, the voice clear signalled emergency.

"Morgan, its emergency, get to the bureau as fast as you!" The tension in his voice was clear. I threw my blanket away and got ready with the speed of light.

In matters of minutes, I was standing in front of my boss watching the horror on the TV screen in front of our eyes. News flashing, a new deadly case was ready!

_**The top Vegas Psychiatric institution Bennington Sanitarium is currently under the terror group. The local police are confirming two injuries so far and the entire center is currently kept hostage. **_

The bomb that dropped on my heard listening to the news reporter took away all the earth beneath me. It was weekend, and probably Reid went back to meet his mother. It was all my fault, he had no one to spend time with anymore so he went away!

"NO!" I smashed my fist on the table. Hotch reacted quickly reading my response.

"Garcia, have you got anything so far!" Hotch ordered.

"Sir, Reid's not picking up. I assume he's in Vegas too" she sadly answered.

"I am gonna see if he's at his place" I rushed around to leave.

"Take JJ with you!" Hotch ordered and both of us ran to the car outside in the parking.

I drove crazily, almost too insanely. This wasn't time to follow traffic laws; I crossed every traffic light, and the roads empty with the effects of night.

If Reid was taken hostage, and the captivator knew he's a fed, we might lose him forever. I accelerated rapidly. I halted the car too quickly and ran to the apartment that was holding all answers. JJ followed.

I skipped elevator and raced through the stairs. I tripped over a little while skipping few of the steps, my blood pressure reaching new heights.

"Careful!" JJ called out from behind.

I ran in the lobby until his door was now in sight. I banged the door like my whole life depends on this. My heart pounding too fast to function normally, I continued banging waiting desperately for someone to respond. Those few minutes of terror drove me so close to a heart attack, I panicked unlike anything ever.

"Morgan, stop, it's okay" JJ pulled my arms but I couldn't stop myself from calling upon Reid.

"REID! OPEN UP! PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE IN THERE!" I yelled on top of lungs while almost breaking the door. The neighbours opened their doors discovering a panicking agent. I decided to break the door and took a step back.

But, the door opened, and their stood my life, so sleepy almost falling to a side. Reid quickly regained complete awareness of the situation. Before anything else could happen, I ran inside hugging the body right in front of me thanking all Gods of all religions.

I squeezed the life out of him; I was shivering with fear holding him so tight I knew his lungs were suffering to expand. I wanted to feel he was here, with me, and not in Vegas to meet his mother. JJ calmed down all the wondering neighbours.

I then shoved Reid away from me unto the sofa behind us. JJ entered the place and closed the door behind. Terror replaced with anger.

"Morgan?" Reid panicked getting back up from the sofa. I furiously grabbed his arm and pulled him against me.

"Why weren't you PIKCING THE DAMN PHONE UP?" I yelled at his face. He retracted.

"YOU WANT US TO PANIC AND DIE! WHY? WHY?" WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG TO OPEN THE HELL UP?" I lost my control.

"Morgan, calm down" JJ placed her hand on my shoulder.

"Why do you do this to us Reid?" I asked before letting go of this arm and pushing me aside. I had no idea how hard I threw him but he landed on the floor with his head bumping right on the coffee table.

"Spence" JJ reacted and helped him lift up. His forehead was started to bleed a little.

"I am sorry Morgan" He said "my phone was off". He was almost crying seeing how angry I was.

"Spence, there is something important we wanted to tell you" JJ started off "Bennington Sanitarium is held hostage by a local terror group, we wanted you in this case as fast as possible". Reid panicked, creasing his injured forehead.

"Let's go" JJ lifted him back up to his feet. She rushed inside his room to gather the needed stuff. He stood there watching me then touched the blood spot from his forehead still asking me with his eyes, why. I died in guilty. I hated myself.

"Sorry Morgan" he said still touching the wound. Tears built up in my eyes and I rushed to grab his face with my hands. I softly moved and kissed his wound on the forehead and he closed his eyes at the contact. I shifted back to see his face. He opened his teary eyes and bit his lower lip.

"I can never be sorry enough" I told him.

"I would never forgive myself if anything happened to my mom" He said and panicked.

"We're not going to let that happen" I replied "We will do it together, like always, bring safety to our loved ones".

"Morgan, I can't, I'm so weak now!" He sadly confessed.

"We all are with you" I consoled him but his eyes looked so tired, I started to fear.

"Morgan, are you real?" His innocent words left my dumfounded; I melted in my own sanity hearing the most feared words out of my dearest friend's mouth. I had nothing left to add to his misery.

"I am as real as it gets, boy!" I hugged him again just to let him know I really was there, like always.

"Will you leave me again?" He asked sadly. I cried over his shoulder and the embrace became more heartily.

"NEVER, never again, I promise unto my life" I broke the hug just to drink up all the tears from his eyes. I wiped them away.

"Promise?" He asked so nicely, I almost fainted and nodded my head sharply.

"Remember what Nathan Harris told me, promise is not a promise unless you say it out loud" Reid smiled after ages at me.

"Yes, I promise to my pretty boy" I ruffled his hairs and both shared a quick smile. I then paid attention to the background, JJ leaning in the doorway, arms folded, glaring and grinning at us.

"Shall we go now?" She asked and zoom we were travelling back to bureau. On the way, Emily texted me, She was even more worried than me but after I replied she probably felt in heaven again. Once in a while, while driving, I sneaked a look at Reid and with time he was becoming more and more apprehensive.

This case was crucial, probably most important one for Reid. Without wasting any time, we were onto it. A brief discussion with the rest of the team and after a long time we actually "wheeled up" together as a team.

The plane was leaving in few minutes. The whole team was settling down for the ride. Rossi had the news running on his tablet. I was waiting for this moment. Emily entered the plane, I quickly looked over Reid, and he saw her coming, smiled and she in returned seemed overjoyed. I must salute his will, smiling at his love even in the tensest moment. The rest of the ride went with decoding of the case.

"So what do we know about his terror group?" Hotch asked the group.

"According to local PD, the group is not very well known; they had little to no activity prior to this" JJ started off.

"Local police received a call around an hour ago, made by the local staff nurse on the behalf of the captivators. They have no demands. They just called in to let us know that no one will be saved in the institution and defeat is inevitable." Garcia continued.

"So it's like they are openly challenging the police?" Rossi threw another thought.

"Speculations are that the terror group is composed of 5-7 young males in their twenties" JJ mentioned.

"The way they are threatening clearly talks their mental instability, they are frustrated beyond control, otherwise why not make demands out of this situation" I said.

"It's strange, no political agenda, no demands, no negotiations, what is their prime goal?" Hotch said.

"Terror, helplessness, at the end of all this blame goes to the defence department" Reid spoke to the group "they probably are unemployed, drop outs from school, poor present, no hope for future, all triggers to this extreme mental state".

"But, why challenge the police?" Emily asked others.

"We need to check in with their past histories for that" Hotch answered.

"Why this place? Why not somewhere else?" Reid sadly asked almost to himself. The whole group empathized with him, putting ourselves in his shoes felt so difficult.

"They are themselves mentally ill; could that signify this choice of target?" JJ hypothesized.

"Killing off them would mean ending their mental torture, saviour kind of act" Rossi added. This case couldn't get any strange, the victimology to unsubs, nothing fitted together.

At last, Vegas was here. We were quickly rushed to the control center set up near the Sanitarium. Garcia went right on with setting up. The local head Agent Amanda greeted us.

"Glad to see you all, this one is messed up. We have tried calling in many times, they're no answers, the whole place is in deep silence currently, all lights off, no one knows what's going on?" Agent reported.

"When was the last activity recorded?" I asked.

"Two hours ago, few gun shots. That was after 10 minute of the call made." She answered.

"I need the recording of the call, Garcia you're on it" Hotch ordered.

"So what's plan? There are about 150 people inside right now" Agent went on. Hotch exhaled loudly. Reid panicked biting his bottom lip so hard, I knew it will bleed shortly.

"The faster we know who's involved, the faster we can get to them" Rossi answered.

"They're not up for negotiation; they want us to watch helplessly" Amanda added.

"We're not gonna do what they want!" Reid spoke harshly, his tone full of frustration.

"Our profile can lead us to them" Hotch assured Agent Amanda.

"We don't have time for that!" She literally yelled back.

"They don't care what we do, one by one we going to lose everyone in their" Amanda went on.

"It's their mind that's driving them crazy, only an accurate profile and a negotiation technique in accordance can help, your weapons just going to make this a war ground" Reid said.

An officer rushed in the room.

"12 shots have been fired inside the sanitarium just a moment ago!" he informed. A new chaos took birth in the station. Garcia gasped and Reid's face almost cried, holding back all the pains.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23: Finale PART I**

_**I want to deeply apologize to all reader for any typo or other editing errors. Sorry . Enjoy the 2**__**nd**__** last chapter. **_

**Reid POV…**

I walked over and sat down on the seat in misery no one could imagine. 12 more shots from inside the place I considered my home, a place where my mom lived and hell was showering the fire on me.

Mental stress, one after another, what have I done so wrong in life to deserve all this? I was baffled at my fate. I used to believe life was fair with fair people, but never has those few moments of happiness dared to stay longer than few instants in my life. I really gave up on trust, like literally erasing the meaning of this word from my internal memory stores. My life too was not trustworthy any longer.

I told myself, this is the last time. I have to save my mother and disappear away from the entire world, to a place of peace! Tears were burning my eyes but I controlled them for sake of my sanity.

Emily entered the conference room and chose to sit beside me. She grabbed my hand in her hand, shocking me.

"Reid?"

I loved her voice. From nowhere, I could feel alive again.

"Hmm?" I let out.

"Can I ask something from you? A kind request?" She lightly pressed my hand in her palm making me feel so nervous.

"I don't have anything" I answer something I regretted the moment later.

She remained quiet just staring at the floor. I retracted my hand back but she resisted.

"Look Reid, all I am asking you is to have faith in yourself, in your team and…in your love" She said. I l had to look over now. Her words baffled me. She smiled back the moment we connected our sight.

"Give me a chance to prove I can do it for you…for us" She spoke lightly.

"Life doesn't give anyone second chances. I have only one chance to get my mother back now!" I stood up realizing how precious every second was.

"Hotch is briefing the swat right now, hopefully it works now" Emily rose up too.

I walked out of the room to listen to the briefing as well.

"Without negotiation, this won't end well. Despite the fact that they are resisting to approach us but this doesn't stop us from approaching them. Agent Rossi and Agent Morgan will accompany the squad. Before we initiate any sort of plan, we need to get as many people out as possible." Hotch went on.

On the side, Morgan and Rossi were getting in their bulletproof vests. I ran over to them.

"Rossi, I want to go. I can talk to them. I know what's happening in their minds. I can talk out their thoughts" I explained.

"No way! You're not going in there at any cost" Morgan jumped in.

"I am not talking to you! Let me go in please Rossi! I promise I can help" I insisted. Rossi signed.

"Reid, you know it's dangerous, let us handle this one, trust me" Rossi pated on my shoulder.

"ROSSI! My mom is in there; I won't sit back here and wait. I'm not THAT useless" I almost yelled in desperation.

Hotch was quiet and everyone in the room watched my frantic self.

"Please Hotch!" I turned around almost begging for one last chance to change something in my life.

"Reid, your mother is in there, what guarantees that you will stay under control and not run over by emotions. We can't take risks by sending in you, especially in this state" He answered back.

"Hotch, I have to go and I will go and no one can stop me! Fire me afterwards if you want to" I threatened.

"You are intelligent enough to know your condition, don't put everyone in danger" Rossi added.

Another gun shot and chaos spread in the room. Hotch frowned before walking over to me.

"Let them do their job and not waste any further time!" He almost whispered. Morgan quietly stood behind me, watching me plead.

"Hotch, you don't have faith in my skills any longer?" I asked as the SWAT made their way out, my voice cracking.

"It's not that" He answered.

"Then, let me." I said and he easily read all the tears bathing in my eyes. He gulped down glaring at my face, probably seeing the failure exposing itself. I knew something in him moved him from inside.

"Morgan, Reid will go in your place" He mentioned and I rushed away to get ready leaving Morgan behind apposing and arguing.

I got prepared to play this with my life, once again. I grabbed my gun and placed in my spot. Morgan kept insisting but I blocked out all voices.

Rossi and I turned back once seeing our team looking satisfied, Hotch confident, JJ trying to put a fake smile, Morgan pleading with his eyes, Garcia almost crying and Emily just blankly staring at me. I promised myself that if return successfully, I would give all the chances she ask for.

Who knew the decision I made was not the best? I remember how we approach the building, Rossi calling over the loud speaker an offer to talk. The response was met with more firing inside. My stomach flipped knowing what massacre must be occurring inside.

SWAT moved few steps forward, each settling their targets again from different angles now. Rossi's confidence broke into piece but he still tried once again.

"We can talk and no one gets hurt" He called out again. Nothing happened. We walked near the front entrance, walking in most alert forms cutting through the air first with our weapons than our bodies.

One officer stepped forward to open the doors and ensure safety before the rest entered. The main lobby was destructed, bullet shots all around the walls, no blood in sight, and so all this was to scare us. The lights were off and the windows presented the slow approaching sunrise, orange and yellow sky glaring at me.

"No one's at the main lobby, all clear" I reported back to the team waiting back there using the connection we established.

We continued the attack and made our way to the basement. Front line officers signalled presence of people there.

"There are in there with some hostages" One whispered back to the rest.

"Let us handle this" Rossi slowly started to walk and I followed him. Guns were defending us as we entered their line of sight. The gunman was waiting for us holding a nurse on gunpoint. Two more were behind the leader and many patients and staff sitting on the floor, all staring at us, thinking we are their saviour. The fear of death was clearly radiating from their eyes. It was these moments in my work that distorting who I was. Humanity against humanity.

"Put your weapons down before you even talk! I'll shoot if you don't" The leader harshly ordered yelling and scaring the hostages.

I knew SWAT was ready as the back-up so I initiated first, slowly bending down to put my defence down. The microchip camera hanging from my shirt collar was streaming this back to the center where rest of the team were identifying the men as fast as possible and to get us as much information as possible about them.

"Spencer! Don't listen to them" I heard my mom's voice. I looked around the room and she was amongst the people sitting on the floor. I gulped down all tension registering her condition, calling me by my name would risk everything like how Hotch anticipated. I was happy to know she was still alive at least.

The gunman shifted back to see which lady spoke to me and eyed me to understand the connection.

"They are all mental patients, they hallucinate" Rossi quickly added to lower the suspicion. The gunmen out of nowhere fired a bullet in the air scaring every life inside the captivated area.

"I told you not to talk before putting your weapon down!" He yelled at Rossi and my fellow agent quickly followed the order.

"Here is the thing, either we kill all these people and spare you and your force …or…you can save them all but die yourself…choose wisely country saviours" Leader spoke to us.

"You don't need to kill others to let the world know how you feel" I started off "we already know your feelings, I know you are hurt, frustrating with this world, their ways so selfish. All this can have an alternative ending if you choose to do so"

"You tell us why you are doing this and we might let you out alive?" Rossi offered. The gunman continued to stare at me ignoring Rossi.

_What's left to be humiliated about now boy? Kill him and end this. _

The whispers returned in my mind forcing me to lose all my focus, all my strategy suddenly falling apart.

"HA! Why would I tell you the 'why'?" Leader went on laughing a little at us.

"Then how would the world know what you're trying to say through this?" Rossi questioned back.

"You think you're the God, can save anyone, can punish anyone!" Leader started to open up. Rossi shook his head slowly.

"Hi mad people, you think they can save you today?" Leader shifted around facing the hostages now.

"Yes, they can" one woman answered back.

Now what happened next, no one could predict. The bullet went right through ripping the life out of that woman. I flinched.

"Sorry! They just failed" gunman lightly laughed. Rossi and I tensed even more. The leader was in severe psychotic break and extremely unpredictable. I prayed so hard that my mom doesn't speak anything.

"So who's next?" Leader went on with his crazy show.

"You want help, we are here" Rossi added on.

"Why'd you kill the innocent woman?" My mom suddenly asked and my heart started to accelerate.

"I guess you are next" the leader smiled at her and my inside went on fire.

"Stay calm Reid" Hotch spoke over my earpiece.

"Life's not in your hand. I am not even scared" she replied "Spencer, tell them to go away, I need to sleep now" She started to get up. I wished I could tell her to stop provoking.

"Stay seated or else…"gunman ordered her.

"Noo…no, you don't want to do this" Rossi nervously started to move little closer to him. My mom stood up staring at me.

"I am leaving now and Spencer I can't let you stay here in danger so you are coming along with me" She said.

"Stay where you are!" I ordered her but nothing in the world could stop her.

"PLEASE! SIT DOWN!" I ordered her again but she started to stroll and the leader pointed his gun at her.

"Let's go out son-" and the bullet silenced her.

For few moments, my world stopped, in silence there was nothing but the sound of the gunshot, I closed my eyes feeling like the bullet was penetrated my mind tearing through my flesh.

With a loud thud, she fell to the ground and in the saddest moments of my life I ran over forgetting all rules, all plans, all safety, to run again to my mother, my life, my own blood. I heard my team yelling all in my ear but nothing in life mattered any more. I didn't know when the order was given but the SWAT entered the scene to target kill the gunmen, bullets sprayed around in the room and the battle was on.

I kneeled beside her body trying to apply as much pressure as possible to stop the bleeding in her stomach. I had to bow down dodging some of the bullets. All senses and neurons firing action potentials to keep me focus on getting her out to medical help.

"Mom, stay with me!"

_***Get ready for the finale; it's going to take you to the ends of your seats! **_


	24. Chapter 24

**FINALE PART II**

**Reid POV…**

In the middle of the rampage, I quickly lifted her body and slowly sneaked out of the basement to get help as fast as possible. Rossi was taking cover at a side, fully involved in shooting. More gunmen from other rooms entered the scene too.

I slid across the room to get my gun back and then carried my mom in my arms and ran to the stairs. My mom literally clutched me tight, holding on for her dear life.

Few steps up and away from the hell and a gunman spotted me. He chased me along with his weapons. I panicked and adrenaline forced my muscles to work harder, walk faster, run harder. The man hurried me up to the stair.

"STOP BEFORE I SHOOT!" He yelled and I dodged around the top of the stairs to get away from the bullet he just fired after me. Her weight was resisting my run.

The man came into my sight again and I continued my run from one corner to get to lobby entrance as fast as possible.

"Spencer," My mom ached in pain and my shirt dampened with her blood. I was crying from inside but outside I was sweating in nervousness.

Another bullet missed my body from inches and I retracted toward an open room. I rushed around and hid behind a counter and placed my mom on the floor. I signalled her to be quiet. She was making painful faces.

I heard footsteps coming into the room. My heart beat synchronizing with it. I panicked and slowly took my gun out and peered through the top surface of the counter. The man was aiming at my direction, furiously looking here and there.

"Come out you coward! I thought you were some sort of saviour but you turned out to be a piece of shit!" He screamed.

I was afraid beyond any words. My hands starting to shake as I tried to set my target on him from behind my hiding spot.

_You think you can shoot your way out. Remember you are aimless crap. _

The whispers and my tears tried their full on to distract my attention. I tried to focus. My mom grabbed my ankle from behind. I looked back. Her eyes were closed shut and she was in loads of pain, shaking her head at me. I bent back down and kissed her forehead.

"Mom, hold on" I whispered so lightly in her ear. She grabbed my face with her bloody hands and continued to shake her head. The strength in her grip tightened.

"Mom, let me go and finish this" I whispered almost silently trying to break free from her.

I heard more footsteps coming into the room. My heart sank. I might die today with my mom on my side.

"I know you are hiding there" Gunman spoke again, another drop of sweat and terror slide across my forehead. I started to pull one finger at a time from my face.

"Please?" I whispered to her but she wasn't letting go of her son now.

"Come out or I will rip you into pieces before you even know!" He yelled throwing a chair at my direction which broke right beside my mom. I flinched with fear. Gripping the gun with all my dear life, I pushed her hands off me and got back to my stance. I got surprised how close the gunman had approached already. But even more frightening was the person now standing at the doorway, bruised and injured. Marleen stood there still, without any protection. Every cell in my body rose up to defend humanity.

My finger went close to the trigger still hiding the weapon behind the counter, now all I had to do was surprise fire at him.

"I can hear you breathing" gunman's voice got dangerously close.

_Final chance, you'll lose your mom, you'll fail._

For the first time in life, these whispers actually helped me stay motivated and working my work to destroying the fear ahead of me. They challenged me. The only way to stop them was to prove them wrong. And this moment was the chance to get myself out. This all was nothing but a mindless escape I never planned.

"I know you are behind that damn counter, come out" His words alarmed me to another extent. His shoes were now closer than I could imagine. If I came out and fired, I might hail down in the bullets too. If I don't, the next step he takes and I'll be under his sight.

My genius brain went on a rampage, figuring, calculating, and analyzing the most important decision of my life. Finally, I decided.

I stood up before he took the next step, rising from behind the counter with the gun steadily pointing at another human, now a psychopath killer.

"Marleen, leave!" I yelled focusing my gaze at the enemy. He looked my way, feeling little threatened with my stance. I heard only silence from my earpiece. My team too was dying in the moment of decision. Marleen paled seeing me come out. I wanted the gunman to for a few seconds take his gaze away from me to her and I would shot all the bullets I got.

"MARLEEN, OUT NOW!" I yelled again listening to the bizarre firing still undergoing in the basement.

"I can help your mom" She answered back and I saw the gunman tempting to turn back.

"Let my mom go and we can sort this out after" I requested the man but he grinned instead.

"I love killing saviours!" he said.

"This is between me and you, let her take my mom away" I offered.

"NO!" he yelled now walking over to me with his barrel staring right into my eyes. The hollow darkness inside the gun scared me, this was too real to defy. Unconsciously I backed off a little.

"First, I will kill you, then; I will kill this lady…" He continued his stroll near me.

"Stop right there, or I will fire" I threatened keeping my distance from him. His bullets were looking at me, like God really never existed, like these inanimate objects held the true power. My morals and believes refused to agree. How could I become afraid of this?

_True peace, true power, true creator, He is the saviour and no man can take his position._

The whispers suddenly sounded like my voice almost turning from into my thoughts, like transitioning back to my mind away from auditory senses. Was I losing them forever now?

I shifted back another step until the heel of my shoe contact my mother's body. She held tightly my ankle again.

_One move and you can escape._

The whispers started to fade away, the adrenaline, epinephrine, cortisol all pumped in my blood stream driving my soul forward. I couldn't back off any further, the man moved forward. So much hatred was evidence in his look, the betrayal from mankind powering his walk.

He could now see my dying mother on the floor holding onto me. Why was I fighting for life? What have it given me so far!

_Your team, Morgan, JJ, Garcia, Rossi, Hotch and your one and only love Emily awaits you. _

I listened carefully to my thoughts and lowered my gun away, giving him the chance to shot me down. He baffled seeing me give up.

"Kill me" I said and he frowned.

"End this" I ordered again with increasing confidence.

"REID NO!" I heard Morgan begging in my ear.

"Kill this saviour so the real saviour can come down!" I said and the man tangled in my words, shocked with my poise. He suddenly shifted the gun down in my mom's direction.

Before he could pull the trigger, Marleen read him off well and sprinted from the doorway and crashed into the terrorist pulling him down on the floor and then there was a gun shot, screams echoed inside me. Closing my eyes tightly, I pulled the triggered firing the man before I lost my target. That bastard shot once again and Marleen backed off spraying blood everywhere. I continued firing at the pyscho until he was no more, completely stiff and finally meeting with death.

Marleen landed down. I rushed over to her. The bullet was in her head, killing her inside. I kneeled beside her, now crying.

"Why did you do this? I had the target myself!" I asked rubbing her hands. I continued to cry.

"I was….I…dying…anyways….I help" She babbled as life slowing started to leave her.

"NO!" I begged no one.

"You…are…the best, I'll be…you friend forever, right?" She struggled to speak.

"My BFF?" She raised her bloody hand to touch my right cheek.

"Yes, forever, please stay, hold on" I pleaded.

"SEND THE PARAMEDICS ON THE ENTRANCE! NOW!" I yelled over to my team.

"You can always find me in any friends of yours, you…have… I will …stay, always stay…happy with Emily, she loves you a lot…take care…of-" She gasped for air, her hand fell back, her eyes stilled, a smile froze on her face. I checked her pulse but it was too late. She had left the world already. I wanted to yelp more but managed to get back to my feet and carried my mom. I ran out of the room, from the lobby, to the main entrance where paramedics were awaiting. My mom had lost too much blood. The doctors took over her and I dropped down to my knees. Few officers dragged me away from the building to safety. My task was done; my mom was out from hell.

I reunited with my team and Morgan ran over to me first, hugging like this was the last time. I too felt peace in his arms.

"You did it!" He whispered but he was almost crying.

The hug lasted for few minutes before we pulled off. I was drench in human blood. Nausea was upheaving. Morgan supported me as I rushed to the washroom and emptied all my stomach content. He kept holding me while I bent over. He then turned the tap on and I washed the blood off my face, the blood of my mom and Marleen now mixing in the sink with water. The smell of blood induce never ending headache. I fell back in Morgan's grip but he pulled me in for another hug.

"It's going to all okay now, just try to calm down" He said and I sank down on the floor of the washroom pulling Morgan along. Hotch entered and sat beside us. I hid myself in Morgan's embrace. Hotch gripped my arm.

"I am so proud of you today Reid!" Hotch spoke and I continued to get lost in Morgan's love, like how an older brother, how a best friend, how a father holds his life in his arms, never letting go again.

**Emily POV…**

It was 9 am and the whole building was evacuated leaving all gunmen dead. Rossi had injured his arm and was rushed to the hospital with few other injured officers.

Garcia brought in coffee for me and JJ both sitting in the conference room. JJ was drained out of the night. Garcia too looked dishevelled with all the work she did tonight. After Reid rescued his mom, the leader gunman was identified and targeted all thanks for this baby girl's efforts. Hotch was still lost in all the procedure.

We three were trying to regain ourselves from the longest night ever. Morgan and Reid were still away. Not once did he let go his pretty boy since the time he came back. I wouldn't either if I had the chance.

Wasn't all my life I was waiting for a man so different and unlike anything I have ever seen? Wasn't I desperately waiting for a man so true to everything, so passionate, so kind? Was I blind to not see what I always wanted was always with me? I smiled at my silliness.

"What's causing this teeny tiny smile on our girl's face?" Garcia asked.

"I thought Morgan told you" I replied and Garcia smiled.

"I can't wait!" She cheered lightly and JJ who was leaning back on her chair lifted her resting head frowning.

"Am I missing something?" She inquired.

"You haveee nooo idea" Garcia elongated each word. I smiled again thinking about the person this conversation was after.

"HEYY! No fair, tell me" JJ whined at us.

"Come on now don't make a fuss about this here, you know the consequences" I warned Garcia.

JJ's phone rang. It was from the hospital informing about Reid's mother's condition. She was out of the surgery now and onto recovering her way back to wellness. Another wave of peace washed over us. Rossi too was discharged.

I looked outside the window as JJ went on with Garcia trying to learn the mystery behind my smile. This day was brighter than usual, sun shining amazingly. Darkest night usually brought in the brightest stars but what about the brightest days.

I closed my eyes, feeling like I had conquered this day and it would soon become the greatest day of my life. I rose to my feet and left the room and my quarrelling ladies.

My eyes searching for only one face, longing to see it, feel the high it brought. And there he was leaning on the wall sipping in the coffee outside the monitor room. Surprisingly Morgan was not there. I walked over and stood right in front of him, trapping him between me and the wall. His eyes widened as I went even closer, smiling how devilish I was.

"So…?" I asked while smiling and looking at the tall man right in front of me. He smiled too.

"So?" He repeated.

"Do you believe in words?" I asked.

"No…not a lot" He answered stretching his lips into even a bigger smile. I grabbed his collars and pulled him closer to me, only inches apart now.

"So…I must tell it with actions then?" I whispered near his lips. I knew he was hesitating. This was my weakness, the way he nervously lost all focus when I was in control.

"Hmm?" I asked again.

"I don't know" He answered shyly.

"Well tell me fast before….I assume the answer myself" I went closer now touching his nose with mine.

"I-I" he tried to speak but I heard footsteps. I retracted back letting go of his collar and breaking the contact with him.

"Not the right place" He answered grabbing the coffee cup with such force, I thought it will bend.

"I won't wait long…any further" I said seeing the magic I created on his face glowing more powerfully than any pearl. I walked away as other people entered in doing their own chores of life.

….

**Emily POV…**

The car raced on the road as lavishly green trees passed along our side. The sky too was light blue covered with rain clouds. It was drizzling, softly. The raindrops were slowly falling on the windows enlightening the whole scene. That was perfect day, away from city, out in woods to have the most relaxing weekend ever.

I saw sitting in the back seat with Garcia on my side and Rossi in the front. Morgan drove and Reid was on the passenger side. It had been two weeks since the Bennington case ended. Reid's mom fully recovered.

This weekend, our team decided to have a family trip together to Rossi's woodland. It was early morning of a rainy day when two cars got ready to hit the road. Will drove the other car with Hotch, Jack, Henry, JJ and Beth. This was supposed to be the real team reunion.

The journey was long, almost four hour drive. Morgan and Will were constantly racing each other and I was glad I choose this car, why wouldn't I, Reid was like electromagnetic force for me!

Last night, when JJ came over to my house to pack for the trip, I told her everything, from start to till today. Sitting back at the seat, I remembered how it went.

"_No way, Morgan told you that!" JJ exclaimed loudly throwing away her swimsuit._

"_I didn't think it was serious at first" I explained._

"_I never noticed Reid doing something fishy" JJ went on._

"_Obviously, he never wanted anyone to know his feelings and that included me too. For him, I was just a dream!" I said back._

"_So how and when did you know it was 'serious'?" JJ sat down on the bed smiling wildly. _

"_The William case, the way he kept posing us as a couple, the way he protected me, got beat up for me, he even slipped out calling me 'his love' and he saved me when I was freezing, the way he looked to the way he talked everything just spoke of love. I saw the truth in him. I knew it was serious when his warm touch melted my frozen body risking his own life, the way he fought with William saving me again and again. The way he smiled at me…I know it was real" I went on reliving each loved moment again taking JJ along on my journey "and it was clear from that moment when I couldn't forget him even for a second, remembering old times with him…aching for more, I was surprised myself knowing I too was falling for him, but so much more deeply than I could ever anticipate"._

"_All this __happened and you didn't considered even telling __me?" JJ complained._

"_I didn't know if it was real. I didn't know what to do…but I couldn't just hang on…I had to tell him" I answered._

"_So you told him your feelings?" JJ asked lost in true happiness. _

"_No, I have kept the words for a very special moment but he knows now" I told her._

I smiled remembering how beautiful it feels to finally reach your destiny, the struggles and all the pains it took for us to be here today worth it all.

Garcia was arguing with Morgan on which song to play next.

"No, not this one" She whined.

"Oh come on baby girl, this is like the hundredth song you're not liking" He complained while driving. The trip would be enjoyable but the drive was always more fun, only bad part was that Reid was so far away, sitting at front. I calmed myself down; I can't be that selfish always now.

"Put 'how bout us' then" Rossi told Morgan. And, suddenly the white van zoomed beside and over took us.

"Shoot! Will's thinking he's winning" Morgan accelerated.

"Drive faster, faster, faster" Garcia cheered loudly. I joined in with a laugh. And a text beeped on my phone. I checked.

'**Some laughs are just unforgettable'**

Reid was texting from front of the car; I couldn't hold back my smirk. He was noticing me even when we were not in sight. So I replied back:

'**And there're some people who you can't get enough of'**

I leaned back in the seat and closed my eyes reading the text over and over again, stomach fluttering as I drown in love.

At last, the car stopped and we unloaded. I must say, the place was beyond beautiful, a little hut like place with windows opening in front of the water fall. Will beat our van with few minutes of lead and kept bugging Morgan who laughed it off.

"Who said we were racing?" Morgan mocked. Hotch and Beth got out of the car, smiling beautifully. I loved them together before but now I was more interested in another couple.

"Let's settle in this heaven for a while" Rossi exclaimed as the boys and JJ quickly unloaded all the bags.

"Who's up for a tea now?" Garcia asked as we entered the place.

"The drivers are sure needy" Will spoke in his accent. JJ rushed up to the stairs to place the bags in the rooms. It was a five room hut style house. I had to share my room with Garcia. I quickly got fresh, washing my face and combing my hair back into a pony tail. The comb fell from my hand as my fingers lost the balance on it; they were still very weak at the tips. Forgetting the past horror, I quickly walked down hearing laughter coming in from the living room. Reid was coming up on the stairs and I met him here.

"Hmmm, so where's this genius heading?" I asked blocking his way.

"Emily! Not here" He whined.

"What? Am I doing something?" I asked shyly. He smiled and walked a step up.

"I'm supposedly going to the washroom" he answered.

"So what's your plan?" I asked.

"You mean my plans in the washroom?" He asked and my laugh followed it.

"I was talking about this trip" I explained.

"I don't know relax, enjoy, chill, and have the best time possible" He went on.

"Like I told you before I won't wait long" I threatened but nicely. He understood and laughed a little.

"Impatient" He said.

"Some people have this power you know, patience is lost at times" I said back and JJ marched down the stairs.

"O! Hello people, nice place to do all the talking huh?" She asked and walked past me and him ruffling his hairs "don't bug my Spence"

I too followed her down but stopped when reached his side.

"You don't want me losing patience, trust me" I said and left him all crazy.

Soon, Rossi started to prepare lunch for everyone, his special Italian recipes, and the aromas were tickling my nose. I was hungry as a beast. Morgan and Will were downstairs planning the hiking trip for tomorrow.

The positive energy was in the air, like true reunion of love and family, like forgetting all bad and sad parts, for once I felt so alive, like every tear was worth these warm moments.

On the sofa beside the window, Hotch and Beth were sitting, sharing beautiful laughter. Their voices were sounding like twinkling bells. This was what I called peace. After a big emotional storm, the sunlight was breathtaking.

We had lunch where we all sat together enjoying what Rossi cooked for us, definitely he couldn't stop admiring his own work but Morgan and Hotch ate the most. Right across me sat, my Reid. Once in a while, we stared each other while others were busy with their appetite. He would occasionally smile and drink up a shy laugh. I wish my eyes took take pictures of that face.

After lunch, Morgan's football league game was on where guys and I made all the noise possible with our voice boxes. Sofas must be crying of how much Morgan jumped on it during the game. The positive energy continued to spread magically as the game ended with victory.

After this day, I learnt what actually happiness was! The emotions gusting inside like winds swaying away all worries. The laughter seemed to fill our ears again and again. But, happiness on Reid's face was priceless!

Nevertheless, Morgan too felt so real after so many days, like he was lost somewhere and return home finally. I must agree Morgan played the biggest role in my happiness. Nothing was impossible for him when it came to friends, someone so caring that it felt surreal. Morgan yet was another wonder of the world that I couldn't think of living without.

As night fell, we decided to walk around the forest and chill. Hotch and Beth volunteered to stay back with the kids who were fast asleep.

We trolled around, taking and then singing, daring each other along the way. Rossi was accompanying Garcia, Will and JJ holding each other's hands as they walked. And, then there was our trio with Morgan in the middle.

We set up few logs and created bonfire to sit around and for once forget all crimes and cases. Morgan hosted the bonfire night with his truth and dare game. Guess who was it first! Morgan! And he sat across Reid.

"Okay! Mr. Derek, truth or dare?" Reid asked.

"Oh man! Okay…let me think…hmm, here I go with…dare" He replied. The group cheered a little.

"My man got the courage, kind a sweet" Garcia spoke in her lustful voice.

"Dare…ok…climb this tree, and sit on…hmm…that branch there" Reid pointed to the tree above us. JJ laughed out loud.

"You think I'm a monkey or something!" Morgan asked Reid.

"You can give up if you want" Reid smirked.

"Never, just remember I'm gonna have my turn too!" Morgan said as he took his jacket off and off he went to trying to climb the rough tree. Garcia and JJ captured the moment with their phones.

"You look very skilled in this" Rossi mocked. In few minutes, Morgan was hanging off to a branch.

"Look at those muscles" Garcia admired.

"You have to sit on it" Reid instructed seeing Morgan having a hard time hanging on the branch.

"Careful there" I yelled.

Finally, after a few minutes of the show Morgan was sitting stiffly on the branch. Few more pictures were taken and he jumped off falling in the pile of leaves below. He was out of breath. He eyed Reid madly and he in turn acted all innocent. Salt and Pepper at its best.

"Let it spin and spin and spin" Garcia sang as the empty beer bottle span again. Ah, it landed on me!

"My turn, YES!" JJ cheered and actually stood up "so Emily, choose your fate, truth or dare?"

I could read her mischief thoughts oh so clearly. I was trapped either way so I give in with truth.

"Oh come on" Morgan the dare man whined a little.

"Interesting choice" JJ went on "so I guess it's time to confess something Emily…what'd you say?" I tensed hearing her. Will frowned a little feeling out of place.

"Confession?" Rossi asked while smirking.

"You'll know shortly" JJ answered. I didn't know why I was suddenly feeling so shy. I looked up at Reid and he was blushing with his eyes on his shoes. His pink, almost red lips were stretched into a cute little smile. His skin tone so perfect, I bet even moon was jealous of my possession, the hairs nicely framing his face, the light from fire highlighting his cheeks. The sight was enough to get my desires roaring inside. Confession was a far thought, I was ready to do so much more. I regretted not picking dare to see what JJ had in store for me.

"Come on, say it loud and clear" JJ demanded, all eyes fixing on me and even he looked up. We glared at each other momentarily absorbing each other's sight.

"Can't wait!" Morgan exclaimed taking his camera out. I stood up and cleared my throat; I couldn't hold the smile back. It was the most awkward moment of my entire life.

"So…I just want to say that…hmm…" I started and slowly walked over to his direction. All eyes examining us now. He kept staring at me. I stopped in front of him as he looked up, shy but confident at the same time.

"Spencer, I love you" I lightly said and the cheers up lifted around from our group with claps. His cheeks turned the biggest red color as he bent his head down probably biting his lips.

"Me too Emily" He answered.

"YEAHHH!" JJ screamed and hugged me and him tightly together while jumping around. I got my chance to hug him there too.

"You better sit here now" Rossi winked at me and I sat beside Reid.

"I never knew I was that dam good with my skills" Rossi said and the group giggled. So, the bottle stopped on Will who sat across Garcia. He picked dare and was told to carry JJ in his arms and run five laps around the woodhouse.

The night took another turn as the game continued until it was midnight. Everyone got up to get some sleep before heading for hiking tomorrow. I remained seated while other went away. I grasped Reid's wrist and pulled him back. We let everyone go and he sat back. I moved my hand from his wrist to his hand, tangling my fingers with his. I rested my head on his shoulder and he too tilted his head my way.

"Best night ever right?" I asked as looking at the smokes coming from the lit out bon sticks. He exhaled loudly.

"Yes but I hope I'm not dreaming" He almost whispered. I squeezed his hand a little.

"If it is a dream then we better not wake up ever" I replied. I closed my eyes feeling how close he was to me. I wanted time to freeze so I could forever cherish this moment.

"Thanks a lot for existing" I said and lifted my head up to see his beautiful face but found tears instead.

"What's this?" I wondered wiping his tears away.

"I'm not used to of being this happy, I mean…I don't deserve this" He lowered his eyes and defined his fears.

"I don't know about you but I deserve you more than anything" I replied lifting his head a little.

"Emily, I don't know if I'll be able to keep up with you, I'm so mentally drained out" He said.

"You're just tired, very exhausted of being on your own and lonely but let love do the wonders" I replied.

"All my life, I felt so useless, aimless, at times helpless, on mercy of others. I am tired of living this way, I guess I have to stop running away from what I love and what I love is with me now." He looked up at me and took my hand in his hand examining the cut ends of my fingers. He gulped looking at uneven finger tips. I knew how guilty he felt for my frostbite. He placed all my fingers on his palm and lifted them up to his lips, gently kissing the healing tips. I melted at the touch, at the sight, losing all my strength. I kissed him back on his cheeks. The chance I took was bombarding at me as my surrounding suddenly faded into heaven. I was out of this world. I didn't know when but I started to cry. He hugged me and I continued to cry in his arms finally finding what I came in this world for. The heavens witnessed this glory moment. I don't know about him but I couldn't imagine how this would end if Morgan hadn't told me. Morgan gave Reid's aimless life a new aim and my fearful being a new courage.

I didn't how long the hug lasted but it was certainly for hours. Either of us couldn't think of letting go. I prayed this night never ends so I could melt away in the touch, in the scent, in the feel of my love like nothing but love could soothe all pains.

"_**Everyone says love hurts, but that is not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy Hurts. Everyone get these things confused with love. But in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again" Anonymous. **_

…..

***So this ends this story, hope you all enjoyed the journey. Through this story I wanted readers to understand the power of love and its healing abilities, I wanted to present the precious relationship of friendship to show its importance. Hope I got all my thoughts and ideas across. Thanks a lot for each and every reader! I have no words to thank you for encouraging me and allowing me to write and express my ideas. Your final reviews would mean a lot to me! Thanks once again and special thanks to the reader Sue!**

**Take care. Goodbye readers **


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